A DRUG ADDICT'S LAMENT
KENSINGTON AVE IS WHERE I FIX
A PLACE WHERE LADIES PLY THEIR TRICKS
BUT UNDERSTAND THERE IS A FEE
KENSINGTON AVE IS NEVER FREE
WALKING NOW I’VE GOT THE SHAKES
GET THERE SOON IS ALL IT TAKES
THE CITY HAS ME IN A RUT
EMPTINESS ROLLS AROUND MY GUT
JUDY’S THERE SHE DOESN’T CARE
FAST EDDIE HAS HIS DISTANT STARE
AND THEN THERE’S ME NOT MUCH TO SEE
I WALK WITH LONG LOST DIGNITY
THREE TIMES I QUIT BUT DIDN’T FIT
WITH PEOPLE WHO SURROUNDED ME
BUT WHEN I GOT THAT SPECIAL DRUG,
LIFE TO ME WAS JUST A SHRUG
I’M SWEATING NOW BUT STILL FEEL COLD
A PART OF COMING DOWN I’M TOLD
I’M SLOWING NOW AND FEELING PAIN
BUT SOON I’LL BE ON HAPPY LANE
KENSINGTON CALLS OUT TO ME
JUST LIKE LADY LIBERTY
GETTING RIGHT IS JUST THE KEY
TO LET MY TORTURED MIND BE FREE
AND AS I THIRST TO LIFT THE CURSE
THAT’S ALWAYS BEEN A PART OF ME
RETURN I MUST BECAUSE I LUST
TO PUT THAT DRUG INSIDE OF ME
AND AS IT ENTERS THROUGH THE SKIN
IT BECOMES MY SPECIAL FRIEND
BUT NOW I KNOW IT WON’T BE LONG
BEFORE MY SPECIAL FRIEND IS GONE
KENSINGTON CALLS OUT TO ME
IT DRAWS ME LIKE A FLAME
IT SINGS ITS SWEET SONG OUT TO ME
BUT ALWAYS ENDS THE SAME
some people love being " in love"
are perpetually in love
their cars and houses sing of it
their pets and children
take a back seat as
they are all about this new
fresh never-had-before feeling
They exist and survive solely
on the unique emotion of being in love
Unfortunately, being-in-love stales, and
molds up, and puts itself into
a comfortable state eventually.
When this happens, and it always does,
being-in-love addicts have to
move on - find a new love because it is the
"this is all new and I love it" feeling of being
"in-love" that twirls their heart.
These hunters and gatherers are not yet ready for the "sit around the house next to your best friend, enjoying a big bowl of chili" kind of love. Breaking another's heart, is of no concern, either. They need their "fix".
So they return to the hunt, seeking another who
wants to be "in love". They usually find them too.
First before you say anything, I'm in love with my husband but the drug addiction gets hard to watch. *Possible trigger warning*
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Bongs, bubbles and needles...
Awake days, even weeks on end
Losing you slowing it's taking you from us...
Sleeping alone to sleepless nights
When will you wake up...
Childhood pain, losing those you care about, so much sadness
Numbing the pain to cope...
Slowly fading away, pulling, pushing...
Though I know the reason I do not know the hold that it has on your soul...
Please come back to us, losing you is a nightmare only getting worse by the day...
By your side always, forever protecting you. I love you my love!
in the beginning there be
only...
a plus and a relative minus
then...
calculation of geometric parts
that...
revealed concepts in the minds
make-up...
of parallel thought-form ideas
fostering...
similar change in experiences
of...
so called time-addicts
obsessions...
with a number-able
count...
stans sand
showy sunflowers
natural light towers bright~~
night tides a bent field
I
Don't quit. You will win
Alcoholics Anonymous includes God
The lesson: You have a spirit key
That can take you to victory
Never give in: be it good or dark, addiction
Jesus for me, demoted love as emotion
II
Love is action, a verb
Not Conquest, Souvenir, Trophy to brag
On Facebook, social media, & kick to the kerb
The one you took pictures with: proof
You have what it takes to make IT luv U
So emotional highs & lows are addictions
Though sometimes abuse, not a crime
But I needed Jesus to help me discern
To make good judgment, hard with loved ones
After years of trying, bible education, power
Came in drops & drips: So, beloved don't quit
The good fight: fight for what's Good. Jesus did
Did you know ducks are known as “quack addicts”
Got a million more, three of which I'll now inflict
On my unsuspecting pals
Here on this weird locale
Don't get all squirrely, you guys are hand picked
Did you know ducks are known as “quack addicts”
Got a million more, some of which I'll now inflict
On my unsuspecting pals
Here on this weird locale
Don't get all squirrely, you guys are hand picked>center>
Give me all of one thing, and I’d gladly
give up all of the others.
