Best Chump Poems

This is the story of mad Molly Shaw
She might be mad now but she wasn’t before
she came home to find her man dead on the...

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So you call yourself a rhymer,
you’re nothing but a social climber. 
I got better rhymes than you in my sleep.
If you come my way accept...

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A session with my chiropodist
Is an occasion not to be missed.
We speak of recipes and cruise ships
And other folks' relationships
And pension plans and how to...

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Zany insanity,
he’s a buffoon from the moon-
Quipster and hipster,
he’s a complicated pantaloon.
Prankster gangster,
tactless with madness-
Wisecracker and entertainer
is he fun, or full of sadness? 

He’s humorous...

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Oh, ain’t he plump,
Yeah, watch him shake his big round rump.
And the nicest way that I can say it is
Ain’t he plump?

Oh, ain’t he stout,
Yeah,...

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ME, MY MUSE AND ME!

ME
What I am about to say and do,
Would be inconceivable by more 
Than a few,
How could I dare,
Its isn’t fair,
For it...

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The puppet pranced
The strings frayed
A jackass brayed
As poppin’ hoppys
Sat and rose
In ballet dance
Of well browned nose
Applause and “clapture”
of Stockholm rapture
A mocking strut
Of failing stature

Overseers jaundiced...

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I strolled through the local cemetery the other day
And here are some epitaphs I observed along the way:

Cletus O'Toole lies herein
Too much boozing done him...

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courtesy of management in general
and particularly Jackie Geiger 
assistant property agent.

One benefit living social 
at Highland Manor Apartments
until decrepit and bent...
constitutes qualifying for reimbursement
direct deposited...

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I’d like too invite all to be my guest
a dine of mindfulness and rhyme digest 
a week of conflict now victory blessed 
standing united to...

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Dear Sir or Madam

I’m not in the habit of talking to air
But just for the moment I’ll talk like you’re there
My mind isn’t closed to...

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Donald Trump 
Is not such a chump
But If he found Cancer cure, brought world peace secure, and economy back from failure
Still by some he’d be...

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The crowd dots the cavernous hall,
colorfully scatter like a box of fallen jujubes,
a virtual confetti of humanity
with hoots and catcalls, the ruckus roar.

The politicians venture...

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The whole world is laughing at Trump
Whose thoughts seem to come from his rump
Disinfectant swill
Gave the world a chill
But clearly proved Trump is a chump!...

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Europe's concerned
  The world will burn
Russia's a tad worried
  Her ambitions may be buried

Mr. Obama's lashed out and chided
  His country's withdrawal...

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