Funny Sick Poems | Examples
These Funny Sick poems are examples of Sick poems about Funny. These are the best examples of Sick Funny poems written by international poets.
I remember when you were young
You and I had so much fun
You were funny you were kind
I never thought you'd lose your mind
But now I've seen you fade away
The shell of a man you are today
It started whith your memory lost
We knew that you would pay the cost
You forgot your own wife's name
Though you knew you loved her just the same
The doctors gave you the sad news
Everything you were you'd lose
Although you're not the friend I knew
I will still stand by you
I'll try to give you some support
I know you tried I know you fought
This awful disease has robbed your wife
Of the husband she swore to have for life
It's robbed your children of their dad
And robbed me of the friend I had
And you're just one and that's a fact
There are many who will not come back
This terrible disease must be ended
Though the broken lives will not be mended
And I pray they'll find a way
To stop dementia one day
And then this scurge will lose its power
And we will celebrate the very hour
Once I ate a defective Oreo
I’d imported from Lower Borneo
I’d spent too much money
My stomach felt funny
Then my 'plumbing' gave it the old heave-ho
Following me wherever I go
My greatest fear and my biggest foe
Long dark nights you keep me awake
Even the beating of your heart
And your breathing like a snake
I wish you would leave me alone
I hear your voice every time I pick up the phone
I tried one time to hurt you
I watched the rock as it flew
Seven years of bad luck but I’m still not done with you
A Message of Hope **
Seek inspiration in every day
Despite it's cruel intentions.
Find the bitter taste in rain that falls
Delightful just to mention
Learn to love all of your pains
From bunions up to brains.
The voices in your head are friends,
Enjoy their ridicule and games
Romanticise your anguish well,
If not then, what's the point?
Create your own little world of hell
Snort coke, smoke a joint
Whatever you choose to do from here
If you're caring, or if you're crude.
Just bear in mind, it matters not
Your living; is getting screwed
A cough and a sneeze
another tissue please
Nose runny throat sore
fatigue and feeling wore
Slight fever lost appetite
wanting it to end to feel right.
Vicks rub on the chest
a little under and in the nose
Wool socks upon the feet
gotta warm those toes
Plop plop fizz fizz
tickles down the hatch
Couch drops and a cozy couch
for those daytime naps.
Steam the room with a vapo machine
and unclog sinuses breathe right
Extra blankets and big fluffy pillow
with NyQuil to sleep all night
Eat hot chicken soup from a can
drink 7 UP in orange juice
Speak with a funny cold's voice
mask up if you are out on the loose.
The older you are the longer they stay
stubborn head colds won't go way
Suck on lozenges for that throat
resist chewing them just don't
And one day you will wake anew
that old head cold is through with you.
A man got sick, needed specialists' aid,
All organs were treated, no hope did they fade,
But alas, in the end,
The man met his end,
Happily ever after, his organs stayed.
there once was an old farmer named Dick
he injected his cows that were sick
Bessie mooed “oh no!”
as Dick slipped in a hole
“Don’t you bellow, it’s just a little prick”
they say it’s just a common cold
it comes across so brash and bold
an apple a day
it is what they say
only healthy people were polled
a-lot-a money
how you run it
doesn’t want her to go
Seen ‘‘em leave
like rookie pro
my feet smell
my nose runs
my heart breaks
my tongue is tied
my liver is chopped
my brain is cramped
my spare rib is missing
my throat harbors a frog
my sweet tooth is craving
my eye teeth need glasses
my funny bone isn’t laughing
my athlete’s foot lost the race
my sense of humor is twisted
my heel ran back to Achilles
my ear drum lost its rhythm
my pinky broke its promise
my mouth has a foot in it
my toes are hammered
my fingers are crossed
my lips are sealed
my fever broke
my breath is short
I’m long in the tooth
I can’t see eye to eye
the bridge of my nose is narrow
Call the Doctor!
There once was a cowboy from Nevada.
He wore a barf bag as a bandana.
When he rode on his horse,
his sickness grew worse,
and his intestines flared with melena.
There're a lot of
Strange, funny and weird stories
It's common to be employed as a stuntman in acting
But not to be employed for something evils
But not to be employed as a scapegoat
Maybe a ghost is looking for a substitute
But it's certainly ridiculous
To look for a stand-in for sickness
To look for a stuntman for your fate
Similarly, never take for granted
Never ask for a stuntman in your prayer
Because God has had been a "stuntman"
To die for all mankind on the cross
Didn't you remember
So don't ask for a "stuntman" any more
So don't blame God any more
I've got a great mate called Mickey,
Some say a talented bricky.
One day he was late,
Not stood at his gate.
Looks like he's throwing a sicky.
18/2/2022
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Asthma
A dumbfounding struggle for what is plenty in the air,
The shortest of unsure breaths drawing,
The hesitant oxygen inwardly cursing;
A judging of the whole affair unfair.
My trachea thinking of its resignation letter,
Worsening the picture of Seeker of the Better;
My two lungs scheming to lock up their shop,
Evidently not touched that a life might drop!
A straight cash payment for my casket witnessing,
The quickest arrival of any inhaler pressing
To like a monkey grab it
And just remember not to like a buffoon actuate it.
It has been an army of surest triggers
Of the asthmas of Gents and s
Between the Extremely Cold and the Awfully Hot,
The Chokingly Dusty and bad smells we’ve got,
The Painfully Annoying and the Helplessly Funny;
The Unhelpfully Laborious or tasks perfectly thorny
Yep, all extremities
Lacking in niceties
That should a doctor lift off his feet
To quell The Respiratory Rebellion – a feat
Santa looks bleak in twenty twenty
Covid came alive to give plenty
Of grief throughout the year
Parting from Christmas cheer
Sure that quarantines will be many
~
The elves were worried about Yuletide
In Mrs. Claus, they were to confide
Rudolph’s nose lost it’s glow
All the reindeer were slow
This virus brought despair to divide
~
This year had been very sad and bleak
Santa was feeling like a antique
He’d lost some of his hair
Mrs. Claus wasn’t aware
Had she known, she’d have given a shriek