Long Kaye Poems
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Defecation clogged toilet bowl courtesy metamucil..
and found (me) zee papa pooped out
**** eyes zing thee
nightly dump for yesterday
July 8th, 2020 - whereby
plunger helped obstruction give way
I nearly lost me life and limb oy vey
oh my dog, the same asinine outcome
which spurred poet to get underway
matter of fact, a replay
of excretion almost occurred today
and thus an attempt to describe
a tragicomic scenario
regarding bowel movement size of subway
overflowing potty nearly
found yours truly quay
king, yet impossible mission
arises to portray
unsightly situation, the
juvenile elements of style
I hate to overplay
odoriferous subject matter
nsync with constipation
since laxative delineates,
expedites, facilitates,... née
posits heavy load emanating out rectum
quite amazing what smelly waste
exits out me
necessitating captain my captain
to signal mayday
posterior end, a dime size orifice,
which malfunctioning sphincter muscles
one moost never be lackaday
'though kids and adults
laughed back in the day,
if and/or when Danny Kaye
tactfully poked fun
at such critical bodily phenomenon
equally important as a jackstay
to keep afloat body electric
'curse with auxiliary
linkedin kickstarting jazzmatazz interplay
analogously precise as
Swiss made timepiece
said system responsible
to expel bodily toxins
upon which sitting on porcelain throne
one can softly utter hooray
thankful to experience relative pleasure
until one becomes feeble minded,
whereat fifty plus shades of gray
matter allows, enables, and
provides enjoyably foray
into the bathroom, which entranceway
hoop fully not barred nor off limits
cuz that primitive urge one best not delay
lest one requires lower
gastrointestinal intervention
especially if blocked up
fecal matter turns to clay
unless of course one doth
cause damage and betray
respect toward well
oiled human machine
exercising and eating healthy
avoiding backside skeleton musculature issues
yes... I reckon during twilight years
control over bowels doth slip away.
Too Much TV
David J Walker
I imagined
a grand theme song
And the applause
of a capitative audience
A clever line or two and then
The laugh track
Of an amused
though admittedly
phantom audience
I was as quick as
Dick VanDyke
And as light
on my feet
as Danny Kaye
as heroic
and stoic
as Matt Dillon in
Dodge City
And as good looking as
Ricky Ricardo
I knew every answer
Before it was asked
On What’s My Line
And fooled every panel on
To tell the truth
Every time
And it would not be long
Before my made-up song
Would debut on
The Ed Sullivan Show
TURN OFF THE TV
AND FINISH YOUR HOMEWORK
Hollard Mom a thousand times
And she would holler it
a thousand more
before
I was out the door
And on my way to
A career
In TV
news
No laugh track
No applause
Just the blues
Of another day
On your 10 O’clock news
So, yes
I grew up watching
Too much TV
Didn’t you?
The radio was playing “Have Yourself
a Merry Little Christmas.” Widow Kaye
was putting reindeer figures on her shelf.
She glanced outside where snow like frosting lay
along her fence. “Yes, let my heart be light,”
she muttered as the melody played on.
She frowned. Although her tree looked nice and bright,
it had no shining star. Where had it gone?
It vanished like those “faithful friends so dear.”
She sighed, “What am I doing all this for?
The kids aren’t even coming.” Then a tear
slid down her cheek. “Yes, ‘golden days of yore’
since not one soul this year can visit me!”
she voiced. “Oh well, I sure do love this tree.”
Written December 2015
For the Christmas Carol Poetry Contest of Kelly Deschler
"Black and white in want of each other, and not in need, inevitably;
of my following sampling's POV," ... by the Poet.
Pandas are loners, though my statement is a misconception of the simple fact of reproduction and raising. Two credible factors bear on Pandas in the wild, but once they've matured on both points, they part company to be alone.
Between Ludwig van Beethoven and Danny Kaye, tickling those Ivories is a statement for only Kaye since Ivory wasn't a commodity to Pianos over a century old. Striking those 88s does apply, most admirably, for both Piano players.
Dalmatians, a hallmark of fire stations, though by law no animals are allowed, except registered seeing-eye dogs or rescue squads are at the station with qualified animals, or when FEMAs there and their entitled animals.
Possible fun things to see: an Orca reading a Newspaper held up on an aquarium glass; a Penguin nudge a Domino toppling more; a Skunk riding a Zebra-back; in The UK, a Scots girl holding a Soccer Ball under her arm wearing a Pirate's eye patch Skull and Crossbones gazes with her other eye at the inviting Night Sky Stars and Moon while eating an Oreo Cookie, now looks both ways before walking on the Pedestrian Crossing a street as men play Dice on a sidewalk outside a pub in dark Manchester.
