Silence cuts the marrow.
Tears carve stone in ribs.
Shadows weigh the chest.
A pulse breaks stillness.
Grief learns its own voice.
Words crack but still breathe.
Let pain speak at last.
In the dawn's gentle light, I see my mistake,
On our special day, I caused your heartache.
Forgive my foolishness, my words out of line,
I never meant to tarnish our love's shine.
With every breath, I regret the pain I caused,
In moments of anger, reason was paused.
But in the morning's glow, I see clear,
I'm sorry, my love, for my actions sincere.
Let me make amends, let me make it right,
I'll hold you close through the darkest night.
For in your embrace, I find my peace,
My love for you will never cease.
My heart is breaking in pieces
And being ripped out of me
This heartache is for the ones
I broke without showing mercy
Living this life without you
The pain is all that I can take
And what makes it even worse
Is that I caused this heartbreak
If I were able to go back in time
And alter all that I did wrong
You be here in my arms tonight
Which is right were you belong
But I can't go back in time
And resolve the things I did
I'm stuck in reality with regret
With a heartache I cannot rid
My heart no longer beats as it did before
With each thump there’s a rattle you now hear
You wonder at first then you realize
The look in my eyes makes the reason clear
It’s from the pieces of my broken heart
That were just to far beyond any repair
The only one that I can blame for this
Is none other then me causing my despair
There’s something wrong with me
Hidden deep in the wiring of my mind
So many have tried to discover it
But there’s nothing they’re able to find
People have loved me deeply in life
And for that alone were pushed away
I can still see how their faces looked
Every drop of pain was there on display
All my emotions are covered by a mask
So they will never know how much I care
I will never put my heart up on exhibit
My feelings I simply refuse to bare
And I hate myself for being this way
Wanting to cause this self made headache
I’ve made this road rougher than needed
And though it hurts it’s not too much to take
Ruining my life has become my addiction
I enjoy when the pain gets to be so severe
I’ve slowly torn my life apart unnecessarily
So I do this out of hatred or is it fear
High on life
I was high on life
Not walking on water
But soaring above the clouds
Free from the rain
Immune to the darkness
Now I settle in the depths
Gazing up at the warped sunshine
Turbulent waters
Was this where I was before?
“Weeping willow’s silent wail …” — Poet
Dead of night
thoughts of you
length and breadth
our derring-do
love overwhelms
flooding through
emotions swirl
as I cling to you …
^ ^^ ^^^
I
s
l
i
p
u
n
d
e
r
engulfed in heartache
in the dead of night
Burning like fever in the spring
our love affair was on the wing
then drifted away on the summer wind
now I'm thinking of you
how good it used to be
holding on to precious memories
and every teardrop has a tale to tell
every teardrop fills a wishing well
changing like autumn leaves that fall
your love it comes and goes
then melts away with the winter snows
and I'm dreaming of you
things we used to do
holding out for those eyes of blue
and every teardrop it blinds reminds
every little teardrop brings me back to you
would that I could
say the words to mend
the heartache heartbreak
of this summer's end
I see the shadow in your eyes,
The quiet war you try to hide.
Still, I stay, still I wait--
Drawn to every twist of fate.
On a bed of thorns, I close my eyes,
And count the tears I can't disguise.
What do I hold, when your hands let go?
What do I keep, when I already know?
I can't breathe in, and I can't let go--
What do I hold, when you won't show?
You say you care, but you're not near--
I give it all, and drown in fear.
I breathe in love, but choke on doubt,
Still I wait, still I bleed it out.
What do I hold, when your hands let go?
What do I keep, when I already know?
I can't breathe in, and I can't let go--
What do I hold, when you won't show?
And I give myself away,
Yes, I give myself away.
I give and I give,
Till there's nothing left to say.
My soul is tied,
My body bruised,
Left here standing
With nothing to choose.
Still I give myself away,
Even when you look away--
I give and I give,
Though you never ask me to stay.
