Tell me, do you feel anything ?
I believe you do.
But you possess the sleight of hand
to put up a wall.
And I, feel like a fool
without any professional magic
to protect me,
and I always helplessly fall.
(11.03.2025)
Against the side fence,
four long planks of wood
ascended like steps supported
on pillars of old red bricks
serving as a stand
for my Grandmother's collection
of potted plants.
Cuttings from exotic species gifted
by friends, passed down family heirlooms
harboring memories of past lives,
feathery ferns and plump bellied cacti
battled South Australian
frosty winters and the baking heat
of a summer sun.
All throughout my childhood
they were sustained by love,
flowering on the cue of seasons
and erupting into green
in a yearly miracle of renewal.
I had this odd notion
that each plant found root and drew
from a medium beyond mere soil,
that a strange symbiosis existed
between plant and a human soul.
Not one succumbed to heat
or cold or fell victim to disease.
They grew as a constant, helping
to hold up a wall that gave
a safe and solid perimeter
to our lives.
When my Grandmother died,
they died too - at first
escaping notice in the shadow
of her passing. It was later
when bare spaces drew attention
to their absence and added
to the list of what was missed.
Time heals grief but memory
excavates the loss.
I hide behind the walls that I built
Made from failure and pride
And sorrow
And guilt
Just leave your name and number
On the back of my wall
And when I climb over
I’ll give ‘ya a call
See now’s not the time
I’m not in the right place
I’m not in my right mind
I can’t find the right face
And the baggage I carry
Won’t get off my back
And the troubles I married
Bring panic attacks
See when you’re losing it all
You shut it all out
You put up a wall
And then break it all down
It hurts when you fall
Life can get too intense
So I might tear down that wall
And maybe put up a fence
~Billy Hitz~
Land sakes alive what you been into child.
The sun is hot but the wind is mild.
My nose itches,
Someone’s coming with a hole in their britches.
Haven’t seen you in a coon’s age.
A hooting and hollering like an injun’s raid.
I’m fair ta middlin’can’t complain too much.
Barely getting along. Maybe just a touch.
Cooped up like chickens. Driving me up a wall.
Just living hand to mouth. Ain’t he got some gall.
How y’all fairin’ my tail is a dragging.
It’s hotter’n Hades my tongue is a wagging.
Ain’t that just the way. Well bless your heart.
Your pea picking soul. Worse than a popcorn fart.
Let the chips fall. Where there’s a will there’s a way.
Keep your chin up. Rome wasn’t built in a day.
In for a penny, in for a pound.
Like a dog in heat always sniffing around.
Give him an inch and he’ll take a mile.
Looking all fat and sassy with a turd eating smile.
Keep on crying, I’ll give you something to cry about.
Close your barn door before the horse gets out.
Uncle Sam is sure enough bleeding us dry.
Because I said so…that’s why!
As the shadows flee,
my dear, you have me
sighing,
but into the sea
the sun I can see
dying.
You are so carefree.
Please don’t let me be
crying.
Yes, it now is night,
and nothing feels right.
“Goodbye,”
you say. That’s a slight,
for with all my might
I try
to keep you in sight.
Though sweet words you write,
you lie!
You say I’m your all,
then put up a wall.
It’s true!
And always I crawl
like a wind-up doll.
I’m blue.
You make me feel small,
yet I fall and fall
for you.
March 21, 2023
I thought I was writing a virelei but was informed this is not one,
so I want to submit this to 'A BRIAN STRAND PREMIERE no 1202' Poetry Contest because I still look at it as a rhymed poem with a clear pattern
of stanzas!
Dear Heart,
I’d like to file a formal complaint
It seems that your an obsessive overachiever
That you take your job a little to seriously
Dear Heart,
Please stop breaking yourself into a million little pieces-
Because you fall in love with ideas and hypotheticals
Because you color people before they can show you their true aura
Dear Heart,
Why
Why do you find every crumbling transparent excuse for the world
But somehow you make yourself bleed
Why can’t you put up a wall against the hailing obscenities
Why can’t you knock down that wall for a genuine whisper
Dear Heart,
You were supposed to be a road map to happiness
But it seems I’m lost somewhere between I love you and I miss you
You are supposed to find contentment in success and lessons in failures
But you grasp for the next and the regret
Dear Heart,
I know your tired and broken
But Brain is telling me to tell you to stop crying
Dear Heart,
I’m sorry I yelled at you
I’m sorry I thought a bandaid was enough to fix you
Dear Heart,
I know your Shattered-
But I promise I won’t lose the pieces
We thought we’d be the first kids there, this was totally wrong.
Hundreds of people were shoved into Great-grandma’s tiny house.
Maybe fifty, anyway a lot.
I did not know any of them.
Come in! said a tall woman with a pinched McCormick nose.
My sister and I scooted in, holding up a wall.
Our mother escaped into the kitchen full of McCormick women.
It’s the twins! Someone said.
