Best Meaner Poems
I was enjoying my time in the sandbox
When a redhead with freckles climbed in.
The glint in his eyes left no question,
His mission was ruin and sin.
With my pail I had sculpted a castle,
But he eyed it with fiendish disdain.
His foot was the boot of destruction,
And he smashed it without any shame.
He laughed when he saw my reaction,
Through my tears I could tell he was glad.
My first lesson was learned in that sandbox,
There's nothing can keep out the bad.
I discerned that the boy with the freckles,
Had no interest in making a friend.
Though he had the face of an angel,
His looks hid a devil within.
I met him again in the school yard,
He was older and meaner by then.
He twisted my arm back behind me,
And insisted that I holler out, "When!"
I wish I could boast I played hero,
But he scared me out of my wits.
He growled "say when or I'll break it."
And I knew that I dare not resist.
All through the rest of my school days,
He tormented me whenever he could.
I spent way too much time in hiding,
Too fearful to do what I should.
We crossed paths again playing soccer,
And of course we were on different teams.
His attacks were not part of the playing,
He got off on the pain and the screams.
We never met while I was in college,
Though I heard he had landed in jail.
I wasn't glad at all that it happened,
Till I though of that sandbox and pail.
Like all lights at the end of the tunnel,
Aren't those that you wish would remain.
For a light in the darkness can fool you,
And turn out to be an on-coming train.
There's no judging a book by its cover,
So I caution you girls, "stay alert."
Some of those boys who have freckles,
Are devils who love bringing you hurt.
Categories:
meaner, bullying, childhood, evil,
Form:
Rhyme
Some folks call me a sausage dog
I think they couldn’t be meaner
It’s not my fault I’m long and short
And look like a misshapen wiener
I’ve got four stumpy little legs
So my tummy is near to the ground
My owner’s take me for a drag not a walk
Guess that's why they named me Cigarette!
01~16~15
Contest: Dachshunds – Rob Carmack
~awarded 9th place~
Premiere Contest #13 sponsored by SKAT
Categories:
meaner, dog, humorous,
Form:
Free verse
Poor little Zena zebra was feeling oh so sad
She was born an albino, which made her look bad
Zena desperately wanted to fit in with the others
And have a stripy body like her sisters and brothers
Zena thought hard and came up with a cunning plan
She would paint some stripes, so she’d have great élan
Zena went shopping in a local hardware store
Bought some black paint for the stripes she’d adore
Her stripes were brushed on by a trusted friend
But quickly the can of paint came to an end
Sadly Zena hadn’t got any more money
Her half painted body looked rather funny
How the other zebra’s laughed at poor Zena
They called her names; they couldn’t be meaner
But good luck was on little Zena’s side that day
The rain lashed down and washed the paint away
For Zena had purchased watercolour paint
Now Zena’s back to white and she has no complaint
She stands out in the crowd because she is unique
Yes she’s different from the others but her look is oh so chic
Zena stands proudly in her white coat which shines so bright
She is delighted to say not everything in life is black and white
Moral of the story it is our differences that make us unique
A delightful Children’s fable Contest Sponsored by Carol Eastman.
Submitted to z contest old or new
Sponsored by Constance La France
07~10~16
Categories:
meaner, animal, discrimination, fantasy, humorous,
Form:
Couplet
Original limerick written by Jan Allison
A petite ballerina named Tina
Seemed serene but she couldn’t be meaner
When she got in the sack
She was on the attack
At the size and the shape of his ‘wiener’
Her suitors would then try to dodge her
After insults on their little todger
But listen up guys
I have a surprise
She’s transgender and she was once Rodger!
Continuation poem written by Sonny Roper
Tina wanted a special honeymoon night
She wanted everything to be just right
Into his drink she slipped two little blue pills
It was to enhance their midnight thrills
Into the bed she jumped with her stud
But the night suddenly turn into a dud
Fred was in the land of dreams! As a joke it seems
Someone had slipped Novocain into her Vaseline!
Original Limerick by Jan Allison - the story of Tina continued by Sonny Roper
25th March 2016
Categories:
meaner, humorous, wedding,
Form:
Rhyme
I say to you lets take a walk...to laugh...to chill...and simply talk.
Let’s start heading across the rocks...and go beneath the streets of Rome.
Let us take a break from our feet...down a path right beneath quaint streets,
This is the place where all roads meet...where I’m meaner than Al Capone,
And I could simply make this easy...but your mind will not be blown.
You’ll never see your children grown.
For I thought you was my best friend, but for now you will face your end,
You’re heading there out of your sin...to no light...no love...or cell-phones.
You’ll dwell in torment forever, birds of feather flock together,
In this hall there is no weather, the only echoes are your own,
You’ll rot in disgust and your shameful heart will always be alone.
My love for you...I will condone.
With such greed life karma prevails...and in darkness your bones’ll dwell.
Doesn’t matter how loud you yell...no one will hear that high pitched tone.
I vent all of my frustrations...without any hesitations,
After my retaliation...of this sweet revenge I will prone.
