Long Go through the motions Poems
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Peter and I are together and we’re in a grove.
Time is our treasure, precious and dwindling.
I watch for signs of the future unfolding,
like a twitch that might be the first sign of a stroke.
Answers will come - slowly - or they’ll parachute in from nowhere.
We spend a lot of time together but most of it is spent studying.
We both have silences that shouldn’t be penetrated.
I have so many questions, but I keep them at a safe distance,
so I don’t feel the need to interact with them.
All I know is we’re alive, and we still have to dance.
It's not always fun, operating in the face of uncertainty
but what else can we do - except go through the motions?
“When exactly did the world lose its collective mind?” I asked, reading the news on my iPad.
Peter looked up from the book he was highlighting with a phosphorescent pink pen.
“They’ve found toxic metals in CHOCOLATES. Everywhere.” I announced, like that Poe bird.
“I guess we’re canceling chocolate then,” he said, sarcastically, “we’ll adapt.”
“Yeah, you bet.” I said with genuine irony.
I Have Accepted How You Feel
I wonder if being in this marriage is very hard for you
Trying to show love when your heart is split in two
Interested in one woman while accepting another
Constant daydreams of this woman being your lover
I have seen you glaring at her but too bad, she's married
Why didn't you confess to her the feelings you carried
Are you unhappy with me because I'm nothing like her
Why did you marry me and not the woman you prefer
It's a shame that this marriage is a one way street
I'm in love with you and wish you were with me
What makes things easier is accepting how you feel
Not constantly nagging you to show love that isn't real
I will never measure up to her standards and don't want to
If she had to face what I deal with everyday, she would be through
I'm not asking you how and where I went wrong
Just an innocent party in a marriage that I don't belong
You have never said it, I watched and observe
Being married to you gave a lesson undeserved
Thinking back, I should have left you where I found you
Why did you go through the motions of saying "I Do"
Now your stuck in something that you can't get out of
This is your fault for not marrying the woman you loved
In this beautiful place of worship, the pews are padded but uncomfortable, the sanctuary large, candle lit and cold.
There's a huge glass dome and I can see the stars. Are the stars our fiery heaven??
No, I don't think the stars care about us - they don't burn with affection or passion. And if the stars weren't there we could live with an empty sky.
The Greeks would call our star, the Sun, to perform their acts of God. I imagine most of their prayers went unanswered - not unlike our own??
To me, the whole Jesus story is somewhat sinister and inauspicious, but if Jesus, the son of God, and that whole story were the deepest, truest reality - then why hasn't Jesus returned??
**Imagining heaven's father and son dialog**
God: "Ok, Jesus, time to go back.."
Jesus: "Go back... go back?? Daaaaad... Did you see what they DID to me? Nailed me to a cross! Screw them, there's no way I'm going back. Why don’t you try going back, as an ordinary man - maybe they’ll set you on fire.”
These 20 millennium old bible stories aren't exactly Euclid's logical system.... I mean, the various books aren't even *consistent*. Are these really, I mean really our beliefs? Or are they just kind of *traditions* and good rules to live by?
My parents - unlikely pilgrims of the intoxicating poetry of belief - face front and appear to be listening... in all other things they're so *skeptical* - it's a puzzle.
If Jesus did come back, wouldn't he practically be a caveman surrounded by bewildering technology?
I'm sorry, there's something too rich in creation for these rehearsed responses and fairy-tale fragments from a primitive world to be the answer.
Now I'm not saying there is no God or no life after death.. I.. just..
*hopeless shrug*
So, anyway - I go through the motions, I chant the litanies with the enthusiasm of obedience; just storing up my spiritual loot and hiding my questioning, heathen heart.
Happy Easter Everyone!
This cry for help goes unheard
Rivers flow from within
As my emotions cave-in.
I’m blooded, beaten and not really living
I go through the motions and continue existing.
She screams and kicks wanting more than I can lift.
I glare at this sicken reflection
And sense a feeling of rejection.
You smile and giggle when we do for you
All you know is that we are pleasing you.
You accuse, abuse and cast the blaming
Without caring, you are the cause for our shaming.
My ears bleed from your hateful words
From all the sorries left unheard.
I can never say how I feel, because the
Happy smiles I wore were all too real.
Instead of telling you, all my feelings
Perhaps this gesture will be more appealing.
This color is your favorite
Don’t be angry for the staining
You are the cause for this ending
Because through all the pleasing
I never was really living
- I take a step back to reflect. Fecal matter storms a reality check in to the mental hotel of chaos. In utter disorder; rationality eludes us. Cluelessly, we are insane—on a temporary leave of absence. Senselessly numb; simply, simple... Obsolete and discreet, keeping eyes down low. Hidden from the world; we stick out like sore thumbs. An overwhelming sense of paranoia takes wheel; who's driving? Slippery when wet; we slide. Uncontrollably... Unmistakeable, but make no mistake. Masks that we wear are transparent; fooling only some. High strung like the strings of an old banjo, our dirty laundry is airing out. The presence of stains shout out secrecy in whispers, silently broken. We enable auto pilot and go through the motions; subtly coded from paranoia. This ride becomes turbulent. Lightning strikes and in a flash, real gets real. Feelings of panic offset stabity. Balance forced to recollect. Frantically scrambling to find our lost librium. Playing cards that we repeatedly deal out ourselves, it's time to go manual. Reality delivers a stunning right hook; drawing first blood. Dazed and confused, fight or flight mode sets in. Voices of criticism echo in our heads. Self doubt secures confidence with an iron fist. Insanity begins it's never ending rant, as we argue amongst ourselves. Our worst nightmares become reality. At this moment it becomes impossible to deny. We are who they thought we were.
