Friendship Satire Poems | Examples

These Friendship Satire poems are examples of Satire poems about Friendship. These are the best examples of Satire Friendship poems written by international poets.


My Mate's a Primate

I have a friend who beats his chest 
Who thinks he's tough, an ego blessed 
He goes out clubbing, club in hand 
Neanderthal romance, clubber lang. 

He drinks banana daiquiris by the bowl 
Experiments with chest wigs, an anthropoids soul 
He apes around to attract a mate 
A regular swinger awaiting his fate. 

My mate's a primate, completely nuts 
He likes jungle rap and scratching buts 
He knows his trees and their Latin names 
Defecates in bushes without any shame. 

My mate's a primate, he's natures fan 
A big white grin and an amazing arm span 
He cracks nuts with feet, his party trick 
Employs his member as a measuring stick.


Premium MemberThe Wizard of Odds

What are the odds
              The under
                           The over
The chance of portraying
                               Poor Toto
                                            As Rover.
Lions and tigers and bears
Disguised
              As their frightening fears.

Friendship discovered
When nobody listens
                            Somebody hears.
And witches
                   Like Glenda
How could she offend ya
Such courage
                   Such heart
                                   a brain.
And a Wizard
                  Who knew
Was just like me and you
                                  Afraid to admit
He knew not what to do.

I shall end this brief spiel
With a click of the heel
And to those who object
Say…
‘C’MON FOLKS, GET REAL!”

John G. Lawless
©2/18/2023

Premium MemberBeware the Otters

Of many times we have in life,
Like some within the water.
A charm it seems, but darkness rife,
The mean and precious otter.

When first you glance, how beautiful,
And cute from feet to ears,
But deep inside, not viewable,
Is more than it appears.

The otter, such savage beast,
which kills it’s own for fun.
It rips and claws until deceased,
And leave it when it’s done.

Then don’t forget the way it stalks,
To torture baby seals.
And off away it gladly walks,
With other otter meals.

So in your world, just be aware,
Of cute but full of strife,
And gaze upon the otters there,
That swim about your life.
© Jd Maxwell  Create an image from this poem.

Premium MemberFor Lovers of Ale

That amber liquid far from insipid
Like molten honey but drawn from a tap,
Bitter or dark, the choices quite stark,
God's malted ale, nature's true sap.

Vikings grew strong, strengthened their bond,
Giving them courage for mayhem galore,
A beer in their hand, they pillaged the land
Never quite feeling tired or sore.

The Celts used for curing, Egyptians for luring
Their gods from the heavens bribed to partake,
The English just drank as their water so stank,
Beer their solution to gulp for life's sake.

Wine lovers admit that their glass needs
be sipped
While describing aromas of berries and earth,
No such constraint, nor need for restraint
For drinkers of ale are freewheeling from birth.

So let raise a jug or a frothy filled mug
While watching a game and eating junk food,
Nothing is wetter, more luscious and better
Than a cold tasty beer when expertly brewed.

Premium MemberAttention, Comrades

~  Attention, Comrades! ~

  
  We have realized our vision
    of systemic equity!

  Raise two fingers in triumph
    'V,' for Victory!

  Every distinction eliminated
    The struggle now won!

  We are all second-class citizens
    Utopia officially begun!


Memorial

There are a few facts I know. 
You weren't happy at that moment. 
I controlled you, puppet on a string.
You never had my friendship.

Except on bank jobs. 
You never had three decades of her in your life. 
I get this info from your letter to me.
 
Why not email like other people? 
Did you want to be different? 
Leaving a physical written reminder of your discord. 
It doesn't matter now, not to me. 
I informed the thought police. 

You're a wanted man. 
Not by me; by them. 
Especially if you write me again. 
Pain will be your friend. 

Not mental anguish but broken bones. 
Do me a big favour cus and do one. 
Your letter reminds me of you and a certain girl. 
If she knew of your feelings and actions, would she cry? 
No, because I'd shoot her. 

Then marry her sister and have a family. 
I'd name our kids after you both. 
Maybe I'll do that anyhow. 

Call it a memorial to you and your ruined legacy. 
Goodbye fading memory, gangster no more.
I'm victorious and have got all the loot.

False Friend

Just lives to upset you
               claims he is  always right
               does not offer  foot or hand
               never comes to assist you ...
               Wishes to control your way of changing
               don't accept your success
               desires  your monopoly
               hope for your failure ...
               Don't accept your friends
               speak badly of your character
               says that everyone is enemy
               demands further your friendship ...
               False friend is all that
               neither offers taste or snack
               it's just neck meat,
               removes your soul and gnaw the bone ...!

