Best News Report Poems
There's been a breaking news report about Santa's reindeer.
While flying over Russia, they were lassoed by vile Vladimir!
"I'm determined to ruin Christmas for everyone this year.
Too many smiling faces in the world," he said with a sneer.
An envelope arrived at the Kremlin. Postage was first class.
And a note scribbled from a poet's hand, that was rather crass.
It read, Here's a gift for you. I found it in a pile on my grass.
I hope it reminds you of the poop that plopped from your ass.
Putin was enraged! Someone took a photo of his snarling jeer.
When it was shown on the news, the world let out a cheer!
He's going to take revenge, and wants everyone to live in fear
but I think there's a hero who's going to take down Vladimir.
The one who'll save Christmas is a jolly man in a red suit.
Usually he's kind to others, but not to one of such ill repute.
He'll get back all eight reindeer and his sleigh filled with loot
and tie up old Valdimir, that obnoxious murderous brute!
Santa wasn't injured when putrid Putin captured the reindeer.
Laying a finger beside his nose, he got himself into first gear.
"I'll nuke him," Santa said, "Blast his butt out the hemisphere!
Then deliver toys to girls and boys. Fly home and have a beer."
I watch the news again with a dubious eye of concern
Another terrorist attack, more animals facing extinctions - I learn
Another natural disaster just occurred - Now that deserves coverage
Should they not be reporting though, more about stories of courage?
Of News worthy stories a darker side forever creeps in
Getting caught with the hype I must confess I’m guilty of this sin
Extreme events seem to be the order to feed the people
A grim world to trick us into thinking and following like ‘Sheeple’
Stock market crashes more exaggerated than they actually are
A news report of Dog eats Dog gets a Richter scale of 10 by far
But here on my soap box I stand and put before you my confessions
It’s not about chocolate or addictions of loosely thrown at Love Obsessions
More about the starving masses around the world that need to be fed
Looking through the soulless eyes of a child as he looks at his loved ones dead
Feeling helpless as I hear about the hopelessness of preventing child labor
In a world going wrong that finds it hard to follow The Word ‘Love thy Neighbor’
Now back to a confession of an obsession of Life’s necessities
Though I will not forsake morals, decorum or prudence in my ‘obsessities’
I am not here to play God or a claim to Fame shall I seek
Favoring anonymity I shall reach out - a Voice for the Meek
Would you not love to lead a child from the Dark to the Light?
Would you not love to put an end to a poor man’s plight?
Would you not love to be able to make a blind man see?
Would you not love to hear liberated children laugh in glee?
My Obsession is MONEY, so judge if you thou wilt
If you think this a sin then I stand, 'shameless in my Guilt'
But it’s the only way that I know of where I can make a difference
MONEY is the KEY in my Obsession to alleviate World Sufferance
~ Placed Second in Contest~
Obsession Contest
Sponsored by Silent One
27th July 2017
I tapped into my messages; the gas
company wanted a piece of me, and
my ex wanted to know when the
month’s alimony would be arriving.
But it was the last message which
caught my attention the most; Big Foot,
the wrestler, wanted to meet me for
lunch the following day, at The Big Burger,
on east 14th street at noon.
Who was I to turn him down? A 50 caliber
showman with a WWA win list as long as
your arm, and a five million dollar contract,
with a major west coast TV station.
I cleared my appointments for late morning
and early afternoon, the following day, and
laid out my jeans and WWA T-shirt and a couple
of indigestion tabs, with BF’s appetite in mind.
It was about 11.45am, when I drove up to the
Big Burger’s orange and purple frontage and
past the helium-filled, giant airborne, polythene
burger, floating forty feet up in the clear blue,
summer sky.
The place was quiet, a few truckers and an old
couple, talking and munching their burgers and
fries, off their plastic, melamine plates.
The air conditioning was welcome; the sweat
slowly froze, then disappeared from the middle
of my chest: but it was a news report which
caught my attention, on the overhead TV.
“Bigfoot announces retirement and unveils plan
to open shelter for bigfoot families and abused
bigfoot wives in Alaskan wilderness.”
Then the main door swung open and he walked in with
the biggest grin I had ever seen, and approached my table,
all seven feet of him, took my hand and shook it.
”Well kid, it’s all go from here,” he said, thumbing at the TV.
“I’m giving you across the board publishing and screen writing rights.
I‘ve never forgotten how you helped me, get where I am today,
partner.”
