Best Chuffed Poems


Two To Tango Ii

Long dreams
Alternate seems

Short happiness
Emerges snappiness

Sweetly savory
Faith bravery

Glossily scuffed
Hardly chuffed

Heat cracked
Odds stacked 

Ignitable flame
Hope's aim

Pair required
Thoughts rewired

Both rediscovered
Love recovered
Categories: chuffed, poetry, writing,
Form: Couplet

Workout

Panting and puffing I’m feeling the burn
Even though I’ve done only a minute
This machine is the work of the devil I’m sure
Oh god, I think I might vomit

I’m treading the mill to try and get fit
But I think this thing’s going to kill me
My bosom is heaving I’m sweating like mad
All this jiggling…. I now need a wee…

Increasing the incline and upping the speed
My little legs pumping like crazy
I feel the weight lifting I’m floating on air
Oohhh… every thing’s going quite hazy

Finally, slowly, it grinds to a halt
I’ve done TEN WHOLE MINUTES … can’t talk
Although I’m all wobbly I’m feeling quite chuffed
Maybe one day I’ll jog, not just walk
© Kaye Locke  Create an image from this poem.
Categories: chuffed, health, humor,
Form: Rhyme

True Friends

****** TRUE FRIEND*****
Yes, indeed you are
You are my brother
Despite our blood and race difference
We met from no where
But it seems we getting some where
Even if it turns not to be a causality
Then our friendship type will be scanty
Hail to the causative if only there is one
For letting me find a true chum like you

I love you my peerless pal
Cuz yov've delivered me from the darkness of loneliness
And making me feel the benefit of togetherness
Not forgetting you saved me from the path of stupidity for opting solitude
But most of all, you are my true friend

I venerate you my dear friend
For the love you've showed me
And forever will I be chuffed to have you
Cuz with you I will unwary
My trust and loyalty will unswerve
Cuz you are nothing but a true friend

You are a quintessence of who a friend is
As you make my nadir become bliss
Because your presence create a mood of delirious
And a state of delirium
Forever will I remain in your debt

Am a stalwart because you made me
For you brought love like I've never known
You are my shelter from troubled winds
And my anchor in life's ocean
Depicting an assurance of safety

You are always strong when am tired and weak
As you always inspire and motivate me to greatness
And under your tutelage, I embrace success and prosperity
So my promise is to always recall your help and support
Above all, you are my true chum
#@cj2015#
Categories: chuffed, friendship,
Form: Blank verse

Book: Radiant Verses: A Journey Through Inspiring Poetry


Premium Member Memories of Christmas Past

Christmas memories come flooding back
Just  a few small gifts in my Santa sack
In the toe there’s an orange and a sugar mouse
I’d hide the mouse to scare mum in the house

Some chocolate coins wrapped in gold foil
And some coloured balls containing bath oil
A box of jelly slices in orange and yellow
In truth I much preferred mashmallow!

Larger presents are piled beneath the tree
Always a board game for all the family
My favourite gift was such a  surprise
The cutest teddy with sweet brown eyes

I hugged my teddy, and named him Fritz
I can’t stop grinning, I’m chuffed to bits

A Christmas Gift Memory Poetry Contest


Sponsored by BJ Legros Kelley 

12/18/21
Categories: chuffed, childhood, christmas,
Form: Rhyme

True Love

My tussle with nature will be fruitless
If not for that, I will ask for a millennia
Just to spend my life with you
I will make our love awestruck for your progeny
And posterity will make us a monument
To hail always till the end of time
Romeo and Juliet will be exchange with our names
And the act of Delilah will be extinct
Trust will be our backbone
Faithfulness will be our weapon
And loyalty will always forever shield us
You know why?
Because our love lingers than the day’s sunlight
And even surpasses that of the nights moonlight
seldom will there be fighting or quarreling
Because of our perfection
which strengthens our affection
I love you my peerless pal
Because you’ve delivered me from the darkness of loneliness
And you’ve made me feel the benefit of togetherness
Not forgetting you saved me from the path of stupidity for opting solitude
I venerate and salute you 
For you brought love like I have never known
And that has made me chuffed to have you
for with you I will unwary
As my trust and loyalty will forever unswerve

You are a quintessence of what true love is
As you made my nadir become bliss
 Your presence create a mood of delirious
And also a state of delirium

