Best Assembly Poems
I whizzed past the assembler, add
count in octal, subtract
hexadecimal. Found error
in the dump file, all zeroes
and wondered, is this an omen?
Surprise! write me an algorithm
for a full third of test score.
Sort all data in a file
swap and exchange,
compare and relate.
Loop through the right number
and oh, woe for me, I get a C plus.
The highest in the class,
all doomed to retake the section
except me, who passes.
But the A and B slip away
because I never set my counters,
important counters full of junk
all back to zero. Zero the clean
state of all beginnings.
Programmers learn by trial
and error, one pass,
one dump and oh, yeah,
zero out the counters
Or face certain demise.
Holi, a hearty enthusiastic festival in horizon
Colours curdling, water washing every moron;
Out of us evil ever going and playing on
Land of character cherished by coloured lawn.
What a scene to see! Gracious glory gone
If you miss this mesmerizing festival upon
A folly. Foolish will be called such a conn.
Holi, a hearty enthusiastic festival in horizon
Holy played in school is highly pleasing crayon,
For Kinar, Aayushi, Kunal. Aryan or John.
Monorhyme has one colour, holi many micron.
Mital, Mitesh, Vaikhu, SIddhu, Saurabh are don.
This day even principal thinks to prevent throne
And join joy with teachers - see anxiety thrown.
Holi, a hearty enthusiastic festival in horizon
Songs, screams; dance, D.J.; homage and hymn on;
This day with Holika heavy burdens and sins thrown.
Cruel Hiranyakashyapa was killed; glory was won.
Kunal, Arpita, Sandeep, Amit and Shreyas on lawn
Play water and colours with cool Pari’s scone
In Jalgaon, Agra, Kanpur, Karanja, Surat or Bonn.
Holi, a hearty enthusiastic festival in horizon
Welcome to the Motown Motor City,
asphalt carpet ghetto grind
Automated fated urban living,
everyday inner-city surviving
Hard mean streets handing out no pity,
sharpens perceptive razor minds
Last stop underground freedom giving,
all-day Exodus gospel arriving
Factory-built hearts living manufactured dreams
Black Bottom be a lowly place to start,
Paradise Valley is a forgotten vision now a-rising
Assembly line tough, steel mental parts
Perseverance is Detroit revival defined,
no assembly required
Citizens report any municipal malfeasance
Just another urban spiritual capital gain,
congregation assembly required
Motown cars moving on a heavenly transport train
But you must be counted in attendance thereof,
to know the love song we were singing
God helped us to overcome every paved obstacle
In all schools, there is assembly conn
Which directs the class or school yon
Expectations of all – trustee – the swan:
Choosing topics and teachers from Taiwan.
Keeping updates is teacher’s duty since eon
So is the assembly to represent omicron.
Different themes or topics about nylon
All are dealt in assembly now and forlorn.
Hence is the theme of Creativity chosen
By Divine Child School in Mehsana anon.
This will go on till students change begone
Illiteracy, agedness, negative mindset, wan.
Faintly falling in failing flight-
En route to crash in Death's Delight!
(To be blown apart, 'tis a better start)
Than to travel back and make things right
Verbless old haikus
Eastern tradition how-to’s
Making me feel blue
By Robb A. Kopp
All Rights Reserved © MMX
Hey s'up Joe? You bring the beer?
Yup, I'll set it here within our reach.
You know, we've been at this a year..
I see you got that last part complete.
This book sure was a nice find, Bill.
Yeah, though I'm not sure about these kits.
What ya mean?. Hand me that wrench...
This section gotta be sterile; put on yer mitts.
Okay..use the forceps, it's tricky..don't flinch.
Alright..install..hardware and secure into ..main assembly...
How?! ...What?!... You gotta be a liar!
Now, ya made me nervous, my hands are all trembly.
Huh! Yup. Says right there..use bailing wire!
This is critical,.. gimme the pliers.
Okay, it says to install this thing over here.
Install it?! ..I cant even pronounce it!
But I'll try it... Hand me another beer.
Now solder the what to the who?
That thing-ama-gig to the whatzit rod?
Oh I get it .It all makes sense now,.. I think.
Then this gets installed into the Pod.
Flap A goes into center slot C,
Oh now it's comin' together!
That's so tab B can slip on into slot D!!
High fives! Let's grab another brew!
'Nother four cases or so and I'll be waivin' by by!
Yep, hook that whatyacallit to the computer and Presto!
And then, Buddy, you'll be flying high!
What you thinkin' on? Why you drinkin' so slow?
Well, ..do your neighbors still think this is a Silo?
Ah don't worry,.. they're just a couple of rummies,
or else. ..they would have kept this book, Joe!....
On "How To Build a Spaceship For Dummies"!
Some Assembly Required
By Elton Camp
If a product has these words, better stay away
Unless you want to toil on it at least half a day
Pages of instructions the maker will provide
And a list of parts that are said to be inside
Expect the tiny print to be impossible to read
There will never be all of the parts you need
And the wording will be ignorant and crude
Due to having been written by a foreign dude
If to sell to the American market they aspire
You’d think a good translator they’d hire
There will be unfamiliar terms and complexity
“Insert dowel A into the crescent arch at three”
To purchase a complete product I much rather
And so I never buy one I must put together
It comes with the instructions
Listing every single step
And if there is a problem,
You can call the service rep.