Not for me the monotony of variety,
the trying, the sampling, the dabbling,
the skimming over surfaces.
Experience is nothing without intensity.
Give me a drowning then,
in a false god, a love, a cause (any), a bottle, a syringe.
Depths to sink to
en route to the peaks of rapture.
Give me freedom from having to make choices,
relief from the responsibility of autonomy,
the solace of surrendering
to that which demands
humility, piety, the soul’s nudity.
Obedience is clarity.
All of life reduced to the totality of me
and the finality of “it”.
Give me the comfort of wanting all of one thing
that wants all of me.
Sitting at home, alone in my room,
thinking to self...today, my doom.
A spoon full of crumbs, a spoon full of stuff,
put out my smoke, done took the last puff.
Looking for the right, the so perfect vein,
I'm doing this now, in to much pain.
The shot has been shot, its quickly away,
no dying right now, no dying today.
The next one will happen, know this to be said,
an addicts pleasure, often..more pain, instead.
Thinking to self...tomorrow, my doom,
sitting at home, alone in my room.
I’ll be the first to admit
It’s most entertaining
To watch drama queens carry on
The passion they express
For the trivial and mundane
Is indeed most amusing
But between you and me
In the reality of everyday
Most prefer what’s predictable
Life seems much more delightful
Without radical highs and lows
And all that drama many do crave
AP: Honorable Mention 2020
Posted on March 6, 2019
Addictive tendencies Looming ...
Relapse time is Blooming ...
Struggling removing thoughts on Using ...
Enhanced temptations Consuming ...
Life isn't supposed to be this Confusion ...
I'm sick and tired of always drug Abusing ...
In hopes that I'll feel a little Whoosing ...
My ADHDs unable to accept Losing ...
Distorted self perception from my Choosing ...
Thoughts of deception starting Cursing ...
Cancerous memories that would haunt Suzan ...
The drugs aren't even that Amusing ...
Complex solutions from situations Fusing ...
Illogucal fears insterted shadowed Illusions ..
Withdrawal consumed struggle Loosing ..
Voices telling me to stop fighting and keep Using ...
But I'm tired of re-runs of self Abusing ..
I rather reign fire on fools Phurusing ..
Settlement of my goals like I'm Sueing ..
Remind myself that doubts over Flowing ...
Beating addiction again without nobody even Knowing ...
Switched lanes never sides loyalty still Showing ...
Let you go No Shame No Apologizes ever Owing ...
It's not hunger for food
And it makes one a fool
It's really nothing good
More like leaving a toddler in a pool
All victims does panic
But they're in as if they get a commission
The actions are so ironic
Leaving one amazed, on the line of division
They do monologues
You really would swear they are mad
If you hear them doing dialogues
The topics don't match the news, it's so sad
They say they steal for a living
Unfortunately the earth so soon is what they end up leaving
We need orphanages
With glass walls,
So adults can
Keep an
Eye,
A mind, and
An ear on each other.
We need orphanages
So children can
Be taken care of,
Get three meals a day,
Feel appreciated, or
At least
Respected.
We need orphanages,
Where adults can help
Children relax, and
Be children, not
Having to be
The adult any more.
We need orphanages
Where children do
Not have to make
Up lies for parents,
Take care of parents,
Or hide from parents.
We need orphanages.
Cable
The electronic pipe
Flowing with bits and bytes
To keep the media ripe
Got to keep the masses
Enjoying the show
Keep them blind
With the digital flow
That delicious little wire
That poisonous snake
Whatever term you like
The truth can’t be faked
And “what is that?” you might say
Why you’re being programmed in every little way
You’re being fed a digital soup
To keep you in line
And out of the loop
We are all slaves of the digital code
All to willing
If I may be so bold
Baited, hooked and caught
Consume, spend, consume
Is what were taught
Click, click, click
My obedient slave
Fear not
I have what you crave
The lights
The sounds
And discounts you follow
All designed to keep you empty and hollow
Don’t forget to follow my latest tweet
It’s the same soul sucking message
Set to repeat
Do you see a pattern here?
It’s quite clear my dear
Your worth for the day
Is what you have available to pay
Quite a mess I must confess
But then again from this world
I expected nothing less
Sad that my expectations are so low
Then again that’s the goal
Of the digital flow
Eric (and sometimes not)
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