Best Astraddle Poems

Life's valued treasures, I hold most dear,
the ones that dwell deep within my heart.
There's a special memory from younger days
that I will share with you, and fondly impart.

When I think as far back as I can, I remember,
there was only one special thing I ever...

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Cowboyin' seems so romantical as seen in th' pitcher shows.
Ain't a lick uv truth in that as ever' workin' cowpoke knows.
Movie stars is paid big bucks with a fancy saddle fer thar horse,
An' always ride off into th' sunset with a purty gal, uv course!

Real...

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Hank had cowboyed on the Triple T Ranch fer nigh on fifty years.
He'd rode the range herdin' beef peerin' betwixt his hoss's ears.
Durin' cattle stampedes he'd broke bones and many a time was throwed,
And he'd been astraddle his saddle so long that his legs was...

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He crawled from his bunk stiflin' a hearty yawn.
His work began each day at the very crack of dawn.
He donned his jeans, chaps and old slouch hat,
Pulled on his cowboy boots and strapped on his gat!

He downed a bowl of Cheerios which was his usual...

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The ol' saddle warn't much to look at but it was all Buck could afford.
He paid Billy five bucks fer it when Billy died and loped to his eternal reward!
The saddle fit his hoss Dan like an ol' shoe and sat Buck's buttocks mighty well!
Fer...

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Cowpoke Hank hired on fer a dollar a day and found.
He wuz knowed as the best bronc-buster around!
They wuz allus a roll-yer-own a-danglin' frum his lips,
And he wore a pair of 44 shootin' arns on his hips.

He wuz lean and lank and had spent nigh...

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A Welsh Girl who loved Rock 'N Roll
Had little or no self-control
She flew off to France
Where she split her pants
Astraddle Le Grand Merhin Dol...

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Slim was pigeon-toed and bow-legged from allus bein' astraddle,
Of his faithful hoss Old Dan and his well-worn creakin' saddle!
He'd spent 30 years gazin' twixt Old Dan's ears ridin' the spread.
Now both is retired and he took up writin' cowboy poetry instead!

On the porch of the...

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We stopped fer a bite at the Gooseberry Patch, I reckon it wuz a week er so ago.
I wuz slurpin' my usual bowl uv chili - Boys! That stuff'll set yer ears aglow!
My spouse wuz toyin with her salad anticipatin' a slab uv gooseberry pie,
When...

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Of all the horses I have known,
And I have known a few,
It's of Rebel, my daughter's first loved horse
That I'll be telling you.
Her girl friends on the nearby farms
Had horses theirs to ride.
That she could not have a horse too,
She just could not abide.
We lived...

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The sonorous voice of God woke Jonah from his siesta one fine day,
Saying, "Arise! Get ye to Nineveh and I'll brook no delay!
I've volunteered you to go there and preach in that wicked town,
The people are very unruly - they need a good dressing down!"

"No...

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Have you heard about cowpoke Clapsaddle?
,
   He rode fer years on his horse astraddle.

      His legs was badly bowed,

         And he walked pigeon-toed.

       ...

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While riding my bike down a lane
I felt an incredible pain
I was astraddle
Without my saddle
That's something I won't do again!...

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Hank rested his boots on the railin' of the bunkhouse when day was done.
The pointy-toes of his scruffy boots framed the slowly settin' sun.
He leaned back in his rockin' chair, his hands embracin' the back of his nape,
Contemplatin' his tattered boots, (tho' they was still...

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Now its purty well knowed that cowpokes prefer to ride a horse,
An' movin' pitchers show 'em astride prancin' horses of course.
But Hank, a cow-puncher fer many years ain't like th' usual pack;
He prefers to mount a cantankerous mule that he calls Jack!

Ol' Jack sets th'...

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