Great-grandma had eighteen children, not any twins.
How long do we have to stay? I whispered to my sister.
She shrugged.
Suzette, a mean first cousin walked in.
We ran toward her as if we liked her.
At least she was someone we knew.
“Suzette! Suzette!” We yelled.
She sneered at us and began playing with a second cousin.
Many lazy people in the U.S. of A.
Are living off of the burden taxpayers pay,
Living the dream,
Me wanna scream
Looney bin truck coming to carry me away.
People who will not work drive me up a wall
While good, decent folk are carrying the ball,
Laziness is not a virtue,
“A little work never hurt you!”
My mama said so, as best I can recall.
written June 16, 2021
when youve been sad for this long you become used to it
after awhile you learn not to
get so excited about the ¨good days¨ like you used to
you get used to being let down, disappionted,humiliated.
ive learned to stop letting people in
stop allowing them to know who i am
letting them strip away the little pieces of identity i have left.
you have to learn to build up a wall.
one people cant see thru.
one so strong and sturdy no one can possibly break it down
save yourself the betrayal
Dont get your hopes up.
I have shown her the worst that I could be but i don't think it wavered her love for me
I can't completely know but on this note is only right that more I sow
Everyday passes, she gives me more reason to let go of my problematic facets
Truth; i think i've been scared of getting hurt, so I built up a wall that limited my trust
She's hasn't given me a reason of incertitude, she's proven to have a heart of verisimilitude
I guess I have been holding back but not anymore, the cat's finally out of the bag
What more proof do I need, she's obviously the best person I've been blessed to meet
She sees me for who I am, understands me, appreciates me and still accepts me
Who does that these days? I guess I'm lucky I've found someone like that and she's bae
Her patience has been overwhelming and now in my heart, she is no doubt helming
Her level of understanding, I have underestimated but no more withstanding
I guess me always writing proves how she's interesting and how much she interests me
Sometimes saying I love her is not depth enough, cos more than any other person, she's beloved
Heather in a garden
Or heather in a store
Flowers beg a pardon,
Lovely forever more.
Vines climb up a wall,
Effortlessly tall
Vines climb up a gate,
Chopping is their fate.
Flowers and vines,
‘til the end of times.
Together forever
Trumpets and heather.
Patina lady, with torch in hand,
bastion of freedom in a promised land.
Now perish the principles upholding your base
by the internment of children in a zoo like place.
Patina lady when you were young
homeless from many shores did come
and gathered grateful at your hem,
American dream in view for them.
Patina lady, green like money
that flows through bytes as Wall Street honey.
No longer are welcomed the “tired and the poor.”
Put up a wall and shut the back door.
Patina lady, green like sickness
Let's clean you up to bronze with quickness.
There’s an urgent need to renovate
a nation that doesn't tolerate.
6/27/18
Protest poem : A poem with a message N/A Judged 4/6/19
NA re-run Poetry Contest Sponsored by: John Hamilton
Disappointment, I should be used to it by now
It breaks me every time, but I don't know how
I know they mean nothing, the promises you make
Promise that you'll keep them but they are destined to break.
I have built up a wall so high to cover up the pain
Yet you manage to get over it again and again
You make me believe once more that what you say is true
But you always cancel plans and you never come through.
I know I shouldn't get my hopes up that you might just change
But I keep hoping and hoping until it drives me completely deranged
So next time you make a promise that you intend not to keep
Don't bother making it, they are worthless, less than cheap.
Nazi Time
Uniformed men with ice blue
crystal eyes marched up and down
our street.
Bomb fell, the earth shook
and I was two years old.
An officer with steel rimmed glasses
and thin cruel lips said; this child is an Aryan.
Proudly clicked my heels and sucked my thumb.
Went to sleep, while mother sang
sentimental leider and dreamed of becoming
the Kindergarten`s Fhurer.
To my regret peace broke out and life
became rather dull for a while
until I was circumcised and could pea
higher up a wall against the wall
then the other boys, this made me
a natural leader
It was getting harder to recall
Those little things that just occurred
Her mind seemed to have put up a wall
And her thoughts were becoming blurred
It was a challenge to understand
The simplest of directions now
Her dear husband gave a helping hand
His love for her he did avow
Paranoia had soon settled in
She no longer wanted him ‘round
It was a battle she could not win
Memory was lost and not found
Her family felt her frustration
They were losing her fast they knew
Due to her lack of concentration
It left everyone feeling blue
Alzheimer’s became a dirty word
Shaking everyone to the core
God seemed to leave their prayers unheard
Wife, mom, grandma was here no more
Her very essence had been drifting
But her body sat there staring
They felt as though they should be grieving
Their confusion seemed unyielding
They all vowed to help her, day and night
Their love for her would always stay
Through thick and thin, they’d make her life bright
To bring some happiness her way
April 6, 2018
Dear Mother, now you know all my fears
The extent of how I miss you
You’ve been my best friend through all my years
It’s been hard for you and me too
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