Am a stalwart because you made me
because you brought love like I've never known
you were my shelter from troubled winds
And my anchor in life's ocean

Have you forgotten you were always strong when I was tired and weak
As you always inspired and motivated me to greatness
Ha, and under your tutelage, I embrace success 
As you even raised my flag to be highest
You push me to the apex of prosperity
And you even raised my status to that of a celebrity
I will forever recall your love and support
for your handiwork is that only of a true love
Yes indeed you are 
You are nothing but a true love
Categories: chuffed, love,
Form: Blank verse

Claire Cunningham

Claire won 5 medals at the Barcelona Paras, 
In 1992, where she took the 50m freestyle gold, 
To set a World Record, and in the 100m pass, 
Still freestyle, she secured a warm silver fold,

A silver for the 100m backstroke and 4x100 relay,
Which made her extremely proud, chuffed no end, 
So she only took up para-triathlon 2008, recently, 
And in 2008, the Worlds, she won the gold blend. 

In 2013 at the ETU Para-triathlon Europeans, 
In Antalya in Turkey, Claire won the solid silver, 
And in 2014, the ITU Worlds with London johns, 
Claire came home 3rd, a bronze to weather. 

2015 and the ITU Worlds again, in Edmonton, 
Canada, and Clare truly proved again to be, 
Successful at the triathlon with consolidation, 
Of another bronze medal, podium victory to see. 

That same year in Buffalo City at the Worlds, 
She won the title, and at the GBR Nationals, 
She came 2nd, also at the ITU London Worlds, 
Then 3rd at the ETU Geneva European stiles. 

1st in Detroit at the ITU Worlds, and then 2nd,
In Penrith in 2016 at more ITU Worlds again;
She finished 4th in Lisbon, Portugal - her bend,
Towards swimming, biking and running did pen. 

She was born without a left forearm, prosthetic, 
And was a Chartered Accountant. She reads, 
Watches box sets, loving West Wing frenetic,
And hates mice. She has English Lit MA seeds.
Categories: chuffed, sports, strength,
Form: Quatrain


Lost Soul

Lost Soul

We’ve gathered here to say goodbye
to yet another boring guy,
kept on yelling for attention
till it gave him hypertension.
Now in the box beneath the shroud
he’s got the eye of all the crowd,
best leading role he ever had, 
but no applause and no one’s sad.

Old mourners sprinkle ancient pews,
ill fitting suits and pee-stained trews,
some glasses, dentures, aching backs
with makeup plastered in the cracks.
They kneel for prayers on creaking limbs
then silent lips mouth unknown hymns.
The dead man’s peers in church are few.
Who pays respects where none seem due?

His painted widow in her weeds 
now wonders who will sate her needs
with hubby just about to burn
and end up ashes in an urn.
She never grudged the man his health,
content enough to share the wealth,
but pleased this sudden turn of fate
serves up his helping on a plate.

Poor vicar wonders what to say.
about this stiff that’s come his way.
He’s no great speeches in reserve
just... bless a saint and damn a perv.
He settles for the standard rite
then tells the crowd they’ll be all right,
“beyond the stars lie happy lands, 
so love your neighbour all shake hands.”

Corpse’ brother sitting cap in hand,
chief mourner in this dismal band,
now ponders on the decent wait
before a widow has a date.
Just wants to get her into bed
but cash and sex means getting wed,
been dodging that since leaving school
concludes that life is Goddamn cruel.

Sister of the spurned cadaver
cannot stand all this palaver.
She didn't like the man in life,
all flashy cars and tarty wife. 
Deep down she’s feeling rather chuffed
for all his din he quietly snuffed.
Same cap fits the other brother,
clone of father, not his mother.

This woman weeping by the door
floats back in time to years of yore,
dreams of a lovely friend at school,
so kind and gentle fun and cool,
who shared a secret both held tight
that seemed to change him overnight.
He truly was a super lad
until abused by evil dad.
Categories: chuffed, abuse, bereavement, family, humanity,
Form: Free verse

The Red Boat

The boat drifted in one Summer’s day
Painted red no one aboard today
The fisherman found it on the shore
And took it home deciding ownership would be ignored

And he didn’t hear anyone was missing a boat
So he felt safe to use it being chuffed to gloat
He rigged it up and used it to fish in the bay
Setting out to sail on a sunny day

A couple was walking on the beach
And they saw the boat on the bay out of reach
They wondered who was with the fisherman then
As there was two people at the boat’s end

The next day on the beach of a seaside town
A red boat washed to the shoreline to be found
And a fisherman found the boat with no one around
So he took the boat hoping that the owner could not be found.