After kicking you in the face...what’s this...is it bodily foam..?
So un-brick the bricks to the dome!
And I don’t care if your legs hurt...for this is how you made it work,
You built your tomb under a church...right beneath its’ big golden throne.
Now behind the mortar you cry...and no one can bade their goodbyes.
My friend...you used to smile so wise...who smiles now as the other moans..?
You love what you can’t have...life...I’m done...revenge has proudly shone.
You’ll die behind the wall of stone.
All of your hate and jealousy...is buried with greed and envy,
You’ll fade from earth as unworthy...right beneath other dried up bones.
Here’s my remorse...wait a minute...clear my nose...on the wall I spit,
Your ego fits nicely here...I’m starting to like your new home.
I’ll let you be with a marker...that I have engraved out of chrome.
“The center of the catacombs”.
_____________________________________
The form is Trochaic Octameter
Iambic pentameter serves as the substitute.
Categories:
meaner, parody, sisterlove,
Form:
Iambic Pentameter
A girl with a thought
woman with a scheme
A dream catcher who sought
An impossible dream
One in a million
A shot in the dark
Many boxes to fill in
And lights to spark
But efforts relentless
Lines being walked
Issues to address
Loose ends pulling taut
Moments of uncertainty
Pride scarred and bruised
Others shine perfectly
Control set on cruise
But the grass isn't greener
Only an alternative hue
The storm isn't meaner
Or the sky more blue
She is conscious and aware
These assumptions are false
To get here from there
Bridges will be crossed
Keeping God in the center
And a shallow depth of field
She'll arrive where he sent her
She need only be still
Categories:
meaner, dedication, faith, god,
Form:
Rhyme
And so it is, that both the Devil and the angelic Spirit present us with objects of desire to awaken our power of choice. There is an invisible strength within us; when it recognizes two opposing objects of desire, it grows stronger.
Rumi
Weeds persecute the gardens of my mind,
bad seeds are instigators for the unkind,
so, I plant vibrant petals for tomorrow,
did you know blossoms can feel sorrow?
I support them to bloom in delicate silence,
but strange paranoia is a relic of violence.
It hurts when withheld wounds are exposed,
life is better when I keep my eyes closed.
Should I apologise for my sullen demeanor,
so they can misjudge and become meaner?
I've become a misunderstood metaphor,
in a world of words not understood before.
I'm not an angelic devil nor a sinful saint,
but sense of shame is like polluted paint.
I'm tired from deadly brain sucking vampires,
draining my reservoir of peaceful empires.
Will it ever dawn upon the ignorant,
if I could turn back time it would be different.
In childhood we painted our faces on stars,
some looked for Venus, but I preferred Mars.
How we followed a colourful spectrum's shadow,
wondering if rain flows along the rainbow.
But in time imagination loses it's power,
we expire like dead seeds and forget to flower.
Is the pantomime of pain I've endured not plenty?
Can guilt bleed me dry, until all my sins empty?
Set me free from confines of jilted desire,
release me from burning in regret's bonfire.
Madness of my muse will never disown me.
In this hell I smile, as I still have my poetry.
Categories:
meaner, analogy, emotions, metaphor,
Form:
Rhyme
** A Very Memorable Christmas Present **
Someone made an err::
Boxing Day ‘ere’s
Been the day of — not after.
What started as the greatest
Christmas ever, turned
Us from better to worse
As our tempers grew, altered
After our fingers were slid into
Those gift-wrapped firm gloves of leather,
Punching through the room’s air
At each other
With words roused from harsh to meaner,
‘Till our referee pup barked
To end our Round 1, forcing a turnover
Into creating a round of rich laughter.
Re-freshed, happier, remembering our
Proper manners appropriate to honor
Our Savior’s birthday…We resolved
A return trip to the store to trade
That shared present of boxing gloves for
A healthier, sturdy set of parallel bars.
————————————————————————————————————————
(c) sally young eslinger 12/25/22
Happy Birthday, King Jesus
Categories:
meaner, boxing day , christmas, dog,
Form:
Alliteration
IF LOOKS COULD KILL
My dearest darling delectable Medusa
I was wearing dark glasses on the day we first met
You wanted your hair done, but it was no use-a
as venomous snakes should be treated by a vet!
It was obvious that you’d once been so pretty
But you’d been cursed by that wicked Athena
Then been banished from town and the city
Your beauty gone; Athena couldn’t have been meaner!
I love to caress your angel like wings
As writhing asps kiss your hideous ears
You’re the one who pulls at my heartstrings
I’ll be your love throughout our twilight years
One look from you can turn men to stone
I wear dark glasses so it doesn’t affect me
My love for you has blossomed and grown
We’ll be together forever for eternity
Sponsored by Viv Wigley
Love letter II Contest
3/24/18
Categories:
meaner, fantasy, humorous, love, myth,
Form:
Rhyme
In a house too huge for them to maintain,
a man hunched over with back pain lives
with a disabled daughter and
his very elderly wife.