Premium MemberShortest Engagement In History

“What kind of juggery is this?”
“Are you saying I am a deceiver?”
“What? Just because you have a sleigh of hand?”
“Who are you calling a trickster?”

“No one. I just wanted to know whose juggery this is.”
“It was mine.”

“You’re quite a trickster, aren’t you?”
“Are you calling me a cheat?”

“Definitely not. I am calling you a talent, and asking you to teach me.
“Are we friends or not?”
“Yes, but it is going to cost you.”
“If it costs me, it’s the end of the friendship.”

“What do you want to know?”
“How do you do it?”
“I was born with it. Natural talent, and my folks worked for the circus.”
“So you one of those.”

“I sure am, and I am sorry but we only teach our family.”
“Marry me?”
“I barely know you.”
“But now you know I’m a risk taker. Isn’t that important?
“It sure is.”
“So we are getting married?”
“You would fit well into the family for sure.”
“Is that a yes?”
“It is an ‘I’ll think about it.””
Shortest engagement in history; 
they needed a young woman for a con on Tuesday.

Premium MemberBosom Buddies

Sir Trump is now all chummy with Sir Kim
A pair of bosom buddies, kith and kin --
   Trump tweets out Joe Biden
   'Your bird-brain is hiding' --
Hey, what's yours, Sir Trump, a phantom limb

Sweet Scenerio

A rat carries a cat on its small back
They whisper love all the way

From the Back of the Bus

From the Back of the Bus

The journey to school via that yellow tin can
They call it a bus at least where I come from, man

Long and narrow it transports it’s precious cargo
And delivers daily where we must show to grow

My favorite destination of that vehicle not of choice
Was the back of the bus so I could hide inside and rejoice

Many lessons were learned on the way to school
Observing life from that back of that melting pot pool 

One learned about friendship between two friends
The shy kid whose ride was a means to an end

The bully that would run amok
Those were the ones that would have me duck

There were smiles and frowns alike
Most days I would rather ride my bike

Some days were up but most days were down
In the midst of the crowd and the class clown

Intersperse that beautiful girl 
And the kids that made you want to hurl

Some were kind and some were tough
Seeing some of both was enough

Not realizing at that young age 
This was preparing us for a different life stage

The ride was a daily grind
While I was looking for something else to find

From the back of the bus

Andreas Simic©

Please Unfriend Me

Please Unfriend Me

No slow paced emotions
In this hi-tech, jet age
Why wait to know the other
Over time
No use looking for secure and long lasting friendship
When the same is available
On the go
The face looks likeable
Just a click
But do follow the norm- be polite
Request him/her for friendship
I would love to see you
Doing the same face to face
Anyhow, don’t worry about gender and age
These things do not matter
Start a chat and then chatter
Friendship for sure has gone hep
Just a little tap
And voila
Both of you
Completely unknown
Never met in life persons
Are friends
And what is best
This friendship
Gets celebrated all over the world
By similar, like-minded people
Don’t worry if you’ve had your fill
Want to end the friendship
All you have to do is simply
Unfriend him
And that person
Is out of your life as if
He never existed on this planet in the first place
So you see
It’s all so simple
Man and emotions were making the
Darn thing complex
Now for those who are dumb
Can’t take sarcasm
Mate
Don’t hesitate
Feel free
Please unfriend me.
© Vijai Pant  Create an image from this poem.

Fiancee

A lone butterfly
With eyes closed for a time
Gluing on petal

A Poem To My Friends Outside Africa

I write this poem to you 
my friends beyond Africa
do not read them now
I will burn the little script
the smoke of which I burn
shall be carried to you there
by new hurricane Katrina
and Tsunami of the oceans
and by the true spirit of oneness
that you may breathe in
and remember how much I love you
then come and join hearts with me
in free African love style
the love that humanity hunkers for

Premiere

To bring forth and take in                                                The debut of lost lines                                                         That’s the problem with Houston                                   Come backs are never easy                                               When the rugged steal beneath your feet                       And a monster takes on a life of its own                                    In the wind was where we wanted to be                             My grey phone doesn’t have redial                                 While bonding the name so cool                                        Choppy smells of the apocalyptic morning rise            As a teacher waxes old and new                                         Frankly in the wind madam                                               Accepting what I did not want                                           Starting a friendship is beautiful thing I think
© John Beam  Create an image from this poem.

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