© Paul Warren Poetry
Categories: chuffed, horror, poems,
Form: Ballad

Hard Work Vs Greed

She is young, She is eager, She is the stepping stones to your success ... 

With perseverance and continuous applications,
She finally gets the call, She has the  job,
She is a cleaner,
She is the helper, But

She cleans with passion,
A smile on her face and a song in her heart,

At your call, She is there,
You can see the appreciation on her face,
the twinkle of hope in her eye,

She know's she is capable of so much more,
While you come to the realization that you have scored,

Jumping at the opportunity, You give her the one thing she has been yearning for,

Her prayers for experience have been answered,
Her dedication, her motivation and her Soul is put into your Empire,

Your decision was made,
Very chuffed with yourself,
You offered minimum wage,

You should be ashamed
Categories: chuffed, africa, business, career, hope,
Form: Free verse

They Took More

This poem I dedicate to the people in my 
household the night our home was invaded by two 
men 


Its 3:41 soaked in fear
We are ordered to hide near
They crushed what was once my home
And removed any remainder of peace
The gates rattle send a fearful and cold shrill
They stole a  "TV"
But if they only knew !
That they stole a 12 year old's security
Horror climbed the stairs
Through what could have been
If they shot us dead 

That night will always remain dark
Shots were fired !
We were chuffed into a cupboard
Three children unknown to what was occurring
I Heard my mothers panic 
God seemed to hear her call
One shot but 7 mentally bruised
Left with confused faces asking what next ?
For a moment we seemed to be lost

A "Tsotsi" stole more than a TV
That night he stole innocence and peace
He stole a young boys sense of security
What do we think that a gun defines power
Since its existence 
We think it justifies the injustice
It removes the stains of hate
It soothes the insanity of the mind
It is the easy way out
It is protection
Well with the many reasons it has
One is, its a reality of death
Categories: chuffed, fearnight, night,
Form:

Premium Member In a Split Second

In a split second, life can be snuffed
Unforeseen events cause misery
Why this is so, ‘tis a great mystery
Of such our lives are suitably stuffed
None of us should ever be bluffed
Accidents are main features of history.
In a split second,
The role of accidents is often sloughed
We are victims of information trickery,
Believing what we hear becomes primary
Facetiously, going through life chuffed,
In a split second.  

(R a) b b a a b R a b b a R)

Written October 1, 2022
[Rondine, a form I learned
from writings of Jeff Kyser]
Categories: chuffed, death, fate, life,
Form: Other

Poems For Trump Number 50 Cousin Donald

Cousin Donald Comes to Town ...

Elroy was all cock-a-hoop cos
cousin Donald was a-comin'
a visiting & they were so darn
chuffed & tremblin' in anticipation
that friday night the seven of them
in the one bed had a real problem
actually sleeping.

Ma got out the best crockery
& had it laid out on the flag
hoisted down from the old
post by the front door &
Jebediah had just come back
from huntin' with some real
dandy lookin' coons.

As Eula was busy a-skinnin'
& all the clan was gatherin'
in their finest quilted smocks
& threadbare suits usually
kept for best & courtin' on
Saturday afternoons.

Cousin Donald's limousine
had a problem gettin' up
the windy road so Sam &
old Benjamin were carrying
him along in a sort-of-home-made
palanquin constructed from
pine poles and a large
crate that mama usually
reserved for storing the
winter jams & pickles,

All the boys started a-hollerin'
& a-whoopin' as Cousin
Donald turned the corner
& his loud Orange face
broke into a broad slightly
deranged grin for he knew
that the moment would soon
come when the shine would
flow & they'd get down to
some serious jigging &
fiddlin' but of course he'd
not be the fiddler on account
of his tiny fingers & innate
inability to be able to learn
one damn thing at all.

Cousin Donald restored in them
that pure American ideal of being
able to make it big in this world

& they all told themselves that
if Cousin Donald could do it they
could too meaning a golden
crapper & shiny brocaded
curtains & silver toothbrushes
& diamond watches & silk
drawers & leopard skin pill
box hats.

