Best Gyp Poems

I visited Doctor Longdong 
Told doc something’s terribly wrong 
The pain in my hip
Is giving me gyp
He said it was caused by my thong!

I admit I’ve put on some weight
Can’t resist cream cakes on my plate 
My ‘EX’ boyfriend was rude …
So I’m in a...

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Got a party coming up
I need to learn some moves
so I listened to the all-time greats
for tips on how to groove.
These music legends from times past
should know the moves to use
but what they say is conflicting
and now I'm just confused.
Curtis Mayfield sang 'move on up'
Dobie...

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'Umbrella Jim' was the sneakiest scoundrel west of the Missisip'!
Usin' the shell game and sleight of hand, of yer purse he'd gyp.
He'd set up shop 'neath an umbrella whether inside or under an oak.
Usin' three thimbles and a ball he cleaned the jeans of many...

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Horsemen moving camp I already saw ,
And storming to show themselves then to start,
And too sometimes for escape  withdraw;

Fast runners I saw in your land depart,
Oh Aretines, and gatherers to go,
Tournaments fight and also the joust art;

Sometimes with bells, sometimes with trumpets blow,
With drums...

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The steely-eyed hombre stepped down from the stage that sultry afternoon.
He looked about with disdain, then swaggered to the Cripple Creek Saloon.
His hat lay low upon his brow and swung low was a pair of 44's on his hips.
He sported fancy duds and greeted a...

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Sending the tending to an unfriended ending,
 yet somehow suspending from rending a newly offending recommending.
Logotype monotype linotype,
overripe stereotype,
 teletyped an unripe heliotype. 
Guttersnipe snipe,
 stipe snipe ripe,
 a wipe type a tripe, 
unleash a withering hype. 


Dip snip,
nip lip,
slip skip,
rip the apple pip
over a...

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Two players were vying at darts,
there’s chaos when somebody farts
Both players deny
letting a fart fly 
and suddenly the trouble starts

Maybe their gut gave them some gyp,
and secretly they just let rip
The smell of rotten eggs
wafted between his legs
This wasn’t deemed good gamesmanship!

The farting was done...

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I was working cattle with a crew a little south of Muleshoe,
When I watched a horse work with perfection and grace.
I said "pardon me gent, no offense is meant,
But your horse is the smartest thing on this place."

He broke out in a grin and scratched...

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Is your mind in the gutter,
full of what you shouldn't utter?
  Or perhaps it's your conscience
  which eats you alive with slanderous nonsense--
  about your ex, matters of sex, or your neighbor's pecs?

Heh-heh, join the club, bub.
You're not going to drown in...

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Out of the womb I slip
In fluids and blood I drip
The umbilical cord has a snip
My pulse does a skip

Hands all over me grip
In hope and faith I dip
But why do I sense a rip
My soul just had a strip

'Not a girl!' - on someone's...

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Your clothes are flimsy as rags
With dirt’s that stench the air
Your skin are dry and creaky
Like a bread that lost its touch
Your mouth always quick to speak
With a voice sounding like drums
Despised in the land of everywhere
Wanted in the company of no one
Oh harridan avert...

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~Gypsies Tramps and Thieves~
Gypsies what do we think, the word is coupled with hate
But were the original gypsies - aware of their fate
The Egyptian forebears were exiled from their home
Supposedly for hiding Jesus so too other continents they did roam
The Romaine Egyptians, were then exiled...

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I wonder how it whips the zephyrs that flee
In a churlish yet blissful den
Throttling though the gushing of glee
And seized a million mirth like a wee ben?

I wonder how the flowers bloom
In a precise moment of a single day
Glaring it's beauty to the groom
Whom she...

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Turn round around
Get me astounding 
Wait for me 
Do not disagree
Let us glue
Traces of you
Superb memories abounding 
Which keeps funding
With kindest emotion
My hearty devotion 
Playing thy guitar 
But we are
Not to share
What duties ensnare
And the honor 
Of great Connor 
Shining so bright
How cognizance ignite 
Like...

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I must have a bad concussion
Or in some kind of confusion
Giving you another chance
At supplying me romance
Sending new feelings in my soul
I just hope you pay the toll
And not gyp me like before
Leaving my heart hurt and sore
Losing kisses and soft hugs
Romantic fires and warm...

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