I closed my eyes and mumbled inside, “Thank you God.” And we ate
our burgers, he ate five, and spent the next two hours making plans for,
“The Return of Bigfoot to the Wild”
I got a phone call from the police
saying I was dead
That was news to me,
getting shot four times in the head
Within the hour the rumor had spread,
hey, did you hear about Fred
They thought Freddie was dead,
Freddie was dead
DOA was what the police report said
They thought Freddie was dead,
Freddie was dead
DOA was what the news report said
I hope you never lose your driver's license,
the one without the photo ID
A criminal could become you, technically
Mistaken identity
can give you and your family
a whole lot of stress
A causeless calamity
is something we can all agree
creates an awful mess
So if you ever get a wrong phone call,
telling you that you died that day
Missing your own funeral is perfectly okay
Unprovoked attacks
Death screams from the hearts of the innocent
A child's last breath
Lies in your arms
Raise your weapon
For the sickness f****ing your mind
Protect and serve?
F*** that, let's massacre them all
Let's burn and pillage
This family's home and make them watch
Piss in this man's hands
And spit at his feet
Let bullets rain on his chest
So his children see
Protect and serve?
Intimidate and rape
They fear your "help"
And comply with tears in their eyes
And a gun to their temple
Dirt on their knees, in a pool of their father's blood
Protect and serve?
I think not.
*About a news report I recently saw, about U.S. soldiers killing innocent civilians for
sport. (This has been going on since there has ever been wars, it's not a new issue.) They
blamed it on being in a drug-induced state of mind, and on seeing disturbing images of
warfare. We debated in my class whether or not this type of murder can be justified. I
argued strongly and loudly that NO traumatization or drugged mind is a just reason to
murder and torture innocent people. The U.S. military is here to PROTECT and SERVE all
people. Does this sound like protection to you?
A tennis player loses
And they say he’s been upset.
Well, naturally, I understand
Upset is what he’d get.
This term is never utilized
In any other sport.
At least, I’ve never heard it
In the sporting-news report.
“The Yankees were upset tonight,”
Implies they were in tears.
“The Knicks were so upset, they sobbed
In consolation beers.”
You’d never hear The Giants
Or the Cowboys got upset,
Yet tennis players publicly
Get linked with their regret.
I wonder how this word, so sad,
Became the one they use.
Would tennis players rather
Be upset or just plain lose?
summer afternoon
palest blue sky dotted white...
a thunderstorm ripped by screams
policeman lies pale
scarlet blood saturates shirt...
tear stains upon children's clothes
twenty years have passed
memories lie buried deep...
news report opens sutures
Written: July 22, 2016
Inspired by contest..
Did I tell you, I hear voices in my head,
“Kill, kill,” I think that’s what they said.
Spoke to my therapist but then she disappeared,
Police questioned me, which I found weird.
She’d been stabbed sixty times outside her front door,
They called me in again and questioned me some more.
That morning I woke covered in blood
I buried the evidence near the marsh, in the mud
I sat at home, the voices loud in my head,
As the news report said now one hundred women dead.
The voices etching the same word like a razor sharp quill,
In my brain, “Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill.”
I need fresh air, on this lovely, hot summer’s night
But I find I’m standing behind the couch, watching you in plain site
Turn around, look, you’ll see me with a knife
Watch closely while I slowly take away your life…
See you soon
In France, on Friday the fourteenth of February a famous French family flamed fires in a faulty fireplace causing a frightening fire. Fresco street friends fretfully watched as fifty fabulous firemen fought furiously the ferocious flashing flames. Finally, at four o'clock in the afternoon the fatigued firemen finished fighting the frightening flames and the filthy firetrucks fled off to the fire station.
It was a day like every other,
In his monotonous life.
He showered and he shaved;
Shared a good-bye kiss with his wife.
Dropped his son off at school,
On his commute into work;
Oblivious to the car radio news report
About a gunman gone berserk.
She called him at his office
For their usual mid-morning chat;
His recorded tones on voice mail said,
“I’ll return your call when I get back.”
He missed his boss’ staff meeting;
They figured he must have called in sick.
His emails went unanswered;
His in-box was growing kind of thick.
His son couldn’t find him
In the stands at his basketball game;
His wife was left wondering all day,
Why the return call never came.
His secretary couldn’t track him down;
His cell phone went straight to voice mail.
To the clients trying to find him,
She didn’t know just what to tell.
The police said there was nothing they could do
Until twenty-four hours had come and passed;
When later in the evening
His wife called them at last.
The wife and son sat by the phone;
Not knowing just what to do.
They both finally went to sleep
When the mantle clock showed half past two.
His car was never found,
His whereabouts never confirmed.
Whatever happened to this average man,
No one ever was to learn.
His wife never forgave him;
His son never forgot;
It was a day like every other,
But for him, that day was not.
