Short Self Hatred Poems

Nurse my feelings
I'm a child of the slums
The self hatred
I'm trapped in the slums
Bless the finger that writes...

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lost in pensive thought
fire burns all mendacity,
 self-hatred hooked me.
Rid the hateful piercing cries,
intercept thoughts I despise...

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Delusion, confusion does anybody care,
Silence, isolation is there anybody there? 
Frustration, self hatred, all I do is stare,
Defeat, repeat, like a ride at a kids fair....

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I have nothing
but regrets
and memories
 that make me hate myself 
more than I did before,
I feel as if I am in a never-
ending war 
with myself
and I'm losing,
my heart is steadily bruising....

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If one was to strip away
All of your fame
Your worldly riches
And the carefully doctored 
Hollywood
Air brushed pictures
Only the pain would remain
The self hatred and blame
Just you
Exposed
And your
Maiden Name...

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Do you find yourself
under those stones that you’ve thrown
Pummeled with self-hatred
forever alone

Looking up in delirium
Goliath parades
Blinding your vision
—a gravesite charade 

(Dreamsleep: December, 2022)...

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Clouding my heart from the peace I know I should feel,
Anguish and hate tear away inside of me,
With this hate follows only destruction,
With this anguish follows fear,
Will I ever be at peace from myself,
Will peace ever find me....

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Sweet apocalyptic frailty
seeps from weary sighs

Punctuated words we love
or love-words we despise

Body-rocking self-hatred
that drags us from the light

Idealism, perfection
thieves that rape us in the night

Car wrecks and too much sex
things that make us feel

taint of success, abject failure
things that make us real...

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Days of darkness 
Amoung many 
Reluctant souls
Kept locked away 
Never ending
Emotionally drained
Sadened by all
Suddenly dying within

Containment
Resulting in
Enormous
Eruptions
Pertianing to
Self-hatred

While
Infinous others seek
To be
Happy you
Intergrate yourself with horrible
Notions of pain, suffering, and guilt...

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Your words are knives
And I have no more
Smiles to cover the 
Scars.
Hollow eyes stare 
Ahead at a crippled
Future.
Veins full with the
Poison of self-hatred
Pump to your  
Heart.
A life wasted on
The horrors of the world.
A test subject born
To lose.
Added to the number 
Of how many 
Have failed. 
An insignificant death.
4,600...

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Let me clear my mind 
from the issues of life 

Let me clear my mind 
from the trials and tribulations that pass my way

Let me clear my mind
from false realities and the worlds perceptions

Let me clear my mind
from self hatred, and bottle up pride

Let me clear my mind
from the wrong points of view

Let me clear my mind
from all self imprisonment, in my own mind...

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Shrouded in darkness,
Oblivious to the cold,
Thoughts of Demons,
Beginning to take hold.
Joyful memories,
A luxury from the past,
Lucifer stole them,
His shame he did cast.
Love and passion,
No longer exist,
Horrendous pain,
Is next on the list.
Paranoia and self-hatred,
Uncertainty and doubt,
Locked deep inside,
It’s time to let them out.
Express emotions,
Don’t sweat the consequence,
Take time to heal,
Set a precedence....

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She's the same little girl she always was,
Lost and afraid with no one to trust,
The years of torment etched out on her face,
The agony of self hatred with no chance of escape.
Her thoughts are destructive,
Her reflection is sickly,
She hates herself
But that hatred is always hidden so deeply.
The man never notices her silent pain
She tries to show him but always in vain
Who can save this damaged soul?
Only herself because nobody knows....

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I used the pain to weigh me down,
Surround my lungs and hope I’d drown.
Once I’m gone there’s no turning back,
It hurt to think of all that I had.
Most days I wish I could forget,
But the scars I made left me regret.
I cannot hide how I used to feel,
My pure self-hatred was certainly real.
To this day I can carry on,
I’ve learned to love, and learned to be strong.
Yet there are always those days that take me back
To that deep, dark place in the realms of my head....

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As your anxiety becomes alarming. 

You enter a place that is charming. 

As you guard your doom-

There is hope of joy to consume. 

If you speak your innocence. 
 
Your self-hatred will no longer make sense. 

In this world- you are always shifting. 

So that the two islands- past and present- are no longer rifting. 

Your secrets will be shared and never be restored. 

Which creates an embrace so joyful, that your tranquility will soar!

4/5/2022...

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TEMPORAL 

At rainy Lisdoonvarna your red hair was a flare
which guided us to your side
through multi-sensory squalls
when the crowd’s swell parted our company.

I view this photo, perceive the melancholy,
and see the longing now;
to which those ever sparkling eyes,
and my self-hatred had blinded me.

When they find that quantum is bunkum,
I’ll travel there again and tell you
that i am a fool;
that you are a jewel; then
touch your hand,
and see what flares....

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Your so wrapped up in your bubble 
Of self hatred and despair 
That you don’t even stop or consider 
Or look up at what is there

You nod at all the words 
Thinking they are just being kind
Only sourced from pity
They don’t enter your mind

You feel like your imperfect
Your the only one alone
In such a dark deep depression 
You’ve learned to call it your home
But if you looked up, lifted your chin 
You’d be surprised to see
Your bubble of self hatred 
Has also consumed me...

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HELP ME

Her desperate cries, his cries despised, 
carried away by an inward wind.
Lost girl, lost boy, souls now captured,  
in a fraction of a minute, to no end.

New hostage home, all hope is gone,
Haven of a new self hatred.
Can’t even imagine a day of rescue, 
Shame, the new hidden world matrix.

The pleading the coaxing, Malefic one coaching, 
Evidences confirmed, yet sealed.
The balance of justice encroaching.
Faded hope that dreams of rescue will ever be real.

Help me...

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