Short Spinster Poems

Spinster life seems paradise..
        whilst married life divulges purgatory..!!

~DEEPA~...

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the spinster
doling out
her advice on love



AP: Honorable Mention 2022

Posted on July 30, 2018...

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Sinister Minister Who Was a Spinster

once knew minister
who we heard was sinister
naughty and sinister

Jim Horn...

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Ambert Emily Dickinson a spinster
her short verse upon us did confer
Without titles she did versify
just one of the convention she does defy...

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Where pigeonholes outnumber pegs
A spinster may get only dregs
But God's Double-Cross
Is like a coin toss:
Cross your fingers or cross your legs!...

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There was a dame from Westminster,
Who lived her life as a spinster.
She was old and gray,
Yelled at cats all day,
And that is why no one missed her....

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There once was a spinster from town
Who decided to marry a clown
She thought him quite funny
Until he robbed all her money
And soon was nowhere to be found...

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A spinster whom just earned her pension
Faced her fate with some apprehension
Though never a bride
She still had her pride
But old men can't jump to attention!...

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Lilian, a Libra,
Looking for lasting love,
Liked Les and luckily
Leo was his star sign 
Looked good until his wife
Laughed at the suggestion
Lilian? Still a spinster
...

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Across the street from the old saloon
Lives an old spinster called June Muldoon
She peeks through her curtain
I’m drunk so I’m certain 
It’s never too soon to moon June...

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A shy, young spinster, named Sue,

felt sad, cause her lovers were few!

        So, she walked out the door,

        wearing a fig-leaf - no more!

Now, she's in bed ... with the flu!...

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Here lived the notorious spinster
Who seduced her naïve minister
An afternoon tryst,
Only happened twice
Back then, it was rather sinister.  

Written August 12, 2022...

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A desperate spinster, Jane took

strong measures the day she would cook

fresh trout. Her date bit

the barb left in it!

He truly was caught on her hook!


4/26/2015...

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Close to the Pre-Raphael sect
All proposals to wed,she did reject;
Her fame excels in retrospect-
A spinster,quiet,pious and chaste
Such talents were,not left to waste.



Tribute to Christina Rossetti...

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Here Lies Mae Brunch

Here lies fat Mae Brunch
Never late for lunch 
A spinster for life
Did she get her ticket punched?

An Epitaph for a laugh 2 Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Jesse Rowe
April 14, 2019...

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Spin Doctor


A crusty old spinster sat stitching
while scratching the parts that were itching
oohing and ahhing
picking and pawing
at least for the moment stopped bitching.


John G. Lawless
3/8/2016...

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She is a spinster
Seventy years of age
and still going strong.

When asked why 
she never married,
She whispered an answer:
“Somewhere in the land
I will never know
my husband was aborted
at the very hour and minute
I was born.”...

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There was once an old spinster named Ruth

    Who was renowned for stretching the truth

       "Tho' many young swains wooed me,

            I could have married" said she,

                "But found them lecherous and uncouth!"...

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Spinster listen;
Do not tell others,
You are spinster,
Tell them this secret,
“I am a Spin-star
A shooting- star
A wonder-star
A humbling- star
A gaming-star
A tempting-star
A smiling-star
A crowning-star
A caring-star
A home-star"...

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Limerick: Once a Barrister hired a Spinster

Once a Barrister hired a Spinster
To work his pump short of a sphincter
She bought piston and nuts
Fixed up the leaking guts
Then Spinster married Barrister’s sister.

© T. Wignesan – Paris, 2013...

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Eleanor. Who was she? 
A spinster. Quiet, aloof, alone.
Well-known yet stealing away to the recesses of her singularity.
An old maid. 
One who navigates through the motions of life. 
Solace or sorrow who would know? 
Sung to the world yet unknown....

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Just pride and prejudice 
Had made her a spinster
As life nowadays is
Competent, hard, cold and cruel
She needs to gamble her life
For a brighter tomorrow
To fight for women's rights
To climb to the top
Without the extra burden of a family
And the control of a gentleman...

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The leaves dancing on the trees. The crinkling steps, the gusts, the natural silence. The unimposing mountains. Laze. Existence that validates itself. Ephemeral, cyclical, beautiful. An old distant friend that you may never truly know. 

I love you because what else would I do...

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The talented Christina Rossetti
wrote carols and much poetry.
Married love elluded her,I'm afraid,
the poor lass dying as a spinster maid

Dante Gabriel Rossetti
a Victorian pre - raphelite ,you see,
with his true love,buried his poetry
but later ....could not let them be....

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hard to read each pun
which will happen upon us
once upon a time

when he was wishing
while line on water swishing
he had been fishing

while at Westminster
really had been sinister
was such a spinster

should hear him squealing
trying to hide true feeling
never appealing
...

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