Funny Farm Poems

Funny farm or loony bin?
Depends what kind of mood I’m in
Mad house increases my lunacy
I take my pills and watch tv

Fall asleep, don’t care if...

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Mother let out a sneeze in the henhouse again
Out of every opening flew a squawking hen
From the drama
Came my mama
Basket of eggs feathers in hair...

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Old Steve was a marvelous kitty
But what happened to Steve was a pity
He was born in a barn
On a twelve-acre farm
His career was chasing the...

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Nibbling carrots strung from sticks
Jacks Hee Haw is heard for miles
He often shows off all his tricks
When he does there's lots of smiles.
These are the...

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Me and my chicken 
Won't take a lickin'
Whenever he crows
Everyone knows it's
Me and my chicken.

Me and my chicken
Our hearts are tickin'
Cluckin' and pickin'
Here in the...

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the spider rode the horse
the horse he rode as a rider

the cow had wondered how
the sheep was still asleep

the worm then rode the horse
the horse...

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There once was a farmer named Larry
With a hundred cows at his dairy
Larry did his best
Hired help for the rest
Milking that many cows was scary
...

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As soon as we got to the county fair
The country odor got through my nose hair
Coz above some milk pails
We encountered cow tails
Which filled our...

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My first sleepover
was when I was almost eight,
camping with my friend.
Our tent wasn't store-bought,
just a tarp wrapped around some
stacked-up bails of straw.

We lived on a...

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I am a cow 
Of course most of you reading this are also cows
But I have heard a rumor that those creatures
Who walk on two...

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A mass of emerald and ochre leaves,
sway upon the light summer breeze.

Suction of boots to big, wrenched from the muck,
grunting, banging, the metal bucket thunks.

The...

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This ‘moving to the country’ is getting out of hand
The city has it all, where supply meets demand
Each block has a deli
Enough to fill a...

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Poised on a farm in Carolina
Not labeling yields “made in China”
There lived a cow and goat
With milk they couldn’t promote
Because their best milk caused angina




Funny,...

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I was with them in gardens 
                    Planting some vegetables.
              ...

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It burned up our best corn field
Now we've no crops this year to yield
Peculiar, it was never set ablaze

Yesterday they were fully intact
Perhaps an extraterrestrial...

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