Best Vogon Poetry

Hotwired the orgasmatron
headed out on sixty-nine
know there’s nothin up ahead
and even less behind.
Pagination, pixilation
nothing seems to work
maybe just  I’m gettin old
maybe just a jerk
off...

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sniggle snarp to the i flee
frumple fram to me and ye

hearts a croom and eyes a breen
word from mouthy to me queen...

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Christmas day on planet E
each pine tree
deliciously planted
uprooted

the sky is tinsillated, stars replaced by screwy bulbs

and to top it all off – mind you, like...

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The days so few and far and in-between,
Loneliness I never knew has captured my soul,
The sweet smell of her hair I remember so well,
But even...

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Flammer Me Gimbels #42
(a Vogon Pirate poem)

Flammer me gimbels, me trimbels and dromies,
Whenceforth I caminal scrabbit thy foamies.
Jeerbo or Jabox, ex labbit. Ex findle
Will not...

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The rimpledeeduggs klacklety splatt britly floaming,
Ere flamping drakkurz snazzle at elvitty gloaming;
Yon jamweezy wudderslimps gamwracks smotly crawling,
Hoytaling pagartrimps flotlessly wrothful in bawling!

Beete stell ere yethle...

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Grunttenly I fretted the krakening;
Asthe ship dawns the horizon;
Burtworthy emplosions grafting;
Microrations gobblestone variants;
Up holding yon populats;
Ole!! thy fellows freddled Vogonian;
Banquish thessalonian squall;

4/20/19
written words by James...

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Myself! 

I love myself, 
I know myself, 
I acknowledge myself, 
I accept myself, 
I am myself. 

Myself, myself, myself.
I do love you : myself.
Always always...

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NEWS FLASH

get a load of this
utah backward is a sneeze
forgive me utes, please

Dave Austin...

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Vogon Love Poem attempt NO. 1

I lay here alpaisd
my ugataala resting on your terangela
held captive
by your radiant pherisloosums
listening to you kyrroud rhythmical snrootum
dmyeluc of loocatagle
if...

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I will not play this for the rest of my days
Their is nothing to gain
All done in vain
You got what you came for
I know who...

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Migel your habs cruggled to a stone
                  ...

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Everybody got a Hollywood life story
to tell
More meat on the bone
give juicier bites 
to sell
Nobody ever turns in a tarnished silver screenplay
Those warts and mistakes
get...

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The beat of the music is knocking from the radio.
It tries to enter her subconscious but the door there won't open. 
She has to finish...

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I wrote alit from the mine
the turkey not a mind
of digging the best out of a hole
to get the liver the heart and the neck
and...

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