Best Not A Poem Poems
-THIS IS NOT A POEM-
Hey, Poets stop by, give me a shout out.
Tell Me Where You Are From;)
I promise I won't show up on your doorstep.
If you are having a bad day, let me have it
If you have awesome news, don't be greedy
---SHARE! SHARE!
By all means --- SHARE THE NEWS!!!
................. LOVE THE POET DESTROYER
#1
Put the toilet seat down.
What woman wants to end up falling into the toilet in the middle of the night?
#2
Stop changing the channel.
Believe me guys, when women are trying to watch a soap opera, you best leave the remote alone.
#3
Put your own dirty clothes in the laundry.
I hate picking up crusty socks.
#4
Stop farting at the table.
Do you mind? I'm trying to eat.
#5
Excuse yourself when you burp.
And they say our children have to have manners.
#6
Roll your own damn cigarette.
When was the last time you rolled me one?
#7
Clean your messes up.
Trust me guys, you're a bunch of slobs.
#8
Don't call me stupid.
We women are just as smart, if not smarter than you are.
#9
Move out of my way.
When a woman is trying to get something done, the man always stands in the middle of the room.
#10
Turn the music down.
I know you guys love your music loud, but sheesh!
#11
Get out!
The least you guys could do is give us a little privacy in the bathroom.
#12
Do it yourself.
I'm sure you guys are smart enough to do things on your own.
#13
Get it yourself.
Guys, get your lazy, fat butts off the couch and make your own sandwich.
#14
Use your manners.
We don't like being told what to do without a simple please and thank you.
#15
Take your boots off at the door.
Women hate it when men carry dirt into the house after just cleaning the floors.
#16
Shut up!
When we are trying to watch a movie, that means we are trying to hear it too.
Copyright © Cynthia Jones
Sept.24/2004
I know some of these sound mean. No offense guys.
Weak-dei is a day following immediately after a Sick Day
Shun-dei is a day when a person just wants to stay in bed
Moan-dei is a day to complain about what work needs be done
T’ewes-dei is a day a person feels sheepishly
Wins-dei is the day someone becomes lucky in the lottery
Thirst-dei is the day many alcoholics suffer from
Fry-dei is a day when workers are ‘burnt out’ with the job
Scatter-dei is a day when volunteers are needed and everyone becomes scarce
Ben Ehlong-Dei is an alias people often use after all, or part, of a 24 hour period of time filled
with unpleasantness or boredom
Hey everyone!
So I'm not a Premium Member so I can't post a blog (otherwise I would). But I just wanted to say, I apologize for my year-long absence. I know that's kind of extreme, but please just know that life gets in the way sometimes; we get busy and get writer's block on occasion.
But to add to the drama, just today our landlord gave us three months notice on the house to move out, and move to a new place. This was unexpected for me, especially since I've lived in this house most of my life (15 years to be exact) ... so I don't know what's going to happen!! If you don't see me on the Soup for several days in a row this is probably why. I'll try to keep in touch as much as I can ... bad timing, I know, since I just recently came back!
(my family is seriously thinking about moving to Georgia ... I live in Idaho!!)
I hope that I can still pop in, read some work, and post a poem on occasion ... but it won't be as frequently as I have been doing, until we finally get settled in, and figure out what exactly we're doing.
Thanks for reading this, being tremendous friends, and writing stellar poetry. I appreciate you all.
P.S. This is not goodbye. I will not be leaving for a year like last time! In fact you will probably still see me pop up ... but I'm posting this up so that no one worries if I'm gone for several days in a row...
Peace!
I look at a pile of books bringing the memories of my past libraries
as a child only comics from the kid next door
that I will cut and paste to make my own adventures
the paste made of flour and water strong enough to fly a kite on windy days
the schtroumph preserved in a school book for me to see
in later years by his mother
never read a story by my mom she will sing to me as I watched her knit
removed on a farm in later times I opened an armoire
to open a book and discover the pleasure of words
and begged my uncle on a visit to buy me more
going to the village next to the hamlet I chose my first book
la guerre du feu
and so it goes back in the projects of Paris the serie noir of my mother
bringing me to crimes murder and deceptions was a lot of fun
as my sister trash magazines will nourish me with lush
exile to America with no english i was back to the comics
on Bleeker street the freak brothers a dream with the frieze at the bottom
telling the story of opening a bathroom door for the critter to disappear
and a first joint
putting my hands on short stories I read them all and went for more
my biggest library is making our noises hiding behind the lions
as we put our bicycle at rest at the bottom of the stairs on a dark night
and the rest is my own to tell as words become nonsense
as the manes have nothing to do with books
but the lions roar if you learn nothing
a walk through the organ pipe
cactus fields along
a contentious boundary
a place called Mexico on one side,
a collection of semi-independent States
on the other
Barrels of water with spigots
preaching survival
placed at intervals by
good samaritans
hoards of armed guards
roving in every mechanized
contraption imaginable
illegal immigrant skeletons
are collected frequently,
four in the last few days
within a ten mile radius of where
I sit, comfortable and secure,
well-coffeed, well-fed and complacent.
What inspires people to attempt
crossing a very hostile environment
with slim chance of survival
to reach a place where folks
seem so unhappy and fearful?
Why are the unhappy and fearful,
extremely blessed, well-coffeed,
well-fed and complacent people
so resistant to helping folks
risking their lives in such a fashion?
Hello friends and future friends. I hope my
choice of my poetic form is totally absurd.
