Long Have a cow Poems

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Premium Member The Impersonator

"The Impersonator"
Discovered on karaoke night 
A few friends gave him a dare
To imitate the star he thought most of 
For a hundred bucks if he cared

He got up on stage and sang with a whimper
It was his first time under pressure
To the boos and the heckles
This was not in good measure

With nothing to lose he got rid of his fright
Before he said a good night to all
He picked up the pace, to Usher he would sing 
That is if he had the gall

Getting better he was with the rhythm 
Showing people what he hadn't given them yet
A well oiled machine oh yes
He was determined to win that bet

Dancing around with dynamic class
There was no stopping him now
His associates took big drinks of the liquor
Losing all that money they were going to have a cow
 His voice box was a storage crate 
Filled with tons of jovial surprise
'Give me that money' he said
That they did with new found awe in their eyes

He was good they retorted
You should go on tour
Unless you have other talents better than this
Say a desk job somewhere, but god what a bore

He went around impressing people 
The man and the image were becoming closer
For the joy how it started
It was actually hard work to be good and not a joker

There were no problems being an entertainer
Some time went by with growing popularity
Admiration built on another person's fame
There was no problem leaching serendipity

Then one day he grew so big 
And the man himself showed up
He was about to knock him in the face 
But saw he was still just a pup

A youngster with nothing else to do 
This moment built up consternation
Stealing efforts off the artist's image
He hoped that it started out as admiration

It did though, so he punched him not
In fact he started blushing, for imitation is flattery
A major reason he picked the man in the first place
The issue resolved itself without assault or battery 

They decided to go on tour together
The differences would be minor
Covering his sick days and vacations many a time
The copy cat would not live finer

For a long time they lasted taking over for each other
The secret would go with them forever
To give them a bond of deception on the audience
Their ties no one could sever
Form: Rhyme


Premium Member Connie Meets Dough Boy At Dawn

connie meets dough boy at dawn

so connie went to the bakery at dawn
bright eyed and bushy
out of a story book pops her dough boy
so plump, especially in the rump
so hairy, especially in the brow
so cute, especially in the eyes
connie's in love
this time it's for real
bells in her cache are ringing
dolphins are singing in her well
swans are dancing in her strawberry patch
connie's beside herself
soon dough boy, too
come on god let this be the one
come on angles start rooting for me for once
dough boy comes on over to her, great
now keep in mind there about the same age, perfect
even though he has gomer in him...
ma'am would you like a sample
connie blushes five shades of red
so much for the poker face
dough boy ringing her bell, blowing her whistle
connie can see dough boy in her oven ... making some lov'en
samplin his buffet spread, too
then the balloon pops
see another tease .. another baker icing her heart
 dough boy turns her pages back,    i knew it
ma'am I have apple fritter squares that you can sample
connie rolls her eyes
connie chokes on his words
connie ready to have a cow
connie leaves broken hearted
gees, mightest well put the whips and clips back on ice
...forever, connie will never find her man
why couldn't it have been (insert heart, cupid arrow, two love birds)
His smiles glisten like a river of waves 
Beckoning her to ride the rapids with him
Together they rode the white sheet of trim
riding it's banks to a whitewash of splash 
no. no.no
of course not
thank you my angels
ma'am you want an apple fritter
great

connie pachecho

1/14/17

Premium Member Dawn's Over-Usage

dawn's over-usage 

Again, again I hear another use of the word dawn in a poem,
in a phrase, in a conversation ... in my headache
... another sweet dawn, another morning dawn,
... another break of dawn, dawn's eyes peaking, another dawning
dawn, dawn, dawn
that sneak
why, why, why
please, 
I want to vomit with her overuse, already
her smug little face i see every daybreak
every morning
please, 
no i'm not jeolous 
such rotten eggs to my eyes and ears
dawn, dawn, dawn
can life shed some good light
put it this way
Connie's going to have a cow soon
it won't be pretty
listen connie
helps on the way
Connie we hear you, we do
trust us
help is on the way we repeat
we're sending your physch doctors right away
okay, 
then again maybe we're not
okay, rats
it's just that everyone's in love with dawn, doc
why the infatuation
like i woke up to a new dawn, please
people writing, like she's an animate object
people speaking like she'd a god, doc
that she ... oh, oh, will spring to life and open her arms
like an angel, or celestial being
please 
she's not, doc
she nothing special
she not the easter bunny, 
she's an overused phrase, doc
point being how how often do you read
about eve standing center stage
getting fawned ,exposed 
not as much as dawn, doc
that ...
where did you go doc,
doc, help ... what was that about blasphemy 
where did you go doc,
yet. yet just look what I read
Saturday's Wall Street Journal
head lines
vomit time
Trump Starts A New Dawn
Please, you
please, find an answer to this riddle

connie pachecho

1/24/17

Premium Member Dadgum It Boy

grandpa use to sit in his rockin chair
I'd climb in his lap
both started to nod off
so we took a nap
he'd let me play in his bread
offend time he'll wake up
snorting, coughing, and showing
spitting hailing hands waving
jumping up out of his seat
screaming hollering what's this

