Give me a task Great Aunt Gladys said. I can crochet anything at all.
She had been a braggart since before she could stand tall.
We asked her to crochet a tire swing, which she did.
Another task, she begged me and my cousin Sid.
Sid told her to crochet a pie. Blueberry? Was her ask.
She did it too, it was a gorgeous answer to this task.
I thought I would be tough. Can you make a strawberry plant?
Within a day and a half, she had made one, she was a great aunt!
in the worst shape ever
my great Aunt Heather
usually under the weather
good thoughts? Never.
Resigned to gloom forever.
no joy and not clever.
Focuses on bad news and weather.
I am sorry for Aunt Heather.
Great Aunt Ada
not thought of her for years
she made me laugh
till I cried real tears
fascinated by her talk
never wanting her to go
her every sentence finished
with like and that you know
hidden under the table
her delicious visiting days
mentally counting
each use of her phrase
as she gossiped away
about him and her and so and so
just general village chat
like and that you know
hands over mouth
trying not to laugh aloud
as she chatted away
about the village crowd
such a nice old lady
with a conversational flow
and to emphasise each point
her like and that you know
I don't know why
she came back to mind
I reminisce a lot
these days I find
a horrible child
I hope she didn't know
how I writhed with joy
like and that you know
Great Aunt Maude had a bejeweled flair
With red and blue rhinestones in her hair
Black fluffy coat resembling grizzly bear
We could never outguess what she would wear
Her glitzy outfits were worn with care
Silver sequined gowns, shoulders often bare
She entices old men on the town square
All could easily be lured to her lair.
Other ensembles could never compare
Her collars glistening with fluffy hare
Other women enjoy newest cookware
Great Aunt Maude dressed exotic as Cher
Great Aunt Edda was super friendly when I first arrived.
Hugging and kissing me, holding me a bit too long.
I was pushing away, because her perfume was overwhelming.
I could not breathe, thought I would die in a coma of smelly old woman.
She held tight, with the grip of an alligator’s jaw.
When we got home, I begged my mother to never take me back
She discounted my concerns; Aunt Edda was her favorite aunt.
God heard me though; she passed away in her sleep that night.
She opened her cantankerous mouth and out came the truth
There was nothing not honest about my clever Aunt Ruth
The whats-its and fruts-its were scared of her though.
Especially terrified that she was way off in the know.
She would not hesitate to give her opinions on zebras and milk.
Her ideas were her own, and they did not come out smooth as silk.
She was a big believer in herself, no matter what the whats-its said.
Fruts-its were terrified of her; she had somehow stunned one of them dead.
I said Great Aunt Ruth, why do you always say what you mean?
Why ever would you ask such a silly thing, my nephew, kidney bean?
I mean, what if you offend people, marching your mouth off that way?
It’s me I have to please she told me. I need to be happy at the end of day.
So I followed her around and watched the other relatives look pleased.
They loved it that she confused others. Some cried, bawled, hid, and sneezed.
You either love her or hate her, but she always lives her own fabulous truth!
You have to love someone as self-confident and loud as your lovely Aunt Ruth!
She was the bawdiest gal, they said.
Her eyes were green, her hair was red.
There were rumors of course
She rode nude on her pet horse
But we never knew her, for she was long dead.
You’re luckier for it, they told me.
She lived to be age eighty-three
She had a hankering
For all kinds of pankering
She was my Great-Aunt Norma Bea
My Great Great Aunt Prissy had a magical dog.
She never needed friends but she did have a blog.
Her acquaintances were thrilled with her pix
Of a talking dog with costumes so thick
She would put hilarious captions under the blog
Stating the words came from her magical dog
A border collie with a mad sense of humor
We all laughed, thinking she had a brain tumor
My Great Great Aunt Prissy made her dog famous.
When she passed we fought over who got her dog Amos
By then he was up to six million hits every day
Advertisers were eager to throw money his way
I drew the long straw and took Amos home gladly
He was mouthy, a diva, and spoke his voice gladly.
A magical dog loving his own fans and gobs of hype
He is standing over me now watching me type
Criticizing my English, correcting my grammar.
Laughing at my mistakes in a belligerent manner.
Great Aunt Prissy’s sassy confident magical dog
No longer has a following, friends or a blog.
Sometimes my Aunt and Uncle would visit us
I guess my Aunt was close to four hundred pounds
If you care about staying in this old world
Try not to be in her seat when she sits down!
I knew that she'd be there when I got out of school
When home I said, "Look Auntie at this A I got!"
She said, "Butter my butt and call me a biscuit"
That unsettling image still haunts me a lot!
All my air came out when she gave me a hug
And then I might have tried to run away
But with both my feet so far off the ground
There just wasn't much I could do or say!
When put down, I turned red and ran away
I hope she didn't think me heartless or cold
You might say a kid should be used to that
But at the time I was Seventeen years old!
I just found out
that I'm a great aunt,
he was born just yesterday
I need to see him, that's all I want.
I haven't met him yet
he's two months premature,
I hope to have him in my life
with friends and family, he'll truly endure.
I can't wait to hold him
in my loving arms,
I hope when he grows up
he'll be filled with great charm.
I wish nothing but the best
for this baby boy,
I hope he fills everyone's heart
with tenderness and pure joy.
Copyright Cynthia Jones
Feb.26/2016
Hopefully, I can go to see him tonight. His name is Liam.
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