Perhaps I'll Know Your Love
Perhaps the light of day comes with a golden ray,
to push the heavy shadows to the side...
Just let me come on home.
Let me finally unload this pain.
Perhaps you'll look past these scars...
and the tears I try so hard to hide,
emotions of a weary soul
hurting deep inside.
Perhaps a life will have love,
not pretending to be...
Every word rolls off the tongue
to carry me, or pull me to your side.
Perhaps someday these pieces will mend,
with reaching arms that can hold
this fragile love that we know.
Perhaps someday my smile no longer fades,
or falls exhausted by my side...
screaming I'm alright.
Perhaps I write these words of love,
praying that you will finally see
the love I've held for you...
Perhaps, someday, I won't pretend to be someone you knew.
Perhaps, someday, you'll love me too.
Debra
heartache long road to recovery
I watch you laugh with her,
A spark in your eye that never turns my way.
In the quiet corners of my heart,
I hold a love you’ll never see.
I catch glimpses when you look away,
Moments that might have been mine.
You speak and smile with her,
And I fold myself quietly into the space beside.
I stay close in the small things,
The brush of your hand, the sound of your laugh.
Even if you don’t notice me now,
My love drifts softly, waiting to be seen.
I imagine what it would be like,
To be the one you turn to first,
To share a moment that could have been ours,
A spark that lingers, even just for a second.
Maybe I’ll catch your eye across the room,
A fleeting look that says nothing, yet everything.
A pause that holds a quiet possibility,
Where for a moment, it could be just us.
Yet, I remain,
A quiet witness to your joy,
Hoping, perhaps,
One day, you’ll see me too.
She wanders where the salt-mist clings,
A pale silhouette on the shore,
While in her heart, a sorrow sings
For him who sails the deep once more.
Her gown is woven from the spray,
Her eyes are mirrors of the tide;
She watches through the dying day
With nowhere left for grief to hide.
The waves deliver only foam,
The gulls cry out a lonely plea;
She waits for him to turn for home,
From out the dark and restless sea.
Though seasons shift and stars turn cold,
And years dissolve in silver light,
Her vigil remains as it was of old,
A phantom flame against the night.
How long does heartache last when we are so empty almost hollow
CAN IT BE
Can it be Christmas with a strong emotion of no feeling
Can it be Christmas if the good times feel bad
Can it be Christmas if the carols have no music
Can it be Christmas if the food is tasteless
Can it be Christmas If the packages have no gifts
Can it be Christmas with a crowded lonely house
Can it be Christmas on a cold dreary silent night
Can it be Christmas with lights flashing darkness
Can it be Christmas with blank written cards
Can it be Christmas with dead traditions
Can it be Christmas when it’s just a date on the calendar
Can it be Christmas if Joy is absent and Hope is gone
Dusk shone lavender toned skies upon the mountain field
where scattered trees with wizened limbs were steeled to ground.
High grass tickled their small legs while they giggled and ran.
Intoxicated by freedom from rules and the summon of fireflies,
they were four cousins with jars on a lark never known before.
All under nine but two would wake the morn to lifelong heartache.
I hear the screams
And every moan
But nothing’s as it seems,
Every day the light beams,
Birds have flown,
I hear the screams,
The moon still gleams,
The ball is thrown,
But nothing’s as it seems,
Form teams,
Stand upon a throne,
I hear the screams,
She beats and creams,
Clothes are sewn,
But nothing’s as it seems,
Water flows down streams,
Everyone’s alone.
I hear the screams,
But nothing’s as it seems.
Twilight haze sears like veld fire in my veins that keep you alive,
Each look from you unleashes a hurricane inside my heart,
I Savor your voice,it hauls me in to its rip-roaring wickedness--
I stay here
Your Oshun styled gate carries you past the candlelight,
A fairy in the street in The Mother City,
Fingers like infernos,they touch nothing,still I am shaken-
Heart clings to memories.
I glide after the glimmer of your smile into twilight,
Anxiety in my chest,I shiver with desire for you,
Dreams shatter around me,yet I remain charmed,restless-
I can't free myself.
Victoria,blazing like sunrise on raging summertime,
Days cannot time the flame that swells at you leaving,
Each fleeting gaze keeps my heart fiery,scorched with passion-
I refuse to yield,
Endless midnights,-your bouquet lingers,
I keep the room dim,the night repeats your whisper,
My soul studies absence,a quiet defiance-
I remain here.
