Gaseous Poems


Premium MemberGaseous Poop Blow

Smiting spread of gaseous explosion blow
He sprayed baby cologne with fresh mint glow
As classmates guessed puzzling scent
Poop came out as toilet-sent…
Then he blurted, “Thanks* God for freedom flow!”

1Thessalonians 5:18 *In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.

June 25, 2023
2nd place, "POOP" Limerick Poetry Writing Contest
Sponsored by JAN ALLISON; judged on 7/4/2023.
Categories: gaseous, appreciation, blessing, child, christian,
Form: Limerick

Premium MemberGaseous

Don't drink the pickle juice
for your caboose will cut loose
Beans indeed will make you toot
really are the magical fruit
Cabbage can be savage
for the air it will ravage
Open the window on burrito night
don't strike a match for a light
Eating kimchi a Korean treat
from your bottom sounds will tweet
To many raw vegetables and leafy greens
will release gases the smell obscene
Go ahead eat those foods all you can
but go outside and toot down wind
Categories: gaseous, fun, funny, humorous, silly,
Form: Rhyme


Gaseous Squeaks

I heard the echoes of each gassy squeak
Held my breath when I sniffed his stinky leak
He let out a few more
So I ran for the door
Before his toots made the entire room reek

Others came out, while pinching their noses
His flatulence poured out like fire hoses
Oh, what a horrid smell
Worse than rotten egg shell
And can't be cloaked by the scent of roses

Woe to the innocent who are around
When his odiferous vapors abound
Just get ready to run
When the son of a gun
Cuts one loose with a squeaky little sound



September 24, 2021
Fart-Tastic Poetry Contest
Sponsor: Chantelle Anne Cooke
******************
Categories: gaseous, humor,
Form: Limerick

Premium MemberGaseous Dreams

Gaseous Escape

Just give me,
nitrous oxide.
so I can dream. 
said the Insomniac.
Categories: gaseous, anxiety, desire, peace, voyage,
Form: Free verse

Premium MemberLoad Gaseous Emisions

As I ascend the stairs to my waiting boudoir
I expel these loud gaseous emissions just like a car
Is it the rarefied atmosphere
More likely what I ate I do fear
Must lay off the beans, it smells like an abattoir
Categories: gaseous, humorous,
Form: Limerick


Gaseous Shout

stomach gas says nothing can compel me 
                   until i do myself out there from a challenge i will see                            
                          cough replies i will change your name in out 
                       so with pressure given whooping without doubt 
                  fart became its name of gaseous shout smell of debris
Categories: gaseous, funny,
Form: Limerick

Premium MemberLoud Gaseous Emissions

As I ascend the stairs to my waiting boudoir
I expel these loud gaseous emissions just like a car
Is it the rarefied atmosphere
More likely what I eat I fear
Must lay off the beans, it smells like an abattoir


© Jack Ellison 2015
Categories: gaseous, humorous,
Form: Limerick

Premium MemberGaseous Moon

There was a moon man from Titan
Who out gased who ever he was fightin'
When his eyes saw red
He blew off his head
And anyone near him was lightnin'
Categories: gaseous, funny, imagination
Form: Limerick
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