A recent heart attack
has left her frailer
and meaner. The
doctor “says”
she will
die.
Not
willing
to get up
or walk for years,
she had atrophied.
Refusing sponge baths, meds,
or a private nurse, she screams
for her ill spouse whose little strength
does little good. Time is crawling on
the doomsday clock: two minutes to midnight.
Feb. 18, 2018
For Emile Pinet's the doomsday clock: two minutes to midnight contest
Categories:
meaner, death,
Form:
Etheree
WRITTEN WARRIOR POET ROBERT LINDLEY
I'm not complaining
But I am reading
verse by verse words of coarse
Letters combine making words that rhyme
Master penmanship
Honor I find
No ones listening (no one but I)
but there reading your craft
I submise
Meaner are
I'm just not counting
A brilliant, graceful man whose calling is...
Favored by and in God
Been through a lot and
All those haters and pertenders
I am not one of them
I respect the gifted
Mr. R Lindley
Been writin, and rappin and pennin
for sometime
Righteous carried of verses
Righteously divining truths
I respect the gifted
Mr. R Lindley
Been writin, and rappin and pennin
IT'S FROM HIS HEART THOSE WORDS
And i'm not a shame to call him my brother
Shared from God
He ain't protendin
Written Warrior Robert Lindley
writes for you and me
proficient verses in liberties
chosen carrier
author from a long time ago
blessed then and in this present
times written verses past, present, future
such a virture
where do those words come from
God the Father and the son
My brother a CO-creator
voicing words consoles
Penning commentary all endearing
Spirit mind and soul
making sure nothing ignored
I got to read these holy words
some emotional, spiritual, historical
choosen carrier
I respect the gifted
Mr. R Lindley
Been writin, and rappin and pennin
IT'S FROM HIS HEART THOSE WORDS
Shared from God
He ain't protendin
Written Warrior Robert Lindley
Inspired and Dedicated to Poet Robert Lindley
12/11/17
by James Edward Lee Sr.
from anthology "Gods Children Poets, Poems and New Friends Vol 2
Categories:
meaner, adventure, analogy, appreciation, poetry,
Form:
Dramatic Verse
A petite ballerina named Tina
Seemed serene but she couldn’t be meaner
When she got in the sack
She was on the attack
At the size and the shape of his ‘wiener’
Her suitors would then try to dodge her
After insults on their little todger
But listen up guys
I have a surprise
She’s transgender and she was once Rodger!
New or Old 4 - Poetry Contest Sponsored by Eve Roper
20th March 2016
Categories:
meaner, dance, humorous, relationship, silly,
Form:
Limerick
Sitting in the outhouse,
Gettin' high on turds;
Thinking about my crappy life,
Can't sum it up in words
The kids ain't worth a quarter,
They're meaner than the mob;
All they do is eat and fart,
They won't go find a job!
I have a cat named Bonzo,
He hates his litterbox;
Squats wherever he chooses,
Right on my favorite socks
My stupid dog Binky,
Dumber than an English pea;
He never barks at strangers,
Instead, he barks at me!
My bills are in collections,
I'm about to lose my job;
The car's in repossession,
I feel like a rotten slob
Maybe I'll grab my gun,
And try to end it all;
Enough with all the drama,
I'm tired of takin' the fall!
When I think I've had enough,
Others have it worse;
Suicide's the cheap way out,
It's time to put God first!
Who knows if I'll be homeless,
Standing in a kitchen's line;
Today the skies are dreary,
Tomorrow's sun will shine
Categories:
meaner, faith, funny, hope, uplifting,
Form:
Rhyme
Death never favours
Death does not discriminate between
Saints and sinners
losers and winners
Princes and paupers
followers or leaders
Dependents or
breadwinners
The fatter or thinner
Those who over ate of life's banquet
and those who austerely skipped its dinner.
Or the healed and the healers
the kinder or the meaner
The angels of death almost acting
as finders keepers
Today to lie in shrouds and coffins
yesterday's pall bearers
But many sigh with relief
when it kills the killers
It's upto us to part from the world
as loved good doers
Ah death may just knock
at anybody's lock.
Death is indiscriminate
yet curse it not
for it's a mere transition
to another new more perfect world
We didn't enjoy
coming into this world either
judging from all that bawling we did as newborns
When we're born we cry
but our folks happily rejoice
but we don't when we die
when our folks weep in mourning voice.
As human bones upon death gather dust
and are merged and lost in the earth's crust
The souls fly to heaven coz they must.
Categories:
meaner, death,
Form:
Rhyme
Helter-skelter, upper-downer,
Bigger smaller, richer poorer
Bitter sweeter, kinder meaner
Sifter opener, thicker thinner.
Meek or dumb, pinky and thumb
Top or bottom, height and fathom.
Head or toe, friend and foe
Day or night, left and right.
Larry scoops Moe; Moe swoops Curly
Curly chunks Larry; Larry yanks Moe.
Categories:
meaner, hilarious,
Form:
Alliteration