Egads Poems | Examples


Premium MemberPancaked

Perhaps, we will go out. Grandma will get
A break from making breakfast?
Not! But the kid likes Grandma’s hot
Cakes,
And I love this
Kid, in a syrupy kind of way.
Egads, I better get cooking, butter in the pan;
Deadly, this-kid-is-hungry-looks.
Categories: egads, food, humor,
Form: Acrostic

Premium Memberpaying the piper

The soup has a shortage of ads
Let’s call for more saying egads! 
While they interfere
With the reason we’re here
We'll learn about doodads and fads
Categories: egads, angst, humor, irony,
Form: Limerick


Premium MemberStrawberry Ice Cream

Egads! It’s a hot afternoon ~~
100 degrees in the shade
Ice cream,
   Ice cream,
      Ice cream!
I NEED ICE CREAM!!!!
      Cup, dish, or cone?
      Cone. Plain or rippled
      Plain.
      What flavor?
      Strawberry.
      Fresh or frozen?
      Huh?
JUST GIVE ME THE DAMN ICE CREAM!!!!!
      Stick out your tongue, Sir!


Written June 21, 2022
For “Ice Cream” Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Julia Ward
Categories: egads, fun, humorous,
Form: Free verse

His Annual Moment

A-nother 
B-irthday 
R-emembrance 
A-dvances 
H-is 
A-nnual 
M-oment 

S-imply 
A-pplying 
D-edication 
O-f 
R-egads 
R-ight 
A-way 

Topic: Birthday of Bro. Abraham C. Sadorra (February 22) 
Form: Vertical Monocrostic
Categories: egads, birthday,
Form: Acrostic

Premium MemberLaugh - Fives

Moshe, Larry, Curly,
Howls, cries, nyuks;
Three silly comic stars:
Smile, clown -- Cluck!

Chico, Harpo, Benny, Berle,
Moron grins, happy chins;
Crazy nutty comic kooks:
Funny jokes -- egads zooks!  

Alvin Ailey, dance