I’m the cigarette you smoked
till you kicked the habit;
the Friday night you washed away
to observe the Sabbath.
The structure’s burning slow,
but the light’s fading fast.
The shape is still intact,
but it’s just a pile of ash.
Went out to face the world,
but my heart wasn’t there.
The breeze blew my soul to pieces,
but my legs were spared.
Got me feeling weightless
walkin’ ‘round this hell
directly down a lonely road
I’ve come to know too well.
All the hope that I want
sits in an ashtray;
I looked to the future,
only to see it look away.
Remembering the love makes it
impossible to bury the pain;
the last time you cry for me
the breeze will send my remains.
I am the tattoo
concealed beneath your flesh
with the sins committed
you’ll never have to confess.
You may find someone better,
but it’ll never be the same.
You cleaned up really nice,
but I’m a permanent stain.
My legs took me outta town
to the edge of the land;
No one else was around
so I wrote your name in the sand.
Couldn’t watch you go before –
this time I decided to stay.
I lied down next to it
till the tide washed it away.
Sunday morning alarm
invading my bed;
my legs are supposed to work,
but they might just sleep instead.
Opening my eyes
is a risk I don’t wanna take
cuz you’re always right next to me
until I’m awake.
I am the addiction
you’ve gotta stay away from;
the cancer that inhabited you
while you bathed in the sun.
And you know I waste away
without a host;
try to push it all down under,
but I guess love floats.
I just heard the news report
and it provoked an interesting thought;
could’ve turned it into a conversation,
but I already forgot.
Feel lonely as the pope
with lots of faces around;
a marathon or two away
from settlin’ down.
Doused myself in bug repellent
and slept in clean sheets;
dreamt I won the competition
and that we’d played for keeps.
Saw you 20 years from now
and it made me cry;
I cried out, “I still love you,”
but there was no reply
Couldn’t you change your perception
of me just one more time?
Cuz your future gives me hope,
but I’m scared to death of mine.
( LOVE LETTER )
Somehow I always feel better,
When I write you another love letter,
I let out my cries,
Never saying our goodbyes,
Then slip it in the pocket of your sweater.
I tell you my fears,
That bring me salted tears,
I wipe the pressure away,
In this short essay,
As bliss forms and reappears.
As the pencil rapidly flows,
I try to explain and compose,
The way I feel,
Is too good to be real,
Better than a red red rose.
Telling you my dreams,
Letting out all my screams,
Showing you I care,
And this relationship can go somewhere,
Is filling the sky with God`s gleams.
You do something to me,
You let me fly and set me free,
Your simple touch,
Is way too much,
For even god to see.
I keep on writing like before,
But this time it`s so much more,
About your eyes that makes me melt,
It`s something that I`ve never felt,
It`s your soul I deeply implore.
I will stand by you,
Until the earth`s core turns a pale blue,
I`ll indicate the love I share,
Make it unable for anyone to compare,
And keep the hope I have, true.
Times that hurt and make you mad,
I`ll cheer you up to make you glad,
I`ll offer you my support,
I`ll even give you the news report,
And remind you of the times we`ve had.
Believe in me for I`m the one,
That shows you how to have some fun,
My quest to write this simple letter,
Can make things for us so much better,
Now our life together has just begun.
The ways of the world today are out of control
so much going on that doesn't set well with my soul
people in positions of power making decisions that's wrong
and in the midst of what's happening we're all being strung along
People getting crazier as the days go by
as I sit and think it over it brings about a sigh
what is this world of ours coming to be
not looking very good as far as my eye can see
Every other news report is ending with a crime
it sure would be nice to hear good news from time to time
so used to hearing about tragedy that it comes as no surprise
or at least that's how it appears when our faces wear a disguise
The ways of the world today are out of control
as we sit back and watch the story unfold
Lets hope that in the future it will all end up well
because what's ahead for us only time will tell.
There's another virus going around.
Flustered by everything COVID-19;
I am grateful I still have a job,
but grumpy I have to drive there in the rain -
I need to get to the fast lane or I'll be late...
What's this?
A driver slowing down to let me in their lane
with a smile and a friendly wave.
A news report of teenagers with cellos and violins
playing a quartet on the porch of their
"self-isolating" elderly neighbor.
A good Samaritan
giving away toilet paper
to whomever has need.
The new guy in our coffee co-op
making a pot of decaf while
grinding beans for the high-octane pot AND
cleaning out the sink.
A friend sending out an email
asking How is everybody?
Knowing we're all hanging on by a thread
Please infect me with this kindnessvirus
I want to pass it around
(Never really done one of these before, but the news report this morning inspired me to do a
senryu)
standing midst the rubble
homeless Haitians
sing their prayers