Many times we cry without tears
The fears we attach to our subconscious mind
We become blind to our destiny
Yet we discover that silence only makes it louder
Crying without tears is a common practice in the 21st century
Having tears empties the soul
Having no tears paralyses the soul and
Makes us numb in the face of many circumstances
Crying without tears will often
Allow you to go through the motions
This stream of passivity
Will cause you to be blind to your destiny
Crying without tears is a common practice in the 21st century
Having tears empties the soul
Having no tears paralyses the soul and
Makes us numb in the face of many circumstances
Let’s break free
Mark Frank
Copyright 2022
He put the shovel in the earth
With dry eyed dread he shakes his head
He's not a man to show emotion
He'll do the job, dig up ground
go through the motions, build up the mound
before the evening sun goes down.
His wife and son are standing by
While clouds swell up and tears are cried
that stem from grief they cannot hide
....
They stand aside, and he begins
Beside him in the crate, homemade,
so carefully the dog was laid.
Old "Oliver", was his best friend
but this is where that story ends.
Love came to them, from who knows where
and with it came a million woes
of muddy paws and ticks and fleas
of broken screens, and mother's screams
of slippers torn, and growing pains
And a love like no one understands
until they've known this kind, unplanned.
Concealed are tears he will not shed
He's not a man to show his pain
He motions them to come, and bring
a worn-out shoe, a toy or two
to lay within the disturbed ground
And then beneath the chestnut tree
He puts the crate into the grave
Then shovels in the dirt again…
They walk away, and the sun goes down,
without a word, without a sound
Sometimes such silence has a thousand words to say
_____________________________________________________
8/9/16
For Contest: "Camouflage Me A Poem"
Sponsor: Broken Wings
(A high school poem from just before the Corona-apocalypse)
In this beautiful place of worship the pews are padded but uncomfortable and the large sanctuary is cold.
There's a huge glass dome and I can see the stars. Are the stars our fiery heaven??
No, I don't think the stars care about us - they don't burn with affection or passion. And if the stars weren't there we could live with an empty sky.
The Greeks would call our star, the Sun, to perform their acts of God. I imagine most of their prayers went unanswered - not unlike our own??
If Jesus, the son of God, and that whole story were the deepest reality then why hasn't Jesus returned??
imagining heaven's father and son dialog
God: "Ok, Jesus, time to go back.."
Jesus: "Go back... go back?? Daaaaad... Did you see what they did to me???.. nailed me to a cross; screw them there's no way I'm going back. Why don’t you try going back as an ordinary man - maybe they’ll set you on fire.”
These 20 millennium old bible stories aren't exactly Euclid's logical system. I mean, the various Bible books aren't even consistent. Are these really, I mean really our beliefs? Or are they just kind of traditions and good rules to live by?
My parents - unlikely pilgrims of the intoxicating poetry of belief - face front and appear to be listening... in all other things they're so skeptical - it's a puzzle.
If Jesus did come back, wouldn't he practically be a caveman surrounded by bewildering technology?
I'm sorry, There's something too rich in creation for these rehearsed responses and fairy-tale fragments from a primitive world to be the answer.
Now I'm not saying there is no God or no life after death.. I.. just.. hopeless shrug
So, anyway - I go through the motions, I chant the litanies with the enthusiasm of obedience; just storing up my spiritual loot and hiding my questioning, heathen heart.
.
.
A song for this:
decide to be happy by MisterWives
We became blind to His love for us
Failing to honor Him in our worship
His choices now offend us
And our offerings now offend Him
Our hearts refuse to take Him in
So, we go through the motions
For the appearance of respectability
We are hypocrites
Asking Him for His blessing
While dishonoring His name
We have turned back from following Him
Our speech becomes ever more sinful
Showing partiality in His instructions
Showing lack of influence by the Spirit
We are disillusioned
Accusing Him of injustice
Because the wicked are prospering
While our own service to Him is unprofitable
So, we withhold from Him
And become more self-assertive
Dealing treacherously with each other
We are lacking spiritual kinship
Yet, it's because of His justice
We still have space to repent
To return to Him and regain His blessing
To avoid the curse and coming judgment
He will send Elijah before that Day
To break the stalemate
Taking a moment to reflect on the past,
Bringing forth love and forgiveness at last,
The choice is ultimately yours to choose,
In this case, He can only show you the right thing to do,
The difference is this is really not from the old,
What was written then before Jesus was born,
Some stories of old showing what not to do,
Before what was known better, before the new,
One brother not knowing whom the other was,
Until our God brought forth the love of his Son,
God took the calamity and set it straight,
Jesus changed their perspectives to love the right way,
To be stuck in the old only focused on can't,
With limited eyesight they could not see born again,
When the story of old comes to an end,
The new can break free to love again,
It was never a waste to go through the motions,
Because it changes our hearts not to go on a notion,
Fear can hold us away from who God made us to be,
Until Jesus came back to set our hearts free,
This time around we won't forget each others faces,
For God's love will overpower and ultimately replaces.