*B&Ws in capital letters
Hard to fathom what makes us tick
We're all unique as they say
One person loves rock and roll music
Another loves Sammy Kaye
Was always a true Glenn Miller fan
And big bands of the 40s and 50s
Vocalists like Sinatra and Como
And Frankie Laine was also nifty
Boy! Am I living back in the past
With crinolines and saddle shoes
Terribly miss the much simpler times
Suffering from a case of the blues
Guess each generation misses their past
When things were a lot more fun
This roller coaster ride can get us down
Just enjoy your day in the sun
Must be realistic and accept the future
With all of it's scary unknowns
If you approach it with a great big smile
You'll wonder where the years have flown
© Jack Ellison 2013
Hard to fathom what makes us tick
We're all unique as they say
One person loves rock and roll music
Another loves Sammy Kaye
Was always a true Glenn Miller fan
And big bands of the 40s and 50s
Vocalists like Sinatra and Como
And Frankie Laine was also nifty
WOW! Am I living in the past or what
With crinolines and saddle shoes
Terribly miss these much simpler times
Suffering from a case of the blues
Guess each generation misses their past
When things were a lot more fun
This roller coaster ride can get us down
Just enjoy your day in the sun
Must be realistic and accept the future
With all of it's scary unknowns
If you approach it with a great big smile
You'll wonder where the years have flown
© Jack Ellison 2015
Fanm, fanm, o fanm rapadou
Boubout mwen, bèsom, kòmansmanm
Nan kaye jounalye mwen chak jou
Chak jou se pou ou, se jou pa ou
Ou se nanm mwen, poto pitanmm
Mwen renmen ou chak jou
Chouchoum, mwen renmen ou.
Bèl fanm, bèl cheri, bèl bote
Ou nan kèm tout la jounen
Ou okipe nan nan lavi mwen
Ou se Princess mwen, gran Majeste
Ou se larenn mwen, yon gran sous
Fanm, fanm, o fanm dous
Oksijèn mwen, bèl dam mwen.
Fanm, fanm, kinanm mwen
Etwal nan syèl, lalin lavi mwen
Ou se yon poupe orijinal, bèl fanm
Ou se moun ki konn naje, e rame nan lanm
Ou se yon fanm ki byen akonpli nan la Bib
Fanm, fanm, o fanm sansib
Ou se solèy kap klere palmis mwen an.
Wi ou se yon fanm natal fondamantal
Anj gadyen mwen, sent vyèj mwen, ala ou bèl
Lavi pagen oken sans san ou, chouchou
Ou se trezòm, fanm, fanm, espwa mwen
Ou se kèm, rèv mwen, nanm mwen
Fanm, fanm misterye, mwen damou ou.
P.S. Tradiksyon "Joyous Women’s Day"
Ki ekri Pa Hébert Logerie
Copyright © Mas 2019, Hébert Logerie, Tout dwa rezève
Hébert Logerie se otè plizyè liv pwezi.
So this is Fremont, California
Circa nineteen sixty-nine,
Nice and bit of a tight-knit
Neighborhood, that is fine.
I am a honey tanned Hawaiian
In a nearly all white community,
With the only swimming pool
Thinks there is another opportunity.
Learned later that ours was it
For this part of the town,
And that would be none for the
Bunch of kids that I hang around.
Being the only kid of a different color
Other than those in this new school,
Though that did not bother me so
Except for a gang whose leader is a fool.
My dad is a Golden Glove winner back in Hawaii
Where he had taught me the ropes,
Having the ability gave me the ardor to be cool
And bypass the taunts and tease by some folks.
Until one day, the leader of the bullies
Stood in my way and was not letting me pass,
He pushed me back so I would fall, instead
With my fist, lands an uppercut to a chin of glass.
The rest stood back, all were aghast,
Their leader held his bleeding lip
And all his teeth were colored red
So, I raised my hand and gave them a finger flip.
With the friends that I had made
Together to the back fence of my house
Dropped our things over, then with our hands
Gripped the upper part like Mighty Mouse.
Ten legs dangled on the other side
Released, falling onto the bench pool
Then stripped down to our BVDs
All five of us jumped into the waiting pool.
None could pronounce my last name, 'Kekaula'
Proper pronunciation is, Kaye-COW-la
Unbeknownst to my mom of my nickname
That my friends called me, 'Coca-Cola'.
So that was the young life that I have stored
In my treasured overflowing chest of memories
Indelible encryptions freely shared by me
Nowadays a smile known only to be my reveries.
Date: 06/08/2019