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Cheese and Whine

I despair when I’ve stepped in dog poo
Excrement on the sole of my shoe
It would be indiscreet
If I crapped in the street
I wish doggies would use a pooch loo!

I mowed the grass but now feel forlorn
I see cat poo all over my lawn
My neighbour’s pussy
Is so darn fussy ...
It's just my lawn that he treats with scorn!

Here’s my whine now pass the Cheese Contest
Sponsored by Phillip Garcia

08~01~16

Copyright © Jan Allison | Year Posted 2016

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Alexis Y. Date: 8/15/2016 11:53:00 AM Hi Jan, Lol! I'm glad you made the list. Congratulations on your winning write: -) Alexis Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/15/2016 12:26:00 PM Thanks Alexis:-) hugs Jan xx

Beautiful Scars Date: 8/15/2016 6:40:00 AM lollollol! This is great as always lady! Congrats on your placement :)-luloo Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/15/2016 9:59:00 AM Thanks Luloo:-) hugs Jan xx

Teddy Kimathi Date: 8/15/2016 6:07:00 AM Hahahaha..... Congrats Jan, for your placement with this humorous piece!! ;-) Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/15/2016 9:58:00 AM Thanks Teddy:-) hugs Jan xx

Phillip Garcia Date: 8/15/2016 2:01:00 AM This was so good! Tough placement - the word "cat" appearing hindered! More glorious poo from you, look forward to more. Thank you for submitting! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/15/2016 2:32:00 AM Thanks Phillip yet more poop from the queen of poop on poetry soup lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Judy Konos Date: 8/7/2016 9:39:00 AM How does this get any better? It doesn't! Spot On keep it up! Cheers! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/7/2016 2:50:00 PM I try to get away from poop Judy but it just flows from my pen lol:-) hugs jan xx

Stephen Pennell Date: 8/4/2016 7:04:00 AM what a poo poem lol :-) Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/4/2016 8:25:00 AM ha ha ha I'm the Queen of poop on poetry soup lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Maurice Rigoler Date: 8/3/2016 8:13:00 AM Haha! I've stepped in dog pooh more than I like to relate. Just as bad is when my dog finds it and rolls in it! / M Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/3/2016 2:47:00 PM Eww I don't know which is worse Maurice - but I guess its easier to wipe your shoe than bath the dog:-) hugs Jan xx

Paul Callus Date: 8/3/2016 2:27:00 AM You are so good with fun limericks, Jan! gl in the contest. hugs // paul Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/3/2016 6:54:00 AM Thanks Paul - this one was inspired by a poster I saw on a local authority van - they are trying to make people more aware of the problem with the dog mess. I have also entered the dog poop fairy poem in a local contest - not sure how it will be viewed by the literary bards on the Island lol:-) hugs Jan xx

CayCay Jennings Date: 8/2/2016 11:07:00 PM You never disappointment, spot on write, spot off, too! Oh, you do lift my joy level. Nothing crappy or smelly about this entry, it should do do well. All the best, all the days ... CayCay Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/3/2016 6:53:00 AM LOL CayCay I should steer away from poop poetry - but like diarrhea it just flows lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Viv Wigley Date: 8/2/2016 12:43:00 AM I bet that you felt a right chump when you found that you'd trod in it's dump it wouldn't be funny with doo-doo that's runny much better when dump is a lump. Fun write, Jan, hope you're well, Viv x Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/2/2016 3:16:00 AM Its so irritating that people don't clear up after their pooch and when I see little bags hanging from railings when we walk especially down by the airport - arghhhhhhhhhh. Am fine thanks hope you are too:-) hugs Jan xx

James Peranteau Date: 8/1/2016 11:13:00 PM Funny, yet you have certainly struck the nervous cord with me dear poet...the neighbor's literally walk the pooches to my lawn to empty their bowl's... How 'bout their own property....oops...sorry, I'm ranting...wonderful to read you after such the long gone of I...have a wonderful week Jan...much love, james Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/2/2016 3:14:00 AM Welcome back to soup James glad you enjoyed my poem about poop - I've not changed lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Connie Marcum Wong Date: 8/1/2016 10:46:00 PM I know this will do well Jan. I don't know how you come up with all the wonderful limericks. ; ) Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/2/2016 3:13:00 AM I love writing the form Connie I guess its the humour that does it ... I have since found that my aunt and uncle both wrote poetry and they loved to write limericks, I discovered my mum wrote poetry too but she never shared it with us :-( hugs jan xx

Jean Murray Date: 8/1/2016 5:31:00 PM Wonderful as always Jan. Good luck. Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/1/2016 5:44:00 PM Thanks Jean - i can't get away from poop poems lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Arthur Vaso Date: 8/1/2016 5:28:00 PM Soup Mail, I want to whine and cheese! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/1/2016 5:31:00 PM Better off drinking the wine and leave me to write cheesy peoms lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Arthur Vaso Date: 8/1/2016 5:28:00 PM Great hilarious write! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/1/2016 5:30:00 PM Another poopy poem but hey I am known for scatological writes lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Andrea Dietrich Date: 8/1/2016 4:13:00 PM HA!!! A good one, Jan. I especially liked that first one. and it was great that you used spelling over rhyme for pussy and fussy!! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/1/2016 4:18:00 PM The first one is my favourite too lol:-) hugs jan xx

Mike Hauser Date: 8/1/2016 2:43:00 PM Lol! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/1/2016 2:44:00 PM :-) hugs Jan xx

Mark Woods Date: 8/1/2016 1:20:00 PM Cat crap on the lawn is my personal annoyance. Dry hot summer day and lawn mower equal instant poop dust with a fragrance that permeates the skin. Yuck yuck yuck. I digress, best of luck in contest! : ) Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/1/2016 1:33:00 PM LOL Mark I can imagine that really is a bummer :-) hugs Jan xxx

Tim Smith Date: 8/1/2016 12:27:00 PM Lol...watch your step Jan Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/1/2016 1:32:00 PM ha ha ha Tim:-) hugs Jan xx

Joe Dimino Date: 8/1/2016 12:14:00 PM Look at it as fertilizer...sort of food for the next delightful poem. Love it! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/1/2016 1:32:00 PM ha ha ha Joe:-) hugs Jan xx

Madhupriya Shanmugam Date: 8/1/2016 10:26:00 AM nice thought Jan;) Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/1/2016 10:52:00 AM Thanks Madhupriya:-) hugs Jan xx

Anne-Lise Andresen Date: 8/1/2016 8:44:00 AM - "My neighbor's pussy" ...... translated into Norwegian it will mean something completely different :)) - Good luck in the contest, Jan - hugs // Anne-Lise :) Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 8/1/2016 9:14:00 AM LOL Anne Lise ha ha ha:-) hugs jan xx