The girls on the ranch all jumped for joy
when they learned that their boss would employ
a handsome buckaroo
and they dreamed they'd make do
like the song "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy"!
An old trail hand came upon a man,
His wagon was stuck in the mud.
He asked the man if he needed a hand,
He said thanks, my name's Delmar Crudd.
Well hello Crudd, I'm Benjamin Fudd,
I'm just your common Buckaroo.
I'll help you Crudd get out of the mud,
But you'll have to feed me when I do.
That sounds like a plan you old trail hand,
I'll take all the help I can get.
Once out of the mud I'll feed you Fudd,
We'll eat as soon as the table is set.
With a push and shove and help from above,
Crudds wagon was finally free.
Once the table was set, Fudd finally ett;
And rode off to the West towards the sea.
Then on the next day and well on his way,
Fudd came across a man with three wives.
Shared his water with wives, sons, and daughter,
The man said thanks, you just saved our lives.
We'd like to feed you and if you need to,
You can dally with one of my wives.
Said I'm a Mormon, named Edgar Norman,
I live by making and sharpening knives.
After he fed, Eds wife joined him in bed,
Oh what a night for Benjamin Fudd!
You can make a bet, he'll never forget,
Fudd was fed better by Ed than by Crudd.
I strolled through the local cemetery the other day
And here are some epitaphs I observed along the way:
Cletus O'Toole lies herein
Too much boozing done him in!
Here lies a gambler molding in his crypt
Odds are he was shot by a chump he had gyped!
His spouse spotted him leaving a house of ill repute
In short order she done him in during a heated dispute!
Clyde raced down the mountain and failed to swerve
Meeting his doom on an S-shaped curve!
His plea to the judge was ruled to be moot
He was sentenced to hang for fencing some loot!
Buckaroo Bob was throwed from his horse
And was buried with his boots on as a matter of course!
The town ruffian was our late friend Keith
He met his match and was interred sans his teeth!
Pilot Pete's final radio message was, "Oh! Shoot!"
Seems he forgot to don his parachute!
Farrier Fred was a premier cobbler as a general rule
Alas, he was kicked in the head by an unruly mule!
Butcher Bruce was expert at wielding his knife
But in a fatal spat he was out-wielded by his wife!
POTD 24 June 2021
On the dry Prairie and then Mississippi Valley, yahoo buckaroo;
I come out eating choking dust daily, yahoo;
While on the long open range;
This cattle drive I parade;
Moo-be then dar doggies;
Through open Plains and Gulfs in Valley range;
Yippee ki-yay, Yahoo buckaroo doggies;
Got a rope and a horse, hey flowing mange!
Also got a sixth barrel caliber Bang Bang git them bandits;
I ain't going to be in shooting unless it's in self-defense;
Because this keeps me saved me from them Outlaws those dirty varmints;
That corn whiskey on my breath;
I'm a self-proclaimed cowboy;
I'm not afraid of this life or death;
And one day I'm going to be a big-time Lariat Oh, boy;
Screaming yippee ki-yay Yahoo buckaroo wooh!
From the range to the rodeo this is where I'm going to go;
I am a cowboy
1/19/21
Cowboy Poetry Poetry Contest
Rhyme poetry form only.
Sponsored by: Line Gauthier
Buckaroos wave in the wagons into a corral, circle of
Conestoga wagons mixed with covered wagons 100 count,
Next to the butte, a springer delivers calf alive; compadres cheer wahoo!
Exuberance looking at large remuda, choosing each a horse to mount.
Morning sun illuminates camp as mozo helps secure on a horse the rig,
Saddle up with aparejo and alforja to work on the range, the keen
Vaqueros mill the running cattle into a circle, and bulldog the doggie
Pulling down the calf to avoid the barranca deep ravine.
Noontime hot sun heats frijoles, huevos rancheros, and beef or lunch,
Cowboys drift cattle slowly ranch side, buckaroo pulls in the doggie stray calf,
Moving away from the coulee ravine towards the crick,
Dragonflies zoom near as waddys punch cattle herding,
resounding a hooray laugh.
Evening warm summer sun lights adobe viga roof beam end rustic,
Acequia irrigation canal greens the bolson flat arid valley,
Olla earthenware pot full of water complement hoedown and dinner,
Ramada shelter branches on roof give rest to camp, peaceful tally.
About this new priest need to discus,
He sure has become an added plus
And after name,
Was his game;
Whole church started raising a fuss.
Looked like new priest had a loose tooth;
Had been giving sermons from a booth
Was bold;
Truth told;
We heard was about the book of Ruth
We will book a plane after reading
book of Ruth. We liked the way
that she would look but had
heard she is a lousy cook.
Could you be a buckaroo
who read the Book of Ruth.
Be one who her once knew.
Have to be careful when mentioning
knew a few and new dress she did
wear had a tare and was the one
which was blue.
About Ruth they had written a book;
Had heard her husband was a crook;
They indicated,
Was implicated;
Trump came out of it when we shook.
While we were working around the clock,
Trump again left us in a state of shock
Wound his watch,
And he did botch;
Would block and never let roster cock.
A cat sat on a buckaroo hat
A hat that was not a hat
but a Flying Fox bat,
A bat like a hat
that was not a bat
but a Spacecraft
from the planet Cobalt…
Can you just picture that?
This story is as simple as that,
A Spacecraft like a bat
Slick, smooth and flat
with a cockpit and all that
and a cat from the planet cobalt
in an outer space, as far as that…
There’s more to it than that.
While chasing an alien Rogue Rat
in and around the galaxy and all that,
Cat Cobalt in the outer space got lost
in the rat’s extraterrestrial habitat…
Now, what’s up with that?
Here and there, with this and that
From beyond yonder just like that
Poor Cat Cobalt on our Earth fell flat,
No ceremony and no welcoming mat…
Oh, who would ever want that?
To get back home this resilient cat
with one purpose alone and that’s that
He rebuilds the broken Spacecraft
with the help of one domestic cat
and goes back home to Planet Cobalt
Now no one knows where it’s at…
This ends the tale of the Cobalt cat!
~08/01/18
~"Cat Poems" contest by Tania Kitchin
little buckaroo —
astride a counterfeit horse
pulling back the reins
7/18/2018
Born to ride in mesquite
Bonded to sage and sand
Bound to love and lose her
But that's a common thing
Busted bones ain't rare ones
Broken hearts ain't either
Beware, the blonde does both
August, 2016
For Contest Pleiades B
I've got this awesome idea
To write the greatest of poems
It'll start out nice and easy
Then with a BANG make some noise
It will be widely read
In every coffeehouse in town
Soon to catch on like a wildfire
Then #1 with a bullet nation bound
Writing so amazing
It'll astound everyone
Why it might even get hired killers
To turn in their guns
It'll make the strong want to weep
And the weak to stand strong
There will be waves of applause
This poem will have it all going on
They'll beg me to let them use it
In a Presidential speech
Afterwards they'll fly it straight to the conflict
Where it'll bring peace to the Middle East
Finally coming to rest at the Smithsonian
Taking up it's rightful place
They may have to move that old Shuttle
To give my poem plenty of space
But before any of this can happen
Before it rings true, buckaroo
I suppose I should think up something special
And jot down a line, maybe two...
Thar was once an old buckaroo named Hank,
Who was very absent-minded and lank.
He told his hoss to skedaddle,
Fergittin' to mount the saddle.
'Twas not the first time old Hank drew a blank!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(c) 2015 All Rights Reserved
You keep giving me titles for limericks, you do
The Sanctum of Sinsations is the latest from you
Appreciate the help
It's really heart felt
A bunch of thanks, my friendly buckaroo
© Jack Ellison 2015
Mickey Mc Crew and Buckaroo Two cowboys of rowdy a draw
Rode up the town and tide them both down the horses next to the door
Dispute the cards saloon ajared poker of clubs a straight ace
A cheat on the board Royal flush a fraud a shoot out for all these old mates
Roll out to street the mud to a meet the ladies run for dear life
These men akin a gouge and spin mash up one another's poor face
Men apart and guns a dart the fear the eye and the watch
A tick a tock the new town's peoples clock and bullets fly in to the crotch
Poor men is them the undertaker send a tape up for six by two feet
The crowd pour out and scream and shout the sherriffs gone for you when
Carriage away the morgue one did say and bury beyond the bray hill
Down in the dust a hand lay out thrust 5 aces where one had just lay
I flat out nailed my first interview
Young and dumb without a clue
Then hired on the spot, no lying
Nervousness was my only crime
When suddenly his questions stopped
Damn it man, our eyes locked
I stood up in fear, my hand out
Ready to go home and just pout
His words were "your hired"
"I like the way your wired"
He shook my hand withe ease
Then we talked about the leads
I then asked him for an advance
Five hundred bucks, a slim chance
So when I left that interview
Holding five hundred buckaroo
I felt I had conquered the world
I drove home to kiss my girl
Caught every single green light
First time for everything, right?
Listen up, all you buckaroo Cassanovas and would be Romeos.
Let me tell you a secret not every cowboy knows.
To win a lady’s heart, you must always endeavor
to show her that you 'll love her and will cherish her forever.
Now you can fix broken things to show her how you’re handy
or bring her a dozen roses and expensive boxes of candy.
You can take her to dinner and try to be witty and clever,
but there’s a quicker, better way to win her heart forever.
Just buy the lady a horse because women love equines,
and a big fancy diamond ring that sparkles and shines.
This will create a bond she’ll not soon wish to sever,
cuz in a woman’s heart, horses and diamonds are forever.
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