He'd jump up
and he would say yell
Dadgum it boy
whaz ya dun did now
My grandpa seemingly
would have a cow
He'd said
Dadgum it boy
Later on that day I seen him out in the yard
With a shovel in his hands
Appears he was diggin a hole
I had laid my rake down
And as grandpa turned around
He took a few steps
And stepped on the head of that rake
as that pole of the rake hit him in the face... he said
 he would say yell
Dadgum it boy
whaz ya dun did now
My grandpa seemingly
would have a cow
He'd said
Dadgum it boy
ya, can't do nothin right
git right over there and sit down, don't move a muscle
Dadgum it

10/11/18
Written words  by James Edward Lee Sr.©2018

                                                    10th ANNUAL 

                                     INTERGENERATIONAL POETRY CONTEST
                                           University of Nebraska Omaha
                     COLLEGE OF PUBLIC AFFAIRS AND COMMUNITY SERVICE 
                                         DEPARTMENT OF GERONTOLOGY
                      Poetry to Bridge Generations. Poetry is the voice of the soul
                         How the world views or how society treats older people.  
                                                     Submission by

The Answer To the Quiz Poem

Guess some are wondering what the answer is,
To that little poem of a quiz.
Since we all don’t know Liz,
And even I don’t know who she is, 
Then the answer to be, so simple you see 
Is at the end of this quiz, so hurry, hurry.
How can I tell you in such a way, 
that you can enjoy what I say.
Well Al my Pal wanted something funny,
So tried my best without spending money.
But money brings up a hint to the answer,
don’t get excited it’s not a banker.
Now let me see, where to go from here,
Think there’s a grin from ear to ear,
Is that you Al with that big ole smile?
Well glad there’s laughter for a while.
Back to where we’re suppose to be,
Thinking of the answer don’t you see.
We now have one clue more then we had,
And that ain’t too bad.
Lets gather together all we got’s,
Am so happy no one’s distraught.
There’s something about the color green, 
Maybe something we wear in spring.
The four leaf clover might have been a guess,
But not the answer to this test
But relates to what we are thinking of,
Here comes the answer from above.
Dover oh Dover, many miles away, 
Knows the answer, but will not say.
Has anyone thought of a pot of gold?
This relates I am told.
If you haven’t guessed by now,
Then here’s the answer, don’t have a cow.
Chaun is the last part of it his name.
Look real close to find a Lep,
Then all that is left is a Re.
Putting them together gives the answer to be.
They are scrambled a bit,
But don’t have a fit.
Think of the pot of gold, where he sits 
We’ll just call him Leprechaun.
Form:


Premium Member Surfing Waves of Excrement

Most surfers love Nature, don’t seem a nefarious lot,
Ride their waves just for fun, don’t use drugs on the main,
Don't incite poor to riot, dismiss Camelot,
Don't yell fire in close spaces for personal gain.

Many surfers still strive to be their brother's keeper,
While others view life as a zero-sum game,
Surreptitiously acting like Al-Qaeda sleeper,
Serve terrorist goals but in Patriot's name.

An actual Patriot mans ship of state with his heart,
And rejects the idea we’re all lost at sea
He knows making ship smaller just drives men apart,
Only fools are sectarian, “You can’t be me!”

It’s pure excrement really men stand on their own legs,
Republican pride adds scant flavor to turds,
They are liars and hypocrites, (walking on bad eggs?),
“Free will” means betray those who trust in your words.

They lay it on thick but can’t love anyone but themselves,
No assistance to those who have nothing to lose,
Let them look under toad stools and find their own elves!
Why give squat to your country (if you have the blues)?

The Republicans love their despicable role play,
And double speak always is good for a laugh,
With George Orwell as mentor, and Russians for foreplay,
A Putin suggestion, “Go on, have a calf!” (1)

Brian Johnston
July 28, 2017

Poet’s Notes:
(1) “Don’t have a cow!” –  “Don’t get angry” transmogrifies into “Go on, have a calf!” - “You think I care if you are angry? Ha!” OK, I took some liberties
Form: Quatrain

Premium Member The City Zoo

A cute gentile pig in New York
plays hopscotch over turtle hurdles
which eased her bunny
until a smack talking turkey announced,
'Did you hear how the skunks in bombay
lost a spelling bee - to an
artistic aardvark named clark?'