Chess calms my e;I uncork a hellish move in hellish and checkmate my anguish,
Sojourns in Milky Town and Pirara soothes my heartache
Baldwin and jazz saves me,Kippie's horn,Spokes's flute-
Humane Ubuntu is me.
Silence whispers beside my empty bed,
Even loneliness whimpers to flee my side.
The darkness deepens the starkness of my fear,
Yet my mind is made — I won’t beg heartache back.
Of what use is a marriage in which love exists
Only in my mind, never in my home?
Whines and nags were the only music~
the winds played when my soul begged for rest.
Today I met your footsteps that went outdoors
And begged never to be allowed back in —
Even if your knocks dent my door with persistence.
My mind finds peace where you have hidden it.
So long as life befriends my soul and mind,
So loneliness finds peace within its depth,
So I can sleep and close my eyes without~
the fear that a knife might pierce a hole in my heart,
So emptiness can bring back my sanity.
Please—never reply to the plea of my loneliness,
To fill it with the trouble twelve years taught it to love.
And never mind emptiness begging you
to stock it with your figure filled with hatred, not love.
I've always thought love was made for fools
Who dance on clouds and wish on pennies in pools
And I'm determined that foolish is something l won’t be
So I’ve kept my heart under lock and key
Love is at first sight, and yet its blind
It's with all of your heart and it's out of your mind
And it never made sense to me, so I laid down the law
Said that love is just not for me, and called it a draw
It's easier to cope if my heart's made of stone
It's less pain tomorrow if tonight I’m alone
And I scoffed at the fools with their empty hopes
Displaying their wishes by hanging them on ropes
Dreams were a risk I couldn’t afford to take
So while the fools slept, I forced myself to stay awake
Because I knew that eventually, those ropes would fray
If you build too tall a tower, at some point, it will sway
And a building that stood for many a year
Can be standing one moment, then the next, disappear
So I stuck with my piano, which hasn't let me down yet
I can play beautiful solos, so who needs a duet?
And I stayed away from love, I obeyed my one rule
Cause if I keep my heart safe, I will never be a fool
Memories linger, like shadows on her wall,
A tapestry woven, with threads of trials, falls, and all,
She recalls the pain, the heartache, and the strife,
But in it she finds a glimmer of life.
For every scar, a story, a lesson learned,
A testament to her strength, heart yearned,
To rise above, to persevere, to thrive,
Tears fell, but they're not just of sorrow,
But also of triumph, of a life borrowed,
From the depths of darkness, she emerged, she grew,
And in her memories, her true self is shown.
"How time flies," she says, with a gentle, knowing smile,
Her eyes, a reflection, of a life worth one's while
A reminder of her strength, a heart that won't subside.
Grab the steeple and pretend
The life you had would end
Months gone we move along
We still hear whispers friend
Moulded night drowns flight
Drenched withered dred
Victimized, the whites, her eyes
Consumed chemical bed
If I pretend to lie and mend
What lesson ever learned?
Escaping safety sleepy daisy
The peddles pulled and again
Echoed wave, waned moons fade
This is the darkest hour
Admitting fault and not exalt
Lies the laureled flower
Design your time and keep in mind
Evading isn't owning fate
As you had presumed this final move
Bankrupt that fatal freight
Vindictive lips once did kiss
Solemn they were a home
And forgotten passion project
Rotten to the bone
Mourning hearts mooring marks
Flee shattered scenes
Believed to be deceased at peace
Was my own response to misery
Childhood abandonment
makes you miss everyone
you've met and all of
the people you're
yet to meet.
It makes you hug
differently, and love
more passionately.
But on the flipside,
it makes you hyper-independent,
and it makes you push people
away when they get closest
to you.
I'd tell you goodbye,
but I can never bring myself
to do it.
Nobody important to me
has ever said it - not a single
one.
And so,
I linger,
in the spaces between
holding on and letting go,
waiting for someone to prove
they won't leave.
Though deep down,
I already know.
You're already gone,
and you haven't
been listening.
Silence cuts the marrow.
Tears carve stone in ribs.
Shadows weigh the chest.
A pulse breaks stillness.
Grief learns its own voice.
Words crack but still breathe.
Let pain speak at last.
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