I can't imagine him in bed,
Chick lit needs to be read,
Draw down his manly jocks,
Does he leave on his socks?
Imagine the thrills,
Before our cardiac pills,
Is this erotic? I say,
Whose love resonates today?
Ah, it's ephemeral bliss,
Sending him my loving kiss,
On snogging there is no ban,
Biohazards, our human span!
To snag a prince, ambitious ladies
bet all their money on a snog
but as a rule they end up getting...
a frog.
I had to get out for I’d been too long single
I rang round a couple of mates
The Halloween party, I wanted to mingle
Perhaps we could get us some dates
Across the ballroom a witch with a broom
Her haggard face craggy and wizened
I wished I could find me a beauty and… BOOM!
My fairy Godmother had listened
The lights seemed to glare and I could only stare
As the music became less apparent
The girl that approached me was beyond compare
And everyone else seemed transparent
Her near azure eyes would conspire to beguile
She would glide with a sensuous gait
She gave me a look I’d not seen in a while
And her smile could turn gay fellows straight
With no introduction just instant seduction
She planted my hands on her hips
My gentleman’s manners faced instant reduction
As we savoured each other’s lips
That night was a sure thing, I had little doubt
That soon she’d be scratching my itch
A clicking of fingers then I heard a shout
Terry… you’re snogging the witch!
What's a billabong, a bop on the noggin”
In Oz, they speak funny, harkens back to their login
They misunderstood
Puters in all likelihood
Thought it was a passing fad, much-preferred snoggin'
(look it up!)
I am sure
A no brainer
that fought like sin,
Too much aggro
for want of snogging,
Lay in a fix of drugs
in shooting gallery,
Wearing the best of
the bib and tucker,
Became a crapshoot,
a bunny rabbit
that wore long johns,
Wandered in main drag
with ghetto blaster,
Out of the rathole
up to a ritz,
Dreams smoked
as fortitude failed,
Guts were an eyewash,
I was no fool,
Giving up a think
will turn on,
A woman of today
I wasn't born yesterday !
Written July 27th, 2015
For contest "Colloquialisms" by Laura
I can’t believe I finally fell… in love
Oh, what I felt in my heart locked up my lips
The pleasant picture I saw rocked all my ribs
This darling dame was like an angel from above
We were drowning deep playing the golden game
I became her hero and when’re it rains I’m her rainbow
She became my shadow and all night… she’s my pillow
We share life and love as if we’re sharing flower and frame
I decided to spend this sweet summer
With my sweetie, a blue beautiful butterfly
Her love radiates my heart like the stars in the sky
I am cocooned in comfort… in this warm weather
Swimming, strolling singing and snugging
Lost in the steamy summer love as we roll and roam
Forgetting we have just few days left to go back home
On the sweet sand at the beach we couldn’t stop snogging
'
Happiness to me,is as easy as can be,
a doughnut and a cup of English tetley tea.
Lying on my beige leather sofa,
Covered by a Woolen red tartan rug,
Hugging and Kissing,Fondling and snogging,
Just watching T.V.
Charma
Happiness to me,is as simple as can be,
A Doughnut and a Cup Of English Tetley tea,
Covered by a Woolen Soft blanket,
Lying On a Comfy Sofa,Cuddling and Kissing,
Hugging and Snogging,Watching t.v.
Charma
POOR AUNT MAUDE
Sitting bored I sat and sighed
How inconvenient old aunt Maud had died
I wouldn’t be here if the old bat was still talking
Watching the relatives sipping and walking
Gestures of sadness filled the room
When holding a drink George fell over a broom
Sister sue was covered in sherry
Everyone shrieked when George landed on Jerry
Jerry was happy, as he thought his luck had changed
Poor old George blushed as their looks exchanged
Not a sigh, no one was bored
They were all running around
Look like they had ants in their pants good lord
In all their excitement someone passed wind
Open a window lets have a glass of gin
I wonder who knocked Aunt Maud’s ashes in the bin
Oh my gawd what a sin auntie’s ashes in the bin
No one noticed as the gin began to flow
Sue once on the sherry was now snogging Joe
They all looked on with smiley faces
Jerry now tipsy was tweaking Malcolm’s braces
What a farce I jumped up quick
Not one to miss an opportunity click, click, click
Poor aunt Maud in the bin covered in George’s puking sick