Outhouse Blues

Sitting in the outhouse, Gettin' high on turds; Thinking about my crappy life, Can't sum it up in words The kids ain't worth a quarter, They're meaner than the mob; All they do is eat and fart, They won't go find a job! I have a cat named Bonzo, He hates his litterbox; Squats wherever he chooses, Right on my favorite socks My stupid dog Binky, Dumber than an English pea; He never barks at strangers, Instead, he barks at me! My bills are in collections, I'm about to lose my job; The car's in repossession, I feel like a rotten slob Maybe I'll grab my gun, And try to end it all; Enough with all the drama, I'm tired of takin' the fall! When I think I've had enough, Others have it worse; Suicide's the cheap way out, It's time to put God first! Who knows if I'll be homeless, Standing in a kitchen's line; Today the skies are dreary, Tomorrow's sun will shine