Short Turd Poems

don't the pretty girls just love a bad boy.. butterflies swarming a turd...

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A marvel of nature is a bird

    You've seen it eat, but where's its turd...

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loo paper and turd
remain in the toilet bowl ~
who forgot to flush?...

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Professor Mortimer Snurd
   Once dissected a turd.
His findings couldn't be analyzed
   They'd already fertilized....

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Third Bush Not

Jeb!
Supports brothers Iraq War misstep.
Past history gives confidence a third
Will also likely be a turd....

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Honey, I baked a casserole for you
(My secret ingredient: a turd or two!)



Received 4th place in "any funny poem" contest...

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A birder in search of a bird
Just slipped on a buffalo turd
Sharp as a tack
Flat on his back
He learned not to follow the herd!...

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The news has become quite absurd
Mocking the journalistic word
Often appealing
Never revealing
Just dishing out mountains of turd...

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Saturday is my favourite 
day; but I may have 
ruined it forever 
after realising
that is has 
the word
turd in
it...

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In the beginning was the bird
Shortly thereafter dropped a turd
It fell in Eve's hair
She roared like a bear
But Soup Censors heard the F-word...

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the teacher called for a c word
the nerd though she  meant a turd 
he spelled it out long
and still it was spelled wrong
he stood with his face looking blurred...

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Turd is an extremely happy word
People snicker when someone says turd
Childish no doubt
What's it about
It's only a word like happy chirpy birds...

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What rhymes with the word “word”
Yup you guessed it, the word is turd
Kinda low class
Like whatta huge ass
Good for haulin' huge loads I've heard...

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much pain
incurred?

sounds like
a turd

be not
deterred

with time
heart’s cured

—————

Response to Caren Krutsinger’s A Little Bird Told Me...

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There was a certain computer nerd
Who yearned to do something absurd---
   He went to the john
   It came out all brown---
Delighted, he could now program a turd...

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What rhymes with the word “word”
Yup you guessed it, the word is turd
Kinda low class
Like whatta huge ass
Good for haulin' huge loads I've heard...

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What rhymes with the word “word”
Yup you guessed it, the word is turd
Kinda low class
Like whatta huge ass
Good for haulin' huge loads I've heard...

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Everyone knows that a turd is a turd... is a turd ...is a turd; untill someone slaps a high price tag on it, and then they'll find reasons to like its distinctive smell....

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Down to earth is all I can be
Pretentiousness is very foreign to me
Simple's a good word
Describes this old turd
By my writings, I'm sure you'll agree!!! ...

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To get my mind off war and inflation
I’ve watched the trial for defamation.
  But from what I’ve heard
  that scorned Amber Turd
should be on trial for defecation!...

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A turd by any other name would still be a turd
A bird by any other name would still be a bird
Birds can fly
Turds still try
Destined for failure and their odor's beyond words...

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There are some very hilarious words
One, in particular, is the funny word "turd"
Where did it originate
Probably in grade eight
When some kid was trying to say the word third...

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There are some very hilarious words
One, in particular, is the funny word "turd"
Where did it originate
Probably in grade eight
When some kid was trying to say the word third...

Read More

There are some very hilarious words
One, in particular, is the funny word "turd"
Where did it originate
Probably in grade eight
When some kid was trying to say the word third...

Read More

I'd rather be a nerd than a turd.                                                                                                  I don't believe in revolution, but I may believe in Armaggeddon....

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