Best Mall Poems

Eddie went to the mall full of *****
He was always real proud of his junk
While taking a leak
Decided to streak
Suzie yelled, “Mommy, he has a trunk”...

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About thanksgiving a bunch of turkeys get together,
Have a meeting about sales for the holidays.
About fall they send out that letter.

Well those business folks got to cuss and discuss,
And figure how to gear it,
To make us customers
Feel that holiday spirit!

Here’s the minutes of the meeting,
We’ll...

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Each Wall In Mall

We found that each wall,
Existing in shopping mall
Was about to fall.

Seems like my poems vary
between haiku and limericks.

Jim Horn...

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footfall

too small...

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After parking I busted my ass
Cut my elbows and knees on some glass
What was my first thought?
“Quick! Scan the whole lot
To make sure no one saw you, JACKASS”...

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When that jolly red man with a sack
brings your wishes to you off the rack,
no late Christmas night
for first frosty light,
warm the car up and take it all back....

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Walking wounded 
in the mall,
so many, so joyless,
grimly marching from 
store to store.
So few with a dance
in their step.
Buying and not needing,
hoping things will change
their life.
Looking and wanting,
this really is Cibola,
a golden illusion,
all you could want, yet
you still age searching
for streets paved
with rubies
and a temple...

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Super Mall
                                          even the...

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Wally’s going to the mall today to buy some things he needs,
like toothpaste, soap, and bubble bath, and packs of flower seeds.
The first thing in the store he sees - the big long escalator.
He says, “I’ll not ride on that thing with teeth like alligators.”

Pushed...

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The following poem was written at the request of my wife and it is intended to be ‘gently mocking’ in its style. 
The reader MUST stroll though it for that purpose alone. 


A long time ago, when with my mother, I went
On a shopping trip...

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mall security
the other law enforcement
you can shop at ease...

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I came here only but once
And that was not long ago
Hunger had brought me here
And I went my way satisfied
And fully determined to return

When I walked up the stairs
From the parking lot below
I was hungry and I was thirsty
And it seemed to me a long
Long...

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IN THE MALL

On the long white strip
Carnival strains
A circus tune from a Music Box store

I sit and watch
As the passing crowd – mostly by twos – appear
      to catch rhythm
A most amusing spectacle

The shapes
The sizes
Singular     ...

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Like fruitless wanderers,
mall walkers slap their feet
in a rhythm
that goes nowhere.
Only round and round,
past mega-bucks sales;
pet store puppy mill reject dogs,
a merry-go-round for elderly exercisers.
Fitness for arthritic window shoppers.
Fashion pants do beckon,
'come forth and sally
ye nomads of the modern world.'...

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A parody of Wordsworth's "The World Is Too Much with Us,” which appears under the parody       
            

The mall is too much with us, spring and fall.
Getting and...

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