Best Abner Poems

...Lil Abner

There was never a feature in all the world,
Like "Lil Abner" for chasing the blues,
It takes this romantic comic strip,
To really make the news!

I'm always quite excited when our
......

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...For forty-three years Lil Abner ignored the voluptuous Daisy Mae
In Al Capp’s comic strip about the good folks of Dogpatch USA
I remember as a child thinking all women should look like she.
And wo......

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...Oh… how I miss that time! With it’s Saturday morning cartoons.
Not to mention, daily comics stolen from Papa’s newspaper, too!
Saturday was way better! With Snoopie, Little Abner, and friends.
Now......

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...When the Boss Says, “See me”

By Elton Camp

Abner eyed the sticky note on his report with unease
In twenty years with the firm, hadn’t seen one of these

Grapevine was saying the boss had a n......

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......The devil didn’t hide, he strutted right out,
a smile painted on his red face.
“Why my dear sheriff, how in the world
Did you ever find my new place?”
Abner stared on, seething with hate.

“......

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...David gat himself up and wives,
And did in transportation thrive.
That the philistines had governed,
Isreal,Hebron,and all urban.
Then he entreated God for his land,
And the Lord was entreated o......

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...In eighteen hundred ninety-three,
back in those silver-mining days,
a figure walked into Aspen town,
and it was the devil they say,
come looking for new souls to take.

He didn’t look like you ......

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...That stuff we slurp up like there's no tomorrow
Is called “Kickapoo Joy Juice” a name I borrowed
From Al Capp's Li'l Abner
A strip from another era
For 43 years till Al Capp passed away t......

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...After moments she shook her head,
then moved over to the brick hearth,
a strew cooked over glowing coals,
she threw more spuds in for her part.

Then came over to the main room,
and sat herself......

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......Emmet just sat down on a bench,
And gratefully took his boots off,
Just stretched himself out there to rest,
for the moment it was enough.

The woman seemed confused by this,
it was clear sh......

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...Opening Day with a Little Delay

Take me out to the ball game
 Of balls and strikes - bloopers and perfect games; 
 Basket catches, ERA’S, country hardball;
 Foul balls, the pick off, intentiona......

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......Emmet would converse with Sophie,
pretend he was a normal man,
while April and Abner slipped away…
young infatuation was grand.

And after their third time out there
April and Abner were eng......

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...Dogpatch
Daisy Mae
Little Abner
T. Cornpone USA
Al Capp......

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......Though in closing, it must be said
they did not remain there for long.
A damned Yankee wed to a Reb?
The locals all declared it wrong.

Like many others they went west,
and made Colorado the......

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...His name was Emmet Patterson,
and back in 1863,
he led a cavalry unit
patrolling deep in Tennessee.

The state was firm in Union hands,
Tte Civil War in its third year,
but the threat of parti......

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