Long Parr Poems

The Call

For as long as I can remember, I have been phoning my mom. Even before leaving home when I was a teenager. Whenever I had good or bad news, it was just natural for...

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King Henry VIII and His Wives 

By Elton Camp

When Henry’s brother was too young to care
He was made to wed a princess from over there
But you must do just what we say little fella,
Catherine's the...

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A Magic Adventure of Peter The Pan/AKA Peta The Fwying Pan

Peter was a fine young pan with blue eyes
Like all the other pans his age, except,
Peter could not yet pronounce 'R's'--he tried...
And 'L's'...so hard he...

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AN  INFAMOUS LEGEND

King Henry XIII was indeed quite a boy,
He had no clue how to spell the word coy,
He was consumed by a quest that 
A wife bear,
And give birth to a male heir,
He...

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As throwaway as this comment
may seem to anyone but i

And bearing in mind my limited
experience and knowledge
thus far in life

I still can say and make this
statement without a shodow
of doubt

That the most smartest , wise
and...

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Henry VIII
Henry VIII king of England, he had six wives,
Half of which had rather shorter lives.
Three died, two divorced and the last was glad by far,
For she outlived him, her name Catherine Parr.

Mash
I love mash,
I...

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King 'Enry of The 'Ouse of Tudor ruled merrie olde England, the mighty and the meek.
'E was quite obese in 'is elder years and threw 'is weight around - so to speak!
'E governed from 1509...

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Maidens, bloody maidens, I had me six of ‘em wenches, ye knowest
Fullsome Catherine of Aragon wrought havoc ‘tween me and the Pope
Besought a divorce, split from the church whilst Anne Boleyn caught mine eye
'Twas beheaded...

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Woke up on the wrong side of the bed.
There's a mind numbing pain at work in my head.

Wash my hair and comb my face,
Something died in my mouth, where's the toothpaste.

Grab a quick bit of...

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On the edge of gartan lake a forest path once lead, to a clearing down amongst the trees with only stars up over head.

There I slept and fished by night, 
The little fly cast in...

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Six wives - three Catherines, two Annes and a Jane
were married to Henry in the course of his reign.
An Anne and a Catherine met their end by the axe.
Anne Boleyn was too haughty, Catherine Howard...

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Seems King 'Enry The Eighth in 'is choice of wives wasn't all that judicious.
To 'Is Grace's regret they were either too ambitious, promiscuous or capricious!

'E solved such prickly matters for five of them by divorce...

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salmon leap... for life
shallow streams bid them welcome
otters... all well fed

elvers... millions
passing salmon parr... seabound
smoked eel... delicious

tench... the doctor fish
sought by the diseased... ailing
the river flows on

the great white shark swims
an ever hungry beauty
makes good...

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It seem's to me
That not even poetry
Nor truth or reality

Can redefine
The border lines

That the modern day Hollywood Blockbuster 
Have already surpassed and eclipsed
With comically bad Sub - Parr scripts

And even though incoherently funny
They will rake...

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