Oh Cousin Donald inspired them
just so oh yes he surely did & this
day would be re-told over camp
fires and cross-burnings for months
no, years to come,
... the day Cousin Donald came a
visiting.

Oh so blessed, blessed day
& thankyou Sweet Lord Jesus,
thankyou.
Categories: chuffed, political,
Form: ABC

Malcee - the Bestest Beerman In the West Part 1

For a chum on the occasion of his 50th birthday.  lots of insider jokes I am afraid! The meter totally stolen :-)

You could hear the engine roar, As the van approached the door
And the squealing of the brakes, pedal pressed onto the floor
And he drove right into St john's Street, K&A upon his chest
His name is Malcolm, and he drives the bestest beer van in the west 

Now Malcolm loves a girly, A lady he knows as Kar
She lived all alone in Stroud, but  knew her way around a bar
She knew just where to pull just right and which end she had to tweak 
So Malcolm got his firkin there three times every week
They call him Malcolm 
(mallkkeeeeee)
And he drives the bestest beer van in the west

She said she'd like to bathe in beer he said then I'm your man
so when he finished work one night he loaded up the van
He said do you want some gluten-free, it'll help you with your gout,
she said Malcolm gimmee savernake, I'll take the stout without
That chuffed old malcyyy 
(Malceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee)
and he drives the bestest beer van in the west 

Ahh ooooo

Malc's life is often confused, like when he went to Limburg,
He drove the van there all the way,  but later was a real nerd,
having parked it up on his return he cried like a banshee
'Cause when he searched both high and low he could not find the keys

So Malc called Kar, and she Andy, a plan they did concoct
They flew her out to Limburg quick, so the van could be unlocked,
But on the windscreen of that van, they found a note in Kraut
The keys were found hurrah -  it was no longer a van without!
They call them Scluesheln, 
(ke---eee---eys!)
And they locked the bestest beer van in the west.
aaa ooo

Now Malc likes to plan and dream, coming up with ventures new,
From brew'ries and micropubs, selling the beer he likes to brew
He has strong thoughts, partlicularly against religion,
Though that doesn't stop him liking one particular Christian!
The call him Henry...  
(henreeee!)
And he plays the bestest guitar in the west (and north and south and east!)
....
(See Pt. 2!)
© The Didds  Create an image from this poem.
Categories: chuffed, birthday, friend,
Form: Free verse

Premium Member Cath the Crazy Cat Lady

Cath is totally besotted with her five pussycats,
their cute ears stick out from under blue hats.
She dresses them in brightly colored plastic suits,
and on their paws they wear red wellington boots.

Cath’s kittens, all have colorful jackets to wear,
She takes the cats ’walkies’, oh how people stare.
When Cath gets them home she brushes their fur,
with their tails held high they all gently purr.

She minces best fillet steak for their dinner,
whilst the pussies get fat, old Cath gets thinner.
Spinster Cath’s never been a mother or a wife,
so her adorable cats have taken over her life.

One day little Archie ran out of the door -
he’d never been out on his own before,
Sadly poor Archie didn’t get very far
as the cute little cat was killed by a car.

Cath arranged for him to be mounted and stuffed
when she saw the result she was really chuffed!
Dear Archie now lies in such sweet repose
and Cath just can’t resist tickling his pink nose.

Crazy cat Lady Contest
Sponsored by Line Gauthier

01/06/18
Categories: chuffed, cat, humorous, pets,
Form: Rhyme

Premium Member Take a Powder

Go away, Today,
You have overstayed your stay.
You think you're tough,
We've had enough it's been rough,
It's time to go.
Go now,
We can't allow
This bedlam to last,
You've had your day,
Just vanish, we say
Be a memory of our past.
Shove off!!
Oh! you've acquired a cough,
From someone you infected.
How do you feel?
Do you feel ill?
Has Human breath been detected,
A virus in you,
That is new?
Caught, from a human being,
It's our breath that causes your death,
We can't believe what we are seeing,
A vicious virus,
Is not desirous,
To anyone on Earth.
We've invented a puffer,
A virus snuffer,
That will kill and stop future births.
As we wave goodbye,
We all breathe a sigh,
All feeling very chuffed,
Who would have thought we'd kill the virus,
Who was so desirous,
With a Super Sniffer Puff.
Categories: chuffed, 10th grade,
Form: Rhyme
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Book: Radiant Verses: A Journey Through Inspiring Poetry

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