Best Gluten Poems
This low-fat
Gluten-free
Vegan stuff
Ain't that bad
If you add
A big dollop of butter
And dump it
On a biscuit.
Now a days
Most of the time
I eat fake bread
GF bread
For health reasons
My wife can’t tolerate the real thing
And so,
I eat fake bread
Fake pasta
Fake pizza
But every so often
I want the real deal
I crave bread
Made with wheat
And a real pizza
And real pasta
And real donuts
from my unpublished chapbook, "fake things" available on my web page https://theworldaccordingtocosmos.com
If you doubt there’s real evil in the world
try gluten-free pizza - it’s a super low-value experience
imagine something criminal, like pizza on a cracker.
Which highlights the problematic nature of live-forever nutrition.
Who’d want to live forever - if that’s what you had to eat?
Ok let’s wax poetic..
Our night of Friday unfolded against a black background
for the thinning wind-moon was a coin already spent.
Oh, it still hung sharp in orbit and still called to obedient waters,
and, when it could, it patterned the trees and hills with a pale spectral light,
but lovers, who unwisely looked to it as a heavenly witness of their love - mere hours ago - had to admit that the unearthly lampion, was unshapely shrinking behind the silver edged clouds.
Ask not for the night to answer for day or even ever-constant stay
for the moon is but a brief pulse, an intermittent flashlight on night’s black velvet.
Wax off…
Peter and I reserve Friday nights for getting stupid. We’re developing regular urban nightlife haunts - like the Gate club and Palais Maillot.
But if you go, book ahead and plan on paying extra for a VIP zone or the mezzanines, otherwise - god - you’ll end up in the thrashing mob - and you can order-in food in VIP areas.
This will sound crazy - and I don’t know why - but jammed, swirling-lazer-lit clubs make me think of human trafficking - I’d never go to a club alone.
.
.
A song for this:
Daft Punk Is Playing at My House by LCD Soundsystem
The Moon Cave (feat. Asha Puthli) by Gorillaz
mangetout (The Dare remix) by Wet Leg
“Eye of newt, and toe of frog,
Wool of bat, and tongue of dog,
Adder's fork, and blind-worm's sting,
Lizard's leg, and owlet's wing,—
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.
Double, double toil and trouble;
Fire burn, and caldron bubble.”
? William Shakespeare Macbeth The Witches brew
I’m hungry, sounds good to me~ I sure hope it’s gluten and dairy free
I can't stand a food fanatic
They dine at my house, and want gluten free
I just smile and look enigmatic
Ignoring their wishes doesn't bother me.
For the vegans, I include an egg
For vegetarians, I sprinkle in beef
For teetotalers, I use beer from a keg
If they knew, they'd punch me in the teeth.
But why should I humor a food fanatic
Why should I waste precious cooking time
They're all nuts, like my aunt in the attic
Wasting good food is to me a crime.
I'm a meat and potatoes guy myself
Dunkin Doughnuts and McDonalds are good enough for me
A couple of drinks haven't ruined my health
Why should I honor their idiocy?
But I raise a question, because I must
Should we respect nonsense requests?
Are we betraying a trust
Or encouraging people to be pests?
Truthfully I'm a food fanatic
This whole poem is just a lie
I've weak, even my walk is erratic
But I'll stick with my diet, don't ask me why.