What do I hold, when the fire runs cold?
What do I keep, when the silence grows bold?
I can't breathe in, and I can't let go--
What do I hold, when I already know?
I touched the sky, left the land
Dwindling in the galaxy, I felt your hand.
The Perseus sparkling through my eyes
The twilight fading between my cries.
Your hand helped me climb to my throne
Ornately beautiful, a kind of its own!
The clock turned by , my sorrows withered
The throne was my crown, your hand was my tether.
The glorious days passed, passed through my breathing agony
The Crown had started rusting, I heard some cacophony.
Your grip was getting stronger, my worries piled up
I wanted to let you go, the courage I could never muster.
My Thrown destroyed, my crown burnt
I am left with a heart ache, a morbid hunt.
Your hand has held me tighter since, I feel an urge
To hold it through my heart, but my tears put me on a searing verge.
I need some time, I need my guilt to seep through
But I cannot afford to lose your grip; Yes , It’s true!
I cannot leave your hand , you feel so close
But my past glory keeps questioning my roads.
I want to walk with you and not leap to the sky
I want to touch the land again, please help me try.
Speak your melodies
and I'll dream of harmonies
that will someday be befitting of your artistry
Similarly
Voice your euphony
and I'll dream of poetry
that will someday be worthy
of your flattery,
and lure you into rhapsody -
pure ecstasy with each word
that breathes between the pages
from beneath those eyes
that never cease to critique,
and a breath that reeks of deceit
and deserted dreams that I still cling to
It's funny. The mind goes there and back,
Switching between lyre to inspire -
And the sober thoughts of black.
If all I love is theory,
And if all I know is fiction,
Then why do eyes get teary,
To the tune of my prediction?
I could dream a thousand times,
And play the songs that flow.
If nothing else at least it rhymes,
With my heart and face aglow.
It's funny. The mind goes there and back,
Switching to inquire and tire -
All the sober thoughts of black.
It's far more fun to forget,
And to sing for what excites.
In ignorance it's nice to get,
A chance to see the lights.
Even if these words won't last,
I don't mind their stay for now.
Lyrics should be slow not fast,
We don't have to wonder how.
It's funny. The mind is taken aback,
Switching inspire to quiet fire -
And smoke's sober thoughts of black.
Take good care of your precious pain.
Wrap your strong arms around it.
Hold it against your warm chest.
Rock it gently,
telling it softly that it is loved.
It is needed.
It is important.
It makes perfect sense.
And love it, just as it is,
in all of its agonizing beauty.
i forgot the words and hummed along
As the music fell silent
And the band went home
Your voice was so quiet
Like a page torn from a book
That I had read but somehow forgot
Many years before
What we had was over
Long before you left me
Or maybe it was the other
way around
They say you never forget
But with time the pain eases
It did for me but one night
I tore the wound back open
Maybe because
I felt a need
To watch it bleed again
And now the softness of your voice
Plays like silver in my mind
With the velvet tone
Of home
I still think of that day,
rain pitter-pattered gently around us,
clouds were the color of gravel.
Your smile broke through shadows,
and our laughter mingled like gold.
Paint splattered against a canvas-
that's what we were.
Unpredictability. Chaos. Adoration.
Does any of it make sense?
Does it not make you want to crawl out of your skin and sink into the what if?
3/2/35 03:19
I glorify men
Placing them high on a pedestal
Where my father fell short
The bar is in hell
And the bare minimum are the crumbs I live off
Satiated from nothing and empty promises
An illusion of fullness
As I see myself in half
As I saw myself in half
As I stand here with a void desperate to be filled
Take me served up on a silver platter
Ill intentions disguised as good deeds
And deflection paired with belittlement right on time
The light within me dims when I’m faced with their conditioning
And the fire is lit
Am I being gaslit?
I hook my claws onto potential
As my reflection bounces back at me
Disguised as I swim in the delusion of what they’re telling me
Words so loud and action rarely found
I abandon myself at the sight of basic decency
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