Short Fu Poems

Call me Lisa
Call me cute
I dont like peppers but i fu**ing love fruit...

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The Master

You have much to learn
Grasshopper. Kung fu, ninja
OK. Start boxing. Tex Wasabi...

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I blame it on life,

But really it's all on me.

You wouldn't believe the fu*cking mess I've made....

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Tsuguhuru Fujita tagged 'Fou 'Fou
cultivated  distinctive look so new
A proto John&Warhol
publicity always his goal
...

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A great cook is one who wears blinkers
With recipes one never tinkers
There are a few
Who dare and do
But results are usually stinkers...

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I caught a quick peek through the Veil
Where angels guide us without fail
I saw my friends
Were bucking trends
Its "human" race Beyond the Pale!...

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A ghost leaps out and shouts boo
Then was hit with a bowl of to-fu
He flew through the air
On a whim and a dare
He landed then called out yoo-hoo...

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My goldfish Finster Darcy
Speaks English but not Farsi
He has an education
And moral reputation
He does kung-fu better than you
He's such an inspiration....

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 There once was a Lion named Lou,
 who thought he was tougher than you.
     He got into a fight,
     On the wrong night,
 and got beat by a kanga-kung fu!


...

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 I only had eyes for you when we met
 and sexy blondes like you make me swoon, pet.
   O’ how we walked hand in hand
   and rolled naked in the sand…
“fu-ck you! That’s my sister, I’m the brunette!”...

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In limerick form is this ditty,

A rhyme not sublime, but it’s witty.

I’m a Word Warrior who

Kicks a rhyme like Kung-fu.

Don’t HAI-ku me. It won’t be pretty!


(For Rhyme Battle Round 5)
and now for the N/A Contest...

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An old gent was tellin' me about how his dad wrote "a dry book" on a given topic, and argued the issue before the Supreme Court. Pretty important dad! And mine? "My dad rescued two hookers during a boxer riot in Kowloon."...

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Thumping away at his typewriter
With the speed of a kung fu fighter
He writes letters, I guess
To complain to the press
He is a most annoying blighter.


-----------------------------
Contest: Funny Limericks
Sponsor: Line Gauthier...

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canada and the u.s. were...
friends and comrades till today
when t-rump made another stupid move by...
imposing a twenty-five% tax on canadian sourced goods
and if this is how tyranasaurus-rump treats close allies then fu-k him...


stan...

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A struggle ensued at the zoo

when King Lion met Jack Kangaroo.

Leo tried to attack,

but Jack fired right back:

"Are you crazy, Cat? I know Kung Fu!"


For Geraldine Taylor's  The Creative Collective Anthology Series - Comic Version...

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Slow down cowboy and reload she mocked
and next time try not to go off half-cocked.
  Then she said with a snig-ger
  you’re too fast on the trigger
but who fu-ckin cares, my world was rocked!

           
            Written: April 2015...

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Betrayal of my Fu, 
Is a knife to heart.
Stabbing so hard, piercing so deep
Makes one's eyes bleed.
                                                        ~Byeol
-------------------------------------------------
Fu: in Chinese used to express for husband...

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Bird in hand will fly away
Catch a fish and eat today

The body is a temple, a house for the soul
A clean heart turns dust into gold

Grasshopper learn how to walk on rice paper
Bend like bamboo tree and jump over skyscraper

God never let you walk alone...

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It was a hot day and when I ran into Tu Fu 
           wearing a big straw hat I asked
           “Tu Fu, how come you’ve grown so thin?
           Are you in agony over one of your poems?”
                                                                   Li Po...

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The “fu” character
Calligraphed on red papers
Ushering in the Chinese New Year
With luck and blessings
Sometimes words are pasted upside down
Fortelling luck and fortunes
Coming your way soon
Besides prayers 
People pursue hopes and dreams
In their own ways...

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When King Lion met Jack Kangaroo,
quite a struggle ensued at the zoo.
Leo tried to attack,
but Jack fired then right back:
"Are you crazy, Cat? I know Kung Fu!"

Submitted March 1, 2021
for L Milton Hankins' Limericks In Honor Of St. Patrick's Day Poetry Contest...

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I want to pick a fight
Readied my arsenal to fight
Finished the last Kung Fu drill
I'm in the mood to fight
No one is annoying me today
My toes are peeping 
Nobody is stepping, today
Lend me your enemy, today
Finished my Kung Fu class
I'm looking for experience
They fear me, today...

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I wish that I was a Kangaroo 
         That had several belts in kung fu 
               With fast hands and feet
                   Hard for most to beat
     And I wouldn't have to wait for the loo 

   


5- 5 -18

Inspired by the " I Wish I Was A" Contest
Sponsor: Viv Wigley...

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At work a (millennial) was snorting 
about his weekend trip to a casino
how he was sick of wearing a mask
how he didn't care if he died or not.
I asked him what if he were to tote  
the bat flu home to his loved ones
he gave me the F.U. (boomer) stare
walking away in smart phone glare....

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Deloris Dishpa A Girl who likes Swans--


There once was a girl who liked swans.
She said, "See the lovely vons!"
It was rather young,
But not quite egg fu yung
She couldn't say no to the salons.

3/7/19
Written words by James Edward Lee Sr.  2019©
A Limerick by James Edward Lee Sr....

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