Around her, muttering mosquitoes
Dear teddy bear, my teddy bear
While a mynah bird confesses
to freeing an elephant

Who stands where dragons roam
dreaming of dinosaurs, as
King Doberman eavesdrops on
Seagulls talking to a sock monkey

Don't have a cow
The little red squirrel told my lioness-
Koalas love a cooling tang. 

7/21/19

For 20 Titles from 20 Friends contest
Sponsor: Richard Lamoureux

A cute gentile pig in New York - Gershon Wolf
Turtle Hurdles - Mark Toney
Eased Her Bunny - Rico Leffanta
Smack Talking Turkey - Freddie Robinson Jr
Skunks in Bombay - Pat Adams
Spelling Bee - Line Gauthier
Artistic Aardvark named Clark - Caren Krutsinger
Muttering mosquitoes - sand blown
Dear teddy bear, my teddy bear - Connie Marcum Wong
A Mynah Bird Confesses - Kim Rodrigues
Freeing an Elephant - Suzanne Delany
Where Dragons Roam - P.S. Awtry
Dreaming of Dinosaurs - Jan Allison
King Doberman - Tania Kitchin
Seagulls Talking - Rhona Mcferran
Sock Monkey - Nina Parmenter
Don't Have a Cow - Alexis Y
The Little Red Squirrel - Pixie Dust
My Lioness - Anisha Dutta
Koalas Love a Cooling Tang - M.L. Kiser

Premium Member Journey to the Right Brain

Our brains, the experts do opine,
Have a left side, a right side, and a dividing line –
But that daunting corpus callosum
I fear to cross it - there to, here from.

I started out upon a path 
Of dedication to studying math,
A fascinating field for sure,
Its revelations beautiful and pure.

But then, you will be sad to hear
Of my unfortunate IT career.
I’ve done my time, and now I’m free,
As I can now exclaim with glee.

So how am I to spend my time?
Is there a mountain yet to climb?
I still like math’s secrets, so sublime.
Perhaps, I’ll discover a new kind of prime!

But I can hear another voice
That says I have another choice.
What is the source of this refrain?
I think it’s the right side of my brain.

Dare I cross that mountain range
To my right brain so new and strange?
There may be wonders to behold
Or even splendors of pure gold.

But, what if I should make a chunk 
Of something similar to junk,
The sound of which it makes is clunk,
The smell of which resembles skunk?

A mistake in math, like eleventy-six,
An eraser and some graphite fix - 
But for a right-brain belly-flop,
It’s me to which, I must apply a mop.

But I resolve, right here and now,
Flops won’t make me have a cow.
When everything is said and done,
The important thing is having fun.
Form: Couplet

How

3/3/15



Remember we take responsibility on our own account
As of now
How?
Could you have any idea what I'm about
If you just listen to what came out of another person's mouth
Especially if it was negative and rather foul
Then don't you dare have a cow
Before giving me a chance to disprove the doubts
Not that I'm worried about having to verify or vouch
And with that I'm out


Stomach continuing to growl
Time to get some chow
Preferrably kung pao

Cruising around the town
To familiar and unfamiliar grounds


Enjoying the moment atop the mountains and the profound
Amount of clouds

Aiming to rise higher with less fluctuation than the renowned DOW
And if not, I'd still be proud
For trying instead of giving up and holding my head down

It's not allowed
Don't cross the line or move out of bounds


Like a wolf, I like to stare up at the moon and howl
Before continuing on the prowl
With senses and vision sharper than an owl
Never blowing my cover or making a sound

Sometimes I burn up so much loud
All by myself or with a crowd

By: Dalton Ogletree
Form: Rhyme

Premium Member I Messed With Daylight Saving's Time

I Messed with Daylight Saving's Time
By Franklin Price
11/1//2015

I messed with daylight saving's time
Right after Trick or Treat
When the clocks were showing 9:00 PM
Made change to sleeplessness defeat

Stopped the old grandfather clock
To let the hour pass the day
Took the analogs and turned them back
In the Fall that is the way

Changed the hours on the digitals
The PM's  to indicate
Microwave and stove the easiest
The numbered keys are really great

Swung the pendulum on old grandpa
When the hour passed was done
Was the last change in the house
An hour gained for sleep what fun

Cheated by five hours
The 2:00 AM directive change
I knew I would be sleeping then
Was not about to rearrange

I thought I was all finished
Now awakened by the sun
I see the cars with clocks in them
There is not only one

Each has its way of setting
The manuals could tell me how
But I'm a man can't look at them
Rather curse and have a cow

But you know today is Sunday
It's the day we praise the Lord
Guess I'll change the clocks by manual
On the Honda and the Ford
Form: Rhyme

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