"Make it quick" they barked. "We all have to pee."
The cock legged one woofed right back, "Don't rush me!"
Female dogs may have fleas
But they don't wee on trees
Trans surgery gets rid of that weenie!
*Not entered in the contest but I couldn't
stop myself from writing a limerick for that photo.
THE DOG-GED LIE
In a house on a bustling street,
Lived a pup with paws and fur so neat.
His owner, a young lad of just ten,
Made a promise to his furry friend, Ben.
"Dear dog," the boy did solemnly vow,
"I'll confess to my teacher, I swear it now,6
That you munched on my homework, oh so sly,
But please, don't give me that not-guilty eye."
The dog just woofed and wagged his tail,
He knew the boy's plan would surely fail.
But to humor his lazy friend, he played along,
Knowing the outcome would sound all wrong.¹²
The next day at school, in front of the class,
The boy's face turned red, oh what a farce!
"Teacher," he stammered, "I must confess,
My dog ate my homework...oh what a mess!"
The teacher just chuckled and shook her head,
"Nice try, my dear boy," she kindly said.¹8
But the dog at home let out a sly grin,
Knowing he'd never get in trouble for this sin.
And so, the boy and his furry mate,
Shared a phony secret that was so great.
Telling the truth would be tough, so it seem,
The boy & his dog made a fraudulent team.²4
VICK MANUEL POETRY {VMP}
FORM: Rhymes
Copyright ©?January 2024.
a chihuahua kidnapped in maine
found his way all the way home to spain
asked a reporter of note:
you stowed away on a boat?
He woofed: did you think I hopped a train?
12/29/21
My dog was so happy
'till I got me a cat
He cocked his head funny
seemed to ask
~ What is that
It's a companion
I told him
Now go out and play
So they did...
But that was the last time
I saw them that day
Couldn't sleep all night long
Knew that something was wrong
Sure enough, just before dawn
In slinks my dog
With a face two feet long
Where's your companion
I asked, fearing the worst
It was snack-time, my dog woofed
Now can I please quench my thirst
My village was dusty and burning
Everyone was screaming and running
I stood dumb in the chaos, my eyes rolling
Tried to listen out for mother’s calling
The noise of death was the only sound
My pants wetted, a boot pinned me to the ground
My hands numb but clasped behind my head
I started to feel my life fade
I felt all my senses sucked up by the sand
Apart from the smell of fear all around
A deep voice was barking menacingly
I was temporarily oblivious of the captivity
A prayer was too loud in my mind
Asking God to tell mother to leave me behind
To protect my unborn sister and head for the hills
Hell had come to take my childhood against my will
The pacing monster woofed foreign orders
I almost shouted to mother not to fetch the bathwater
Turn your back on your son and head to the border
Run mother, run, I am now a child soldier
Ate a cookie, warm and sweet, with oatmeal and chocolate.
Yum. Yum.
The dog was on my lap in seconds, begging me for some.
No way, girlfriend.
It is not my fault you woofed your candy bar down already.
Problem is, these cookies are individually wrapped
As you unwrap them, they sound like
A Hershey Bar being unwrapped.
Girlfriend’s second favorite sound.
Her first favorite sound is the loud pop
Of the Tupperware container lid as you take it off
The Honey baked ham bowl.
Yes, we do have a spoiled dog.
Clem Kadidlehopper had two whoppers,
Two burgers with the works may be stoppers,
Double meat, egg, beetroot, tomato and cheese,
For a burger connoisseur this could only please,
No problem for Clem and his great big choppers.
alternate last line: Clem woofed them down with his great big choppers.
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