If there was no poetry
I would visit ward psychiatry
For poems give energy
Free me from an allergy
When we vent our woes
Wonders wander with us
Nature gives insight much
Only to bounce back such
If there was no poetry
I would visit cemetery
For there I understand my symmetry
Apart from life’s geometry
When I compose verses
On current customs and crises
It makes me feel relaxed
With all worries axed
If there was no poetry
I would visit toiletry
For there I get ideas many
Only to pen in a manner funny
When we worship words
Love gushes like cattle herds
It makes us forget frustrations
And many small tribulations..!!
Bats who are hanging in need of a crap
Are advised to themselves not besmirch
Much better to go for a toiletry flap
Than do their own poo on their perch
For what, otherwise, from their uppermost end
Trickles down to the head through the fur
Proves gravity is not the roostdangler's friend
Especially when bowel movements stir!
Cleanliness
On my frequent lone walk by the old docks
I came across a building which turned out
to be a communal bathhouse.
It was incredibly cheap for a few pence
I got a towel and soap and had my first shower
I was at the time, elven years old.
And when I was short of change asked my mother
for not ice cream, but for a shower.
My brother said only poofters went there, how would
I know? I Didn`t see anyone wearing badges:
“I`m a gay person.”
There are shops where the old building stood and
by life`s irony sells perfume and toiletry.
I woke up with an enormously gassy gorilla sitting on my head.
Smelly flatulence is most probably what so quickly got me out of bed.
The most amazing part of the crazy story, is how he got through
That tiny little doggie door that barely accommodates Big Blue.
He followed me around and watched me doing my toiletry stuff.
He would not leave the kitchen, until I gave him an omelet with fluff.
He is sitting in my brown Lazy-boy right now, breaking it down.
I am smiling and waving, trying to remember not to frown.
Aha! Mystery solved. The front door is unlocked and open.
Maybe he will leave after lunch? I am going to be hope’n.
My husband wanders in and says “’Have you met my cousin Jim?”
Aha, Mystery solved. I know who let the intruder in.
No - I won't write for rankings or show
No - this doesn't have an eloquent flow
No - I don't like your pale, shoddy poetry
No - thanks, it's like cheap dime store toiletry
No - I won't play this sad, lame game
No - It's not a colossal pity or shame
No - Please don't cast your vote for me
No - This is not grand - I'm sure you'll agree
Mine Not Meant to Be
Face did bother me
The worst one it must be
Loved her toiletry.
Her face made me scream
One I found in a bad dream
Horrible did seem.
Found reality
Face was a fatality
Mine not meant to be.
Wow and a double wow.
Jim Horn
Memories Mirrored
by Odin Roark
A Boy Scout essential
The polished metal card mirror
The unbreakable monitor
Made to master Morse code
Used to measure wanna-be whiskers
And such
So it went
From puberty to manhood
Hall locker
To gym locker
Toiletry bag
To duffel bag
Afghan's mountain-dead
To triage hospital bed
Wrapped eyes needed little
Of the metal card mirror now
As blindness tearfully engaged
The enslavement of memory
MIRROR IMAGE – Octogenarian plus
Now
Here he comes
Master of the mansion –
complete with wrinkles, gas, cataracts, arthritis –
His mental package stuck in 30s fashion
The first chore was getting out of bed
Getting straight
Then into his head
That dreams have been scorched by light of day
Talking to himself –
this type insanity impending –
With quiet, projective things to say -
like
about normal toiletry and medication
all protectively arranged –
Done!
Then what?
What indeed when highlight of the day is
Going to market
Slowly driving his car
Remembering where in hell he parked it
Cats, birds, squirrels his friends -
uncomplicated you see –
have become so dear, like family
During his daily nap
Whiskers snuggles under his arm
With Tabby and Sweet Puss on his lap
Ummmmmmmm?
Well?
There’s lots more to tell about his day
But
Oh, hell!
Forgot what I was going to tell!
By the way
What IS today?
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