The hardware's all included -
Every nut and bolt and nail -
Yet still, when self-assembling,
You should prepare to fail.
For few stay calm when things don't work
And many go ballistic.
My theory is the manufacturers
Are just sadistic.
So somewhere in a foreign land,
They pack a few wrong screws
Or illustrate instructions
In a way meant to confuse.
And then they sit around and laugh
As boxes leave the shelves,
Filled with stuff they know we can't
Assemble by ourselves.
There's only one solution
And although you'll pay much more,
The next time, purchase something
Put together in the store!
A mere whisper of a mortal is a card on a tree. Unopened. Oh what godly prowess is occurring at this time. At this the thistle of time where Theremins and terrapins catch thermometers in spins. Justification is rife. Short day is not a short night and a large whale in a pram or a cot cannot join large amounts of watered down conversation. Move not a mingling mangy moggy into a sack of potatoes as fish is the prefered diet for many of a meow meow. And next the time for the bouncy sun to call upon the planets laden with dinner trays. And all this whilst the giggling goo goo berries are in line formation. Monetary mingling making messy musical mirages. And pus. Yes pus. Oyster. Mr Oliver Oyster does not appreciate such dreadful catatonic category codes. So don't wash dishes in a four foot ball gown. Rapid is the eye that moves thrice. And circles a planetarium. Good isn't it?. Clever isn't it. Very structured isn't it? But when a ring donut carries a pixie on a hot day to a castle it is said there is much whistling. And a bird laughing in a tree. Dance. Good. Goodnight equals good afternoon and also good morning as an aura salutes an aura. Reconfiguration Z
we crimp
we stamp
all
bang bang
day
putting parts
to
bang bang
gether
thinking only
of our
bang bang
coffee
break
(On the Mother’s day)
Born out of my mother’s womb,
My hazed eyes of the present day
Converge the soft soil of this samsara
Feeling the amorous warmth
Of illimitable and immeasurable
I'm quite conscious of.
Grown up I'm
In the tough and sturdy legs
Massaged by the pure oil
Of immeasurable mind.
Matured I’m as the absolute man -
The conception of
My affectionate motherhood.
In the time passing by,
When my mother turned
Old enough to fragility and frailty,
Then my mindful memory
Erased my own childhood -
The nam* and roop*
Of my mother in me.
I'm occupied this much
To set myself morally uprights,
Bemused I’m in my right
To concede you like my own,
Stayed far away from your presence.
The suffering you confronted
In your old and fragile body,
My nature of looking intently at you
Fell down your mind into despair.
When my mind stuck in
Brahma Bihar, the Assembly of Divinity,
I grasped you utterly.
Alas! You were then only
A lustrous star in the sky.
Merely for a day of each year,
Contentment flaunted in me by
Peeping your Nam and Roop
In me and mine
In the beholding mirror
Of the immeasurable universe.
*
Bramha Vihar, also called Chatu Bramha Vihar –
The assembly of Divinity or immeasurable
in Buddhism has four moral virtues, namely
Loving Kindness (Metta), Compassion (Karuna),
Sympathetic Joy and Equanimity (Upekkha)
Samsara – The material world
Nama – Mind and mindfulness
Rupa – Shape or form
Sleepy Sanctuary was awakened from the night
By sheepish rays of morning light.
Silence was stirred from its slumber, too,
As ripples and blurs disturbed the deep blue.
Irony came forth as I peered at their waddle.
"Goodness," I said, "they look like bottles."
All clothed in formality, they seemed very tame,
And that protruding belly made me exclaim:
"How unlikely for them to be in this place;
Out of their world they are a disgrace!"
Yet, orderly they were-and when they were done,
They waddled back as decrepitly as when they had come.
Back in their world, they were adept once again;
They might be back, but no one knows when.
You're probably wondering if the Church this might be.
Certainly not-It's a Penguin Colony.
Stressed/unstressed syllables (ten to a line,
remember!) take their turns. Fourteen in all
(that’s lines, not syllables), which often fall
in blocks of eight and six. You’ve got that? Fine.
Now for the rhymes. Petrarchans intertwine
like this, in staggered couplets, as they sprawl
the page. Americans are apt to call
Shakespearians, “English” sonnets. These align
in neat alternatives, until the end,
which forms a rhyming couplet. The sestet
(the six-line bit) has ordered rhymes, which tend
to vary. Feminines are lines that get
a final, unstressed, syllable tacked on it.
And there, in fourteen lines, you have a sonnet.
Do you ever think about film characters in the realms of reality?
Think about someone like Grima Wormtounge making Saruman a pot of tea?
What about the eye of Sauron trying to find someone to play monopoly or Frodo, giving the ring to Gollum so he can go just home for tea?
Ever think about the characters with their nail clippers, getting waxed or brushing their teeth?
Imagine Rambo with a lawnmower that’s gone faulty?
Or what about The Terminator assembling IKEA furniture quietly?
Ok, try to picture Deadpool trying to find something to wear to a fancy dress party.
What about the ‘man with no name’ listening to the payment options for a flat-screen TV?
Now, what about James Bond getting pissed on your settee or Jason Bourne, bag in hand, waiting to see if the dog just wanted a pee?
Do you ever think of film characters in the realms of reality or is it just me?