Long Goop Poems

Scrounging for boogers wrought my damn nostrils nearly to bust 

Warning: The following material no worse than getting cooties. I remember them way back in grade school, whereat everyone ran away from me with worse...

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They’d crossed the great divide, to the other side of the ‘Oh My God River’.
Our Trolls were struck by the ‘Bridge Too Far’, it set their hearts, to quiver.
Yes, their curiosity and their great big...

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Scrounging for boogers wrought my damn nostrils nearly to bust 

My humblest apology if the following account
doth gross thee out forlorn childhood of mine 
found further ostracization of me tantamount
being shipped off to  a...

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Being sick with a snotty nose
A cough, fatigue, one of those colds???
For goodness sake's everyone knows
Grandmothers are too sophicated 
To wear anything but fancy clothes
Surely not a Kleenex box attached
To their chair, and looking unkempt
And...

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EGBERT THE ADORABLE OCTOPUS & OTHER NONSENSE VERSE

Egbert the Octopus
is so damn cute
& smarter than u
(the point is moot) 
'cause he doesn't pollute
when he commutes, 
only, perhaps, 
when he (ahem)  "poots"! 
—michael r. burch



Monarch
by...

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While rifling through outdated poems of mine
some written quite a number of years ago,
the following mewing effort, I decided to post
for all purring cyber surfers linkedin 
to the webbed, wide world to read.

Prince Of A...

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As I wake up each morning I look to the sky, I look all around me, I wonder how, I wonder why? Why is the sky so blue, why is the grass so green? With...

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A farmer's son was once tending to his mother's hens,
Collecting their eggs to sell,
At his family's road-side market stand when,
He found a purple egg with a rotten smell. 

The boy looked around at all the...

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Preface to this brief bitty
written snap ting snapshot – word ditty
dates back before I reached gritty
age of eight and fifty, aye recall a kitty
rescued by my youngest sister, who took pity
and felt aghast, 
at a...

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Whether the weather 
necessitates to anchor 
     myself as a tether
when the frankenstorm 
     socks the east coast 
     shredding terrestrial 
 ...

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(French terms to know: arabesque (ar-a-besk) stand on one leg, other leg extended back
with knee straight, arms out; pirouette (peer-oo-et) a full turn of the body on the top of
the toe or the ball of...

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The industrial hull of the SUV 
Sways with the slightest wind taps 
And pothole shoves. Popeye’s signs, 
Golden shell displays, the lingering smell 
Of Premium-grade gasoline. 
The prices are Down, but our gas meter still...

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If they make you transform into a puddle of goop at their feet, then you know you’re in trouble and you should run before it gets too deep
If they convey that the words in the...

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Animal Poems 3

These poems about animals include man's best friend, dogs, as well as cats, hamsters, whales, sea lions, caterpillars, butterflies, and even snails! 



Hell-Bound Hounds
by Michael R. Burch

We have five dogs and every one’s...

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He loomed large, his white t-shirt bulging, 
his apron hanging off an impressive gut.  
“Keep stirring,” he said, 
slapping me on my back as he wandered off.  
Over his shoulder, “Just keep stirring.”...

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*UPCOMING E-BOOKz BOOKz RELEASE*

The Journals of the 87th Street Precinct is an  eyewitness account of the evolution of a revolution in America!\

Except: Pigs and Panthers
         ...

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Dad’s oldest sister, Aunt Jolene blew into town in the middle of the night.
She was armed with knowledge, ready to straighten us up, and make us all do right.
My children would do this and that,...

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The mean old housecat has bulgy eyes
when she looks at us in our fish bowl
Oh, how much we've come to despise
that big mouth of hers, the black hole

Poised to pounce with sharpened claws
She's taking jabs...

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Upon entering the hotel she felt a shiver go down her spine 
the carpet seemed stained by something that looked like wine
He cleared his throat then with two spindly fingers passed her 
an old rusted...

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It’s true, the afternoon is young;
I’ll make a bet:
Before the sun has set,
Strawberries will have sprung
From underneath your tongue.

Delectable, yes, tres delish
You won’t forget: 
Exceeded, not just met,
Beyond your wildest wish,
A creamy berry dish.

The finest,...

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Pop ups
&
Cookies

Just seen an advert
Enquiring if i need the services ?
Of a life coach

Swipped left and then thought

Exactly what and where the hell ?

Do you study to become 1 of them

The Circus
Or an amusement park

Best...

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The mean old housecat has bulgy eyes
when she looks at us in our fish bowl
Oh, how much we've come to despise
that big mouth of hers, the black hole

Poised to pounce with sharpened claws
She's taking jabs...

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"...Dominus orationem meam suscepit."


Burning his little jelly bottom raw,
He blisters in his liquid greenish poop.
He has no means to summon us at all 
To drain the acid swamp of split pea soup.
Except to scream, a...

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Ghost Buster’s Eve
‘Tis the time
to shoot slime.

Adults Only Costume Party
Sex kittens prance.
Sultry nurses dance.

Party Food
Served eyeball soup
and goopity goop

A Bobbing Good Time?
Apple I get;
face sopping wet!

House of Creeps
The chainsaw guy
made me cry

A-Maze-ing Fright
Lost girl walks
where...

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The Battle


“Open up; it’s yummy,”
Mom lied to me.
Her eyes held mirth,
Of that I could see.

I did what I could.
I turned this way then that.
But what I really could have used,
Was a baseball bat.

It was hopeless...

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