Long Baloney Poems

The Pied Piper from New York City – Part One

Dare his name be said?
I say, of course, Yes! 

The Pied Piper, himself, is the man, the myth, the legend.
And they, the so-called incurious lot of...

Read More

Part 9

A trial was formed with the Captain as Judge
    With the good Doctor to frame the debate.
While the Dancer was pressed to the Atheist's grudge
    And the crew...

Read More

Rum had heard the rumour, “There’s a great new movie out.”
He asked around to find out what the plot might be about
It’s a tale of dogs so naughty, folk won’t go outdoors
Twas Ronnie Rat that...

Read More

June 2, 2014 at 7:26pm

 Too much testosterone in our Bologna

too much testosterone-e in our baloney

killed the dignity of our femininity.

Stepped out of my character onto front

lines, armed with cocktails, rocks, and lighters

Mothers, warriors, and...

Read More

Fragrance of Life  ©

Cool rain drums on blistering 
asphalt, the scent streams into 
the nostrils--hot, grassy smell of 
summer, freshly cut-smoky 
cedar lingers on the air 

Fresh popcorn drenched in 
butter, I sit in...

Read More

According to a very close and informed personal friend of mine:

"The taxpayers of the United States are currently support 25 million illegal immigrants,
(that the Biden/Harris's administration has let into the United States.)  Meaning that...

Read More

I've spent so much time trying to write a good poem, that I've ignored the possibility of
BAD POETRY.

Bad poetry,
the soul speaks in cat-whispers,
I meow one back,
The garden bleeds living colour,
I sprout something too, words,
and if...

Read More

when on a lark, this primate shut his eyes
   until sight formed slits doubling up as a wink
this earthling stared hard and scrunched brow
   unintentionally mimicking,

   the familiar Auguste...

Read More

This be said, a sad a state,
How long can heroes duly wait?,
Everything has got a name,
Be brave to call it so, a game!

The world amidst all confusion be,
This for that and that for this, tossed...

Read More

Our suffering merits the celestial, gentle waves bearing the message of love.
I venture not to fall sleep, and keep absorbing nature's enchanting spell, enough mourning in anguish, and revive!
"The old world keep unfolding in your...

Read More

      It could have been me,
      It might have been you.
      Race and color is baloney,
    ...

Read More

Democrats are known for making things right, but republicans always lie about everything.
Everybody knows that the democratic party will run the republican party out of the U.S.
Congress and run all of its offices every day...

Read More

PHONEY BALONEY

They said:
"We've come here from head office, to help you reach your quota 
It's a selfless act on our part and we're going to devote a
Day or two to set you right and get...

Read More

White man in the jungle;
Inner city ghetto Harlem;
Gramps getting old;
I was just a main streamer;
None of this makes any sense;
He’s not getting any younger walkin round town;
Ghetto town trin to be bad real hip now...

Read More

What a great title for how I feel!
Was never chained to be a potato peel.

After eighteen, I learned to follow my own stars.
I acted, was in movies and naughty Pangie met writers, actors 
and even famed musicians  in...

Read More

I’m writing to you this now because it has come to my attention that this is a serious issue.

You are so very beautiful,
so intelligent, caring and kind. And you have so much to offer.
Offering your...

Read More

Once upon a time when I was just but a little a boy
My grandmother of illustrious memory – told me many a story
A lot of them funny but some scary 
But her favourite tale which...

Read More

A Serving of Genocide With the Turkey

By Elton Camp

Thanksgiving meat should be baloney
Because the holiday’s origin is phony
Pilgrims came to an inhabited land
Got help from the natives at hand

Without their assistance it’s clear
They wouldn’t have...

Read More

THERE'S RUDOLPH, FROSTY, SANTA CLAUS AND GOOD OLD EBENEEZER
THERE'S CAROLS SUNG BY EVERYONE FROM KISS ON THROUGH TO WHEEZER
THERE'S CD'S OUT FROM NAT KING COLE, THE BOSTON POPS HAVE TWO
THERE'S  ONE OUT  NEIL...

Read More

When love disappoints does it mean you’re not loved,
Could it be that the blame’s perhaps shared,
Assumptions in place that you’ve never discussed,
Or a grievance that you’ve never aired?

Is mind reading really a love merit badge,
Or...

Read More

Sandwich Island!...that perfect retreat
Say's "Lay in the sun..you fatty..and eat."
All of your innards..as your only ploy,
Luscious you bid me.."partake and enjoy."

Caught in the middle..like baloney on rye
Making me think all my dreams you'll supply.
Flush you...

Read More

I may be all wet, but I sure ain't no bluenose!
And, while it's none of my beeswax,
Let's have a bull session-lesson !
Take a gander around, and tell the guy with the cheaters
I'll give him an...

Read More

There was a rumor that I heared ‘bout Pete
Goin’ and committin’ matrimony—
But that’s likely as ol’ Scratch getting’ beat,
And who said it is full of baloney!

But John-Bob done says he was the best man
And shore...

Read More

I glanced out my window watchin' kids plod along to school today.
I recalled my school days and how things have changed along the way
I watched the little fellers hunched over with their over-loaded packs.
'Tis a...

Read More

Said the short man in the three inch lifts, 
To the woman with the Botox lips, 
“People today are all so phony 
How can we know what’s not baloney? 
How do we find out what...

Read More