Long Prius Poems

Let me tell you a story, a story of woe:
a tale of a pup who got lost in the snow.
Daughter Laura, our eldest, came up to see us,
drove home in a Jeep (to rhyme, insert...

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Deft "star student" and beloved dynamic daughter upon her twenty fourth birthday

I suppose... see:)?

twas approximately early/mid March
nineteen ninety six begat your fate
obstetrics and gynecology specialist(s)
signalled impending birth (due) date

about nine months later
December twenty second, and...

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If these racists be so plentiful
As them in power would believe.
There should be at least one found
Lurking... about my property.
 
How to catch this dreaded beastie
Was overarching on my mind?
So I laid waste my poor...

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Interruptions

She calls each day at noon, after her 
maple bar and coffee.  
Her only meal for the day.  Whiskey’s 
dinner.
I try to pick up.  Answering machines 
seem to frustrate her.

I want to...

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Stand under the proscenium arch
Listen to show tunes till doomsday comes
Dawn with the songs of ever lasting darkness

Tap dance your last dance on Broadway 
Burn the last lime light down
Take midnight with you
Pay no tolls...

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The Day I Saw Batman

By Elton Camp

When I was walking along in Gotham City
The sight I saw seemed to be such a pity

There stood Batman checking his cell phone
With no Robin about, he was quite...

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Bumble bees
Come inside
And do not demise
But transform to our surprise
It’s all in the knack of
Nothing rather go on willing
But there they stood
Before us two huge
Humans with black and yellow
Markings on his mostly black armor
He spoke...

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You see them all the time,
the Stepford wife 
and her counterpart,
the bronzed over, buffed high sheen,
man bun walking in skinny jeans,
so tight they squeak...
HIPSTER as they pass on by. 

With a flower in the beard,...

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Phooey to Tree Huggers

By Elton Camp

Folks tell me how they like my new Bentley
It gets eleven miles per gallon, incidentally 

Such a low rating is absolutely fine with me
Because I am a filthy rich so-and-so,...

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A Car Too Small

By Elton Camp

These high gas prices nearly all resent
From reasonable to scandalous it went
It’s a situation that I truly abhor
I can’t drive a Town Car anymore

To take a vacation in our SUV
Is...

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Women Being Slighted Again

Men can be controllers of women's lives
And must give approval to their wives
For things to do that they may want
Down horrible husbands have to hunt.
(Trump's favorite simple-minded word.)

Statement has been made by...

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I dreamt I owned a 1939 Buick.
Later, I realized I did not,
but wondered:
could tommy-gun wielding
gangsters still be historically relevant
without running-boards?

A very cool car,
just ask Humphrey Bogart;
he had a 38 special
and knew how to use it.

I...

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There once was a gal from motor city
who drove a Prius to give her celebrity.
Her guy drove a Ford
and cursed her “Oh, Lord!”
Their divorce was a forgone necessity!

Their children, a boy and a girl, 
took...

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The body is a biological car,
maybe you inherited
a Rolls Royce, a Lamborghini,
a Maserati, most probably you got a Prius
or a work-truck.
Sooner or later,
whether a Bentley or a model T Ford
all vehicles end up the same.
In...

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