what's wrong with people?
it happened on a friday afternoon,
when i crashed through the gates of our compound
and saw my wife and son walking along the pathway
and i turned the corner
and hurdled over the speedbumps
to beat them to the front door
i reversed into the driveway
as they appeared from around the bend
walking with pace towards our house
i parked and proceeded to slowly
open the driver-side window
as they stood on the steps before the door
and at full volume came Largo al factotum
Figaro here, Figaro there,
Figaro up, Figaro down.
i looked at my wife expressionless.
my wife looked at me,
and proceeded to lead our son inside.
He drew the drapes, nothing caught his eye
it seemed that yesterday had replicated itself,
only today it had chosen a deeper of gray tint.
On balance, it could have been
the color of stale puke, for the night
had up-chucked its darkness into a
sickly yellow
morning bucket of bile.
Examining his mind, he ascertained by
the laborious task of magnifying
the inconsequential
that he was not clinically depressed
just bored.
Later that day he bought a black puppy,
to remind himself that he was apparently
no longer the center of the universe,
a position he had held
to be inviolate until now.
The demotion was irksome.
He took the French Bulldog to Walmart,
claiming loudly that it was a service animal
for he had need of a dumb friend.
His new dumb friend peed on him
in the candy aisle
and generally acted like it was the center
of the universe, a notion reinforced
by its many casual admirers.
That dog was having a great day,
and by the next day he felt it was quite acceptable
to be its little helper and general factotum,
for it absolutely beats
trying to play God 7 days a week
and no day of rest.
Mercurial
authoritarian lead style
heterodox
person
or
group
holds
lightning rod
for
criticism
from
old-fashioned
readership
FACTOTUM
works
tirelessly
glossed
as "do all!"
with
force
behind
command
refers
to
handy
versatile
sort
of
assistance
Written: March 21, 2023
Inside an archaic framework
she fetches a pail from the fields,
the bucket on her hip is full of
broken eagles.
Wind turbines churn in the distance.
He takes the mangled birds
plucks them,
puts their heads on poles
loads them onto a flatbed.
His dour darling fixes fixings
with a rusting air-fryer;
plaits her hair with chicken wire.
Drones mourn like doves in the evening.
Rattling pods spread
their dry seeds over abandoned crops.
Bald feathers flap on
a black-booted scarecrow.
A morbid factotum arrives
deposits clods of earth
from out the back of
of a fly-specked hearse.
Horse heads turn
on a squeaking wind vane.
Inside a slow burning barn
Unstrung fiddles lay at rest
in their open coffins.
JACK OF ALL CARDS??
Factotum polymath of a soul,
here's the one that has it all
yet a comprehensive sciolist still stand tall.
Jack of clubs??:
Lack two-thirds
but still ride against all odds,
as an odd, joins class of gods.
Jack of diamonds??:
Strengthens our bonds,
our jewelry glitters as our studs,
not all that glitters is gold.
Jack of hearts??:
Tactical winner-breaker of hearts
even without being caught in the act,
Says "flattery artilleries are my Arts".
Jack of spades??:
Goal-digger with no help or aids,
the home of jackasses is Hades,
till then, build legacy that never fades.
Vick Manuel Poetry {VMP}
Copyright © July, 2020.
THE HUNGER WITHIN
Deep within I feel this hunger
So eat, I must, and then no longer
Crave for food but grow much stronger
Make this hunger ease.
But the pangs; the pain, it lingers
Although I feast and lick my fingers
Food from all the kindly bringers
Won’t stop this hunger tease!
What to do I now must wonder
All the pantries I shall plunder
And if it be I make a blunder
Will this hunger cease?
[ O’ Cupid, ‘Help!’, you Love Factotum
Shout “ahoy, Nil Desperandum
You’ll starve no more, ad infinitum”
Quell this hunger, please! ]
True it be I have no lover
Just one I want, I want no other
If food be this there’s none above her
My hunger to appease!
(The Fg 81.5.8)
My name is Archie Templeton-Mead
I'm vice president of corporate greed,
gold, bonds and diamonds, are (in the main)
what I need, so please write a letter, you
couldn't do better than plant your small seed,
(avaricious indeed!)
with financial factotum Archie Templeton-Mead
If my behaviour is rude or objectionable.
What I need to learn to make it sustainable?
I studied surrealism and swathe me susceptible,
To concrete relations to develop surmountable,
But I temporize to learn your surreptitious gamble.
Then your religion adopted me a non religious,
And treated a birth distortion in human factitious,
Factotum a fait accompli not identifiable crush,
My soul is evil not a body needs purification by hydrous.
My kindness and forgiveness converted me a feeble.
But hypertension shows me your hygienic hyperbola,
To curse my appetite not your spare to gain Lola,
You feel cold and hot and used me to assemble cola,
How can I excuse my children remember your Bola?
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