Long Weensy Poems

Where art thou anonymous benefactor...to offer me succor?

Ah... methinks legal tender 
could be a boon to help me bolster 
mein kampf with necessary material equipage,
which prospect to acquire essential 
commodities sabotaged 
at the altar of...

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FICTIONAL BIO:

The missus asked me
(hitherto known as her bozo)
just mere moments ago
to craft humorous poem to glow
nsync with the shiny nose of Rudolph
keeping syncopated metrical flow
thus methought to crow
about being equally as foolish
streaking naked outside...

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Friday May 13th, 2022

An excerpt taken from a lengthy tome,
written courtesy a favorite poet of mine.

Paraskevidekatriaphobia  struck within a blink,
I swear yours truly never took a drink,
nevertheless he witnessed
and falsely accused of being a...

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Sexually explicit meme more real day

originally written May 31st, 202_
humorously, posthumously, 
and tempestuously expressing woes
from the top of my talking head 
to gnarly nails of 
(this little piggy fame) toes
in sore need and want 
of...

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No matter I got prescribed Glycopyrrolate 2 mg tablets taken four times a day...,

not one drop of sweat
(especially on hot humid and hazy days) 
less than a gallon 
exudes forth from my pores
but nevertheless 
I...

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primary idiopathic palmar/
palmoplantar hyperhidrosis
despite taking  Glycopyrrolate 
2 MG Tablet three times daily.

Aforementioned physiological malady
the bane worse than death
unwanted and unwonted figurative
(metaphorical) beast of burden
linkedin with matrix constituting mine
corporeal essence genetically
gifted to yours truly,
invariably, objectionably,...

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I cannot single handedly – rightly so - manage...
primary idiopathic palmar/
palmoplantar hyperhidrosis
despite taking  Glycopyrrolate 
2 MG  Tablet three times daily.

Aforementioned physiological malady
unwanted and unwonted figurative
(metaphorical) beast of burden
linkedin with matrix constituting mine
corporeal essence...

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Scotch Tape Sweepstakes

The easy to handle
sticky sided material
made of a variety of materials, including
cellulose acetate, polypropylene,
PVC, and adhesive
(alluded to in the title)
applied in an innovative manner
allowing, enabling, and providing me
the means and ways to affix...

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I cannot single handedly manage...
primary idiopathic palmar/
palmoplantar hyperhidrosis

Aforementioned physiological malady
unwanted and unwonted figurative
(metaphorical) beast of burden
linkedin with matrix constituting mine
corporeal essence genetically
gifted to yours truly,
invariably, objectionably, and unquestionably
afflicts, impacts, and upsets
emotional (mental) health
diagnosed with schizoid...

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The Antics Of A Yoyo Thief

Potential life of as juvenile delinquent
(ala bam mean future streetwise thug)
stopped dead in the tracks – manacles
the above two lines hopefully gives hint
nearly changing changing life of one boy
an undersized...

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A fanta see overrides reality!

Hello?
I like to get positioned for sixty nine. 

Are you looking for a scheming, 
schlepping, and schvitzing writer? 
natural body and laid-back vibe??
I'm all about therapeutic touch via
bolts, nuts, screws 
and...

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(Garden yourself and Emmanuel 
against risking life and limb,
especially as dark shadows edge - 
of night bring dim
mention onset of when shifting shapes swim
all around reducing slice 
of daylight slim).

I write thee today
September 13th, 2019...

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She's a Messenger, a standard bearer of a Message of Love.  She's Love's unforgettable fruition and flower.  With Her trusty hounds bounding along beside Her, She suddenly races ahead, crossing the beach, down...

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Now scores of years 
after botched minor theft penchant 
courtesy security guard
analogous to inquisitorial trenchant
unforgettable verbal lashing
(suppressing me ululation to vent)
unwittingly arresting snitch behavior
plus potential life of crime.

Not a peep passed thru 
pursed lip o'...

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Hello?
I like to get six + 9 ??Are you??????
schlepping writer,?? natural body and laid-back vibe?? 
I'm all about therapeutic touch via nuts and life of bee dogged trees!

teasing with idealism beef hoar 
   illusory vision fades away
whatever ur...

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the first move made was the worst move
played---making like the sky had parted &
somebody was watching over, somebody
was lighting a candle for the struggle, as if
it was over by a long shot---for getting things
back in...

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It is amazing how many super important people there are in my hometown!
At almost any intersection, I will be eclipsed by at least 2-3 individuals who are cooler
Than I could ever aspire to think to...

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Courtesy handy dandy
palmar hyperhidrosis
impossible mission to defeat
except poe wet tickly
even courtesy drysol.

(Me slippery fingers slither,
slip and slide splashing ala
Jackson Pollock), sans slap
dash experimental, swiftly

tailored and harried writing
style, yes on par with purging,
spewing, venting...unexpurgated,
unexpressed, unexplained... 
words,...

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(Me slippery fingers slither,
slip and slide splashing ala
Jackson Pollock), sans slap
dash experimental, swiftly

tailored and harried writing
style, yes on par with purging,
spewing, venting...unexpurgated,
unexpressed, unexplained... 
words, which this Engelbert

Humperdinck singer/songwriter,
(whose name inexplicably popped
into the mind of this...

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The Antics Of A Would Be Mama's Yoyo Thief
(now a penchant with less Zionist trenchant ululation to vent.)

Not a peep passed thru mine -
aye vaguely attest
what ten? eleven? twelve? age
of following anecdote at best
guest, but...

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wish i could have been
in Egypt 
earlier today, to join in
throwing tomatoes &
chanting “Monica! Monica!
Monica!” with those who 
were disgusted by Sec. of
State Clinton’s arrival to
help beef up american
companies in the newly
submissive country,
under the guise...

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Ugh, Why Must The Missus Vacuum At The Crack Of Dawn?
(circa: early December 27, 2018 morning)

There appears to be a
virulent (possibly deadly) strain
of housekeeping virus
Hoover ring in the air
asymptomatic tentatively linked to rein
deer droppings (micro-organisms)...

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On beginning to compose a new poem...

Assaying thoughts gambol,
scuffling as in an affray
née crushing, jockeying, stampeding...
demanding equal airplay
gushing as metaphorical think
spigot turned on full force airway
thru totally tubular cerebral

microcosmic aisleway
vesicular conduit fifty
plus shades of gray
exhaling...

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The Complaints Of Ducks
the city
filled in
the small
pond
in the middle
of my tiny
poem.

all the ducks
came to
my door
and complained 
i am
simple
i agree
in the meekest
of language.

that they 
have been
unhomed.

it is 
my duty
they tell 
me as a poet
to open
the ...

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My somewhat outsize ears and longish neck 
(I swear exist, which contrary to popular myth 
never seen by living persons) support this egg shaped 
(fried or scrambled some might argue) head.

A mostly flat and hairless...

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