Long Loonies Poems

Up here in Canada we have our own words
Everywhere does, some think ours are absurd
Between toques, hosers and rhyming currency
Like loonies and toonies, we do speak uniquely
But narrow it down to one province specific
Our Saskatchewan...

Read More

Well, I moved into town to live like a city slicker,
Loaded my truck, found a place, and here I am,
Though a country boy has a head a bit thicker,
City life is not so hard to...

Read More

Well, The National Loonies League is on the prowl again this year,
Merrily chipping away at the Christmas traditions we hold dear.
Seems to me they could find something more productive to pursue,
And let others celebrate Christmastide...

Read More

Michiganderer Philandered and Rachel Maddow

She is most modest and not a mad cow
Which is why we love Rachel Maddow
Now or brown or full blown all over town
She is none other than Maddow world renown. 

Definitely...

Read More

I've recorded the song, which you can hear here:

I did vocals and guitar - Sung to the tune of "We Can Work it Out" 


What a TV Show

American Idol
There’s so many loonies seeking fortune 
and...

Read More

What Shall We Do?

Shall we start with wine and women eating cheese?
Are there grapes in the forest?  Will our children use there knees?

Shall we fall from clouds and eat from a pan?
Are there apples...

Read More

Will there ever be total peace in the world

Or am I just a silly old goon

As long as loonies want more than their share

Even want a piece of the moon

Good people of earth will forever...

Read More

Need a cuddle, are you available? 
I promise not to linger too long
Maybe seven, maybe eight hours or so
Maybe until the break of dawn

Just enough time to satisfy my craving
That haunts me day and night
Gonna...

Read More

Need a cuddle, are you available? 
I promise not to linger too long
Maybe seven, maybe eight hours or so
Maybe until the break of dawn

Just enough time to satisfy my craving
That haunts me day and night
Gonna...

Read More

Need a cuddle, are you available? 
I promise not to linger too long
Maybe seven, maybe eight days or so
Maybe until the break of dawn

Just enough time to satisfy my craving
That haunts me day and night
Gonna...

Read More

Need a cuddle, are you available? 
I promise not to linger too long
Maybe seven, maybe eight hours straight
Maybe till the break of dawn

Just enough time to satisfy my craving
That haunts me day and night
Gonna wind...

Read More

On a night sable, my door hastily thrown 
abducted in a rush by one-eyed loonies,
neon- yellow skin reflecting oval heads
whisking me in a shuttle, circling far away.
Taken to a realm where their master reigned,
impish a...

Read More

Thinking all of this time
that I stood next to giants
'til I realized those giants were mad

But what brought me here
was impulsive stupidity
I see now that I have been had

Why seek fame and glory
when those who...

Read More

Chuckles, giggles and guffaws
That's the only way to fly
Find silliness in all everyday things
Tears of joy will fill your eyes

In fact if you're not careful
You'll infect your fellow man
Before you can say "pink panties"
Loonies will...

Read More

VALENTINE LIGHT
Your absence through the sky, in making night,
except at lunar rise, where you reflect;
and tiny twinklings nearly out of sight;
we wish upon, for things we don't expect.

No one has wings to fly, as angels...

Read More

Evilness has not reared his head in my world.
I know nothing of it, really, and do not pretend to.
The devilish ways of mischievous mites and sprites
Makes me happy. I love their keen confidence.

Give me an...

Read More

There's an H-Bomb on our doorstep
That's threatening to kill us all
There's a F-Bomb on my tender lips
And I'm bouncing off the wall

My middle digit is raised on high
In a glorious finger salute
Dropping my drawers in...

Read More

as not you with yarmulke
delivering yogurts past the age of curdle
what you asked from me a cuddle

as in a tent you phantom 
I'll be drooling for thank you
your mistake

as many tests show will be a...

Read More

Monstrous Loonies in the air;
Monstrous Loonies everywhere,
Monstrous Loonies without a care;
That's our politicians!

Monstrous Loonies worldwide,
Monstrous Loonies, nowhere to hide!
Monstrous Loonies, let's stem the tide;
Of useless politicians.

Monstrous Loonies, a set of dopes,
Monstrous Loonies, how can we...

Read More

one evening in the desert the moon began to glow
far off in the western sky the sun was sinking low
i looked out on the mesa and lo what did i see
lights of blue and yellow...

Read More

when i die send me 2 Thunder Bay
thundered thunder bolts r 10 dbs
Nipigon River Bridge Recharging Station currents
regenerate thunder like brook trout roe
restocking fishing rods 2 ur net, 
brook trout wear speckles not glasses,
revolted thunder...

Read More

Donkey’s ogling artful masks
like drunks ogling addictive flasks – 
You sure look fancy—Nancy! 

Be submissive! Behaving neurotic
is now patriotic – loonies in charge 
of the asylum; 

        ...

Read More

Steeplejacks are nutso!
What more is there to say
I guess the lure of big money
Would certainly come into play

But not for a million trillion
Normally not afraid of heights
But these guys are totally bonkers
Watching them's a scary...

Read More