A youth, that's me, caught unaware -
who knew, I could be one to care?
For me, at least, love was in the air,
and it was so true
when I first met you.
My heart never beat like this before,
an open door, a mixed metaphor,
the thing I was living for.
This, I finally knew
when I fell in love with you.
This doesn't happen every day.
If I may, I just have to say,
it's pure luck to feel this way
once in a lifetime or two,
meeting one like you.
But then, I came to understand,
you could never hold my hand.
It wasn't what God had planned,
leaving me broken and blue.
Before I won you, I lost you.
After all the intervening years,
and an endless stream of tears,
my love for you never disappears.
The only thing in view,
my darling, still, is you.
The flowers beneath my feet
testify to my soul's retreat,
Goodbye forever! Dare I repeat,
after all that I've been through,
dear one, how I love you.
Welcome to McPoetry Soup. May I take your order, please?
Sure. Give me a McSonnet and a McSoda.
What would you like on your McSonnet?
Oh. How about a McMetaphor and a McSimile?
Well, we're all out of McMetaphors. You can have a Mixed Metaphor, though
No thanks. Er, cancel the McSonnet. I'll take a McMonorhyme instead.
OK. Don't be brave. Please lave before you satisfy your crave, you knave.
No, no. McNever! The McMonorhyme SANDWICH!
The one over which they McRave in the grave?
Fugettaboutit, ok? I'll just stick with a McSoda.
McSmall, McMedium, or McLarge?
McPlease just go away, would you?
I McWould if I McCould. But I'm McStuck here all McKnight.
Scene fades out: McMutter, McMumble, McGrumble, McStumble…
(Exeunt all)
(Victorian artist William Holman Hunt was
both attracted and repelled by his models)
Can we agree that, terrified of sex,
Hunt couldn’t help but hunt it, seek it out?
There doesn’t seem to be a shred of doubt.
He felt his women exercised some hex,
conspiracy throughout the lower decks,
full frontal on his Puritan redoubt!
He hated what he couldn’t live without
(the only punter in the multiplex).
And Annie, Fanny, Edith – on they came,
alluring, curing, reassuring, fey,
and Hunt (who fastened fast on blame and shame)
was racked by guilt and had to run away.
Another mantis, but the same old prey,
(mixed metaphor) Hunt headed for the flame.
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