Funny Retirement Poems

Brave Hanks, 'midst the Normandy storm,
Led his men, keeping them warm.
He'd yell, "Find that Ryan!"
While inwardly sighin',
"My pension? Is that the new form?"

©bfa032025
(Tom Hanks in...

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I'm retired and live in a small, mobile home,
about 5600 miles from the outskirts of Rome,
about 7200 miles from the waters of the Ganges,
and about...

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I REMEMBER MY CREATOR 
A GREAT BIG BURLY LAD
I WAS SENT OFF TO THE HARDWARE STORE
TO DO THE SAME JOB AS MY DAD.
A YOUNG CHAP...

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My heart and mind don't align
I yearn for dreams to yield but vegetate
Putting off things for the very next day
My willpower is always at its...

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Taking my old Town-Car out for a little spin,
never suffer through rush hour traffic again.
Now we have time to see all those places we’ve never...

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Pulling covers off my back
                  Lying in this...

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retirement close, Arthur sadly wonders, 
                    ...

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dog catcher ferguson jeeves

found a new job raking leaves

since he turned eighty one

neighbors now have more fun

he's no longer spreading fleas.
...

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He once thanked Jesus for his fame when he was interviewed with his best friend Keanue Reeves.
In the end, i think, that's what finally clocked...

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On retirement all The Due proceed,
Because cars don’t their speed exceed;
In their pet jobs hope to succeed,
Sometimes sensible warnings don’t heed.
A solution to the riddles...

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fridays were exciting
~
breaking
workweek from weekend
~
however
now retired
don't miss adventure
mostly crave quietude



posted on May 29, 2020...

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It’s a milestone at least, chalk it up as a feat,
That your younger self never thought you could meet.
But how does it feel, this crossroads...

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So this is what it feels like
     I say to myself
Isn’t it funny how you wait
And think and plan for something
Something...

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They said I was an “old fart”
But I hardly think that’s true
My boobs were done in ‘75
But my teeth and knees are new.

And since my...

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Old Rudolph sired a reindeer last June
In hopes Santa would retire him soon
But the young one's red nose winks
Like a brothel's red light blinks
So they...

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