I don't even know what an Epithalamium is;
so if you are looking for this form, I'm sorry
to disappoint. I haven't posted in awhile, and
perhaps it may be a bit instead of me just
blurting out my mind through my mouth.
I just got vack from a recent trip to
Cartagena, Colombia and have been
writing a collection.
I am going to title it "poems from a broard";
the broad in this case is mi Musa Melissa.
(Maureen, Melissa said you are beautiful
and kept saying "weeeeee" [your last comment]
Presently I am trying to organize poems that
I wrote on my trip as well as a lot written in the
airport waiting to reluctantly leave Cartagena.
Please por favor keep in mind that I would like
to present this as if a book; but know only 10
poems for a period of 24 hours.; so hang in
there with me and I will start to share.
Thanks to all the folks I have met here,
and the folks I hope to meet. Blessings!!!
This is indeed not a poem. I only want you to know that I will be gone for a while. I'll be back, and I will read and comment here and there. So don't worry :)
Hello Poetry Soup! I understand I haven't really posted any new poems as of late, and it's only because of
my birthday just passed (Dec 21st yes!!! I'm 19). So i've been working on about 12 New poems that I will be
posting in the coming days. I just took a little break from cyber space to reflect on the year and my life. I
understand I built myself a good fan base on the site, so don't worry I am a thinking machine so new poems
will be up!
Thank You Poetry Soup
Love, Richard
Poems Coming:
Time
Trust No one
Relationship Epidemic(Females)
Not Good Enough Huh
Testify The Truth
Secrets
Another B-Day
2010
Me and Math
Never Be Friends
Letter To The Lord 2
Un-sobered Thinking
Sometimes I feel like a ship.
A big empty ship, torn sails,
all messed up from crashing myself into rocks and other crap.
Meanwhile, while I'm out weathering this stormy sea all alone all the other ships at the harbor just sailing around with their beautiful perfect sails, and fresh paint, and usually a captain who would make Fabio jealous!
They sail around with their captain and crew on deck.
Yet here I am, oh don't mind me, I'm just here for when you need someone to tow your ship back to the harbor when yal have had to much......salt water!
Or you need to borrow something.......you want to use my anchor fine, use it,
I hope you anchor somewhere desolate, where mad men live, they commandeer you, torture you in some random act of barbarianism, somewhere lost at sea, attacked by evil pirates with bad breath and one eye Kirk just stares at you the whole time!
Even if that did happen not sure I'd feel any better I'd still be out here in this big ocean trying to find my way to a nice quiet harbor somewhere far away from the others, pretty sure I'd get tired of them shooting off their loud a** cannons all the time,
showing off how 'rad' they are * in my frat boy voice*
What if I need a crew sometimes maybe my anchor gets stuck and I need help?
They would just let me sink, fine, go ahead,
but someday I will shoot off my cannons and well...not sure how the harbor will be after that!
On the news this evening was a person who's name I share. He belongs to the church that
intends burning the Koran. That person is in Florida; I live in Iowa and oppose this action
vehemently and hope you will not associate me with him. Thanks!
It's a cry for attention
It's as loud as loud can be
~ The many ways to ask
Wordku: 5-7-5 words
AP: Honorable Mention 2025
Not A Poem But A Thank You
Hello All. I'm sorry if I am late in responding to any review. I truly want to take this time to thank you all for such generosity and grace. Honestly. Never do I take it lightly when someone enters my page. With this being said, since joining almost two months now it has been an honor and privilege reading your work. It is also wonderful being in the same membership. The level of talent is marvelous and so are your poetic expressions. Be proud of your work and style.
Please do not feel the need to respond to this as I know it isn't a poem or in any poetic fashion. I just wanted to say thank you.
Have a wonderful holiday weekend. To all those who celebrate and recognize Easter allow me to say Happy Easter. May the Easter Bunny be good to you and find you.
Once again, I'm sorry for any late response and replies I didn't want anyone to think I was being rude disrespectful or forgetful. I will catch up with everything on Monday.
Thank you
SkyWatcher
ok, lets get some thing straight. my lies? if they are lies then you just screwed yourself
buddy. cos' you believed every "lie" and if i believe something, should i really be persecuted?
deleted? killed even? why should i take this crap from you? all i did was love you. and then
you pull this. so what is it, liar? what is it? just last week you loved me. so stop fooling
yourself by saying you can get better than me. your girl is fugly. just like you. you look like
job of the hut. bet it felt great, thinking you could actually hurt me by "slamming" me. well i
have news for you. i have more crap to say about you than you have to say about me, so
you can go look through your little "slam" and delete all the lies you just wrote.. sorry to
blow your cover, RYAN DIMAIO. hah, you are such a jerk. your dead to me..... just a lost
love that never was. so take that and think of something to slam me with, your little lies. you
are mental. crazy. YOU ARE A JOKE! so there, take that and shove that in yoru little diary.
friggin' slob.
One year anniversary today of the laying to rest my beloved son Nathaniel Blaine Gibson. The most horrific, saddest, tormenting anniversary to have to experience and remember. The sting of his death is still very fresh and excruciatingly painful. Still in shock. Feeling his absence with such intensity. What a heavy burden for all of us to carry, especially for his princess Nayla. The hope in the resurrection promise is the only thing keeping us from completely loosing it. Life is not the same, true happiness is not ours at this time, we live each day in pain. We Love and Miss him so very very very much, WE ARE NOT COMPLETE AS A FAMILY WITHOUT HIM.