Funny Limerick Poems

there was a young man from Seville
whose wife's voice was chillingly shrill
	he said please shut up
	he’d more than enough
sending him looking for advil!

(caveat: no endorsement...

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there was a boy named Cory
one night he claimed great glory
	his moniker came
	he arose to fame
his snoring laudatory...

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there was a girl named Alice
preferred to write while braless
 	wrote poems by rules
	while wearing her mules
her fingers were getting a callous

the contest rules were...

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local sponge diver big deel

lacking personal appeal

jumped into a lake

procured a fish cake

and bumped an electric eel.
...

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     MADONNA             ...

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Rev up, rev up
engine roaring racing such
never boring lighting fast

birthday blast cars vroom-vroom
Carlin's runs on females hearts

3/13/23
Written words by James Edward Lee Sr. 2023©
...

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there once was a man from Kingsbury
who put on his kilt in a hurry
	in a bit of a flap
	he forgot his jockstrap
a chill wind put...

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there once was a woman named Mimi
she never would wear a bikini
	when she was asked why
	she didn’t blink an eye
said, “I’ve eaten too much linguine!”...

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There was a German Shepherd named George
Who - on only the best would gorge
If you offered him ground beef or fish
He would growl and cover...

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A girl who made her own pottery
learned she had just won the lottery
	she had a glazed look
	as her head she shook
her eyes like her clay...

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A pirate sailed into the Spanish bay
his luck just kept getting better that day
	“My sword has rusted
	I need it dusted.”
Aurora, the young barmaid, shouted “Ole!”...

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there once was an old farmer named Dick
he injected his cows that were sick
	Bessie mooed “oh no!”
	as Dick slipped in a hole
“Don’t you bellow, it’s...

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There once was a goat named Billy Bob Brown

Who sang horribly off-key when he danced through town. 

One day while singing, someone grabbed a long...

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   Artist and Model


      Artist asked, ‘Dear, Can you pose without dress ?’
     ...

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they say it’s just a common cold
it comes across so brash and bold
	an apple a day
	it is what they say
only healthy people were polled...

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