Best Whine Poems
My heart I set on a dear companion
the cherished imprint on my soul, profound
how safe I felt in a tough kind bosom!
though I ceased to touch and see, tightly bound.
***
Sweet and pleasant, that huge effort and toil
no sign of a whine, a smiling mother
whims she would swallow, our feast wouldn't spoil
the feel of having her, like no other!
***
A glance at my eyes, she would read my heart
"ignore the pain, you have to dig your mine"
her persona, to me she would impart
how could I be without the whole of mine!
***
One tear of joy.. one other of woe
in time of grief, she had a bride to wed
her head bowing to what's to life a foe
I'm that one whose dad in wedding time dead.
***
No sign of a whine! her soul valiant
her words I retain, "I'm a woman of worth"!
how she longed for life! hers was transient
"recite me holy words.. I'm back to earth".
***
A companion when I recall, I learn
a woman, the world of books didn't know
of impressive drive, much she would discern
mother, the one I am, to you I owe.
Ammmazing how many blithering idiots
sip silently while from their
purpled tongue
horrors regurgitate...
a ripe bachus regurgitation
soured by the tilt
of goblet and the howling
incessant banter of
bartender
Blithering idiots who the hell
what the heck
geez my glass in almost empty
HERE maitre DEE
fancy BOY!
MerrrrrrrrrrLOW pllllllleeease!
get the damn ice away from me
that’s real cheesy
You know NO FOOL puts
ice in red wine
Yeah yeah…git a bottle
gimmee that cork I wantta
sniff it
YOU
BOY!!!
Clink? Clink where? WHAT?
oh fork YOU
Buddy whatzit mean
when ya drop a fork?
Bill HERE!
Pen? pen WHAT?
I don't need no damn pen
can't ya see
I'm writting
wid one?
You’re at the intersection in your car,
that damn device held pressed against your ear.
You’re unaware, but we know who you are:
the one away from whom we all will steer!
My class has barely started. Suddenly,
inside the room is heard the strangest sound.
You leave - or worse - you talk right over me.
Is there no place a cell phone can’t be found?
I’m at the movies. Bleep, bleep, bleeping bleep.
Another one. . . and music starts to play!
And then you start conversing? Why, you creep,
you’re begging just to “make somebody’s day.”
Just turn it off! You think we love your voice?
NO, Big Shot, we're just victims with no choice.
An oldie from July 31, 2011
Mom used to drink this wine for a tonic,
I had no idea she meant a colonic.
So I snuck some of this swill,
moved more than an EX LAX pill
cause the gas sounds were quite polyphonic!
Written 6/22/2011 for the ‘Bottle of Wine” contest
Since the bloody Battle of Hastings
When 'Arold got killed by French Bill
We've seen an endless invasion of French
And I've just about had my fill
Don't we have enough words of our own
In this wonderful language of ours?
- To seek and find le mot juste
Dunt take much linguistic power
It seems using French has been with us forever
Passed down as a fait accompli
Have we ever really tried to change that?
Or have we always said "C'est la vie"?
But, to think that some long-dead bon vivant
With a certain je ne sais quoi
Used his chic tour de force to put words in our mouths
To me, it's a shameful faux-pas
So, I think we need a tête-à-tête
To form a clique, to mount a coup
Working together, en masse, as a team
We'll swap "Bonsoir" for "How Do"
Then (haute couture) won't be setting the trend
We'll watch racing, not the Grand Prix
No more art nouveau, or cordon bleu
And say "Enjoy your meal", not "Bon appétit"
I never have the soup du jour
Prefer prawn cocktail to poncy pâté
And I'll sit in a coffee house or caff
But never go in a café
Some say I should let it go and relax
Say choice of words is all laissez-faire
But can I stay calm on this bête noire of mine?
No, mes amis ~ au-contraire!
At British Wimbledon let's use "40-all"
Instead of being at deuce
And what's wrong with nil instead of love
Or am I being obtuse?
I know that we'll get nowhere
I sense there's no going back
That it's like being stuck behind burning sheep
Trapped in a cul-de-sac
But I suppose that it is nice to share
Good ideas and a word or two
Like Liberté and Égalité
And that feeling of déjà vu
And with le weekend, le booking, le check-in, le spam
And countless more, I say with a grin
That when we look at our counter-invasion
Even the French agree that we win!
I despair when I’ve stepped in dog poo
Excrement on the sole of my shoe
It would be indiscreet
If I crapped in the street
I wish doggies would use a pooch loo!
I mowed the grass but now feel forlorn
I see cat poo all over my lawn
My neighbour’s pussy
Is so darn fussy ...
It's just my lawn that he treats with scorn!
Here’s my whine now pass the Cheese Contest
Sponsored by Phillip Garcia
08~01~16
It’s time to lounge and contemplate,
Allowing the crap to all hang out.
While full bowels disintegrate
The gas attacks, having to shout.
Relief is done gradually
And Cabernet eases the day,
Oh this wine, I tell you truly
Entices with its fine bouquet.
But the thing I hate most of all,
In a restroom away from home…
After cheese, hands reach for the wall,
Yet…there is nothing there but chrome!
Paper roll is gone, long been flushed,
My whining drains... my seat untouched!
Here’s My Whine, Now Pass The Cheese
Philip Garcia’s Contest
8/08/2016
Premenstrual syndrome my fault,
can’t bring her crying to a halt!
No cheese in the fridge,
she whines unabridged,
then nicely says “please pass the salt”.
Told me I’m no good for daddy,
I told her I’m not his caddie,
golf course vindictive,
please one sedative,
so I hit on his wife Patty!
I do leave the toilet seat down,
but sometimes the bowl is left brown,
not my fault I poop,
please go find a scoop,
thinks she deserves to wear a crown!
Still can’t believe she is my wife,
with all the bickering and strife,
find a man better,
an Irish Setter,
no more “happy wife, happy life!”
Here's My Whine, Now Pass the Cheese - Poetry Contest
Sponsor: Phillip Garcia
Syllable Count: 8-8-5-5-8
Date Written: August 13, 2016
My missus has a liking for those cheese and onion crisps,
the taste and the aroma she finds tricky to resist.
Yet oddly the real thing she simply will not eat
but me I find the real McCoy is just so hard to beat.
My favourite is Danish Blue but boy, she gives me hell
not just the weird appearance she cannot abide the smell.
You'd think that I could get away with something like a Gouda
but no, I find if anything her nagging just gets louder.
For Gorgonzola I am itching, but she just keeps right on bitchin'
and I get relegated along with the cats from out the kitchen.
Both our cats fancy some Edam, but she simply will not feed 'em
since the thought of touching it can make her shudder,
her distaste remains stolid over anything that's solid
if it started off in life inside an udder.
Things did come to a head half an hour before bed
my breath smelt of cheese, she was not impressed,
took a good swipe at my head, spilled my wine on me instead
you could say that I was now Chablis dressed.
I cannot understand, with my cheddar in my hand,
why she won't try it for once but anyhow,
I can still console myself as I put it on the shelf that she has one thing in common-
she's a cow.
For contest- Here's my whine now pass the cheese, sponsor Phillip Garcia
A slightly bruised Viv Wigley, with a plate of Camembert, August 2nd 2016
If red wine were not red, I
Would probably be a Jedi
I’d use the FORCE
With no remorse
Be that would Joda said I
illanelle: Whose voice so insistent and so early to whine
(I have just found a poem I wrote three days before I was tossed up
and knocked down by a speeding car while I was mid-way on a zebra-
crossing on an entry-road to a mosque. I had the right of way. The curious
thing was/is that I saw no car approaching from the right. The driver - a Tunisian in a hurry to pay his respects to Allah - did not, according to him, see me either. Curious! P.S. The car hit me right where there is a 30km speed limit signpost in front of a primary school, and the driver is still driving around in a postal services delivery van. Vive la France! Viva la Francia! The emasculation through isolation and the strangulation through noise nuisance continue unabated! The Brave New World! under Socialist management!)
Whose voice so insistent and so early to whine
Jabbering heads rap on the panes of my ears
Can howling winds meticulous eke out Nature's design
Last Exit to Brooklyn not by rote every line
Requiem for a Dream's stream of consciousness leers
Whose voice so insistent and so early to whine
Do my words madly rushing winds now entwine
Whose bones rattle in the shutters of my fears
Can howling winds meticulous eke out Nature's design
Does the magic fridge's realism pop pills divine
Make me look the svelte creature the world requires
Whose voice so insistent and so early to whine
The Algebra of Need's burning cold in my vein
Black dealer king's piston bursting through dry tears
Can howling winds meticulous eke out Nature's design
The gaping hunger in my soul sickens in my brine
Spoon-fed needlefuls bloat attention in dears
Whose voice so insistent and so early to whine
Can howling winds meticulous eke out Nature's design
(c) T. Wignesan, Paris – February 6, 2015
Oh, I love your raven lustrous silky hair
He used to say, touching it with such care
Now—strands clog the bath vanity
Why don’t you donate it for charity?
I give him my deepest pulverizing stare
Written on:08/02/2016
Contest:'Cheese and Whine' by Phillip Garcia
As I was eating some cheese the other day,
it reminded me of you, and the things you used to say.
After all, you had all the bragging rights...
because it was you who had won all the fights.
Now, when I sit here with my chins all sagging,
I can only remember those hours of your nagging.
I tried to get a word in here and there...
but then all I got was that inevitable stare.
Remember the time you said how I was so whiny,
You thought my diaper must be too tiny.
We left each other with all that passion...
In those days we knew it was all the fashion.
So now as I am eating this last piece of cheese I think...Cheeez,
I'm glad you're not here to make me say please.
No, I no longer have to hear you Whine,
As I pour myself another glass of wine.
Better still is now when I have some whine...
It's the one made from grapes and fresh off the vine.
Written: 7/31/16 (Really a work in progress)
The day without love's like a day without sunshine
It necessary for happiness both yours and mine
We can substitute stuff
But sure ain't enough
With that magical feeling, absolutely no reason to whine
© Jack Ellison 2015
OF HIS FOE HE SAID
" HIS DESTINY IS DETERMINED
BY THE EVALUATIONS OF HIS TASK'S!"
THE ANALYSIS OF BEING BEST, TO MANUVER
AND OUTWREST THE OPONNET!
THE DIMENSION GUAGED TO MEASURE
INHERENT IN CALULATING
THE REALIGMENTING ENDEAVOR!
THIS IS A POEM FOR THE LOVES OF MY LIFE. WITH LOVE YOUR DARLING FREIND! TO.....
GUS " RUMPALL STYLLSKIN" KALLIO: BOREK" BOSSY" SIMIT:" BIGHAND" "BIGHAND" OVA ESTRUS
REVANI CACIK KUMPIR:
: CANIS "LUPUS" FAMILARIS. "BE GOOD, AND DEVIL WILL CURSE YOU !"
ENTISAPATING WHAT HE'D SAY, DONE TO MAKE HIM LESSER, AND BORING ! BLA, BLA, BLA ! "BASSOON" MOONSONG, AND "SAME STRAP" NANNY, WISH YA'LL A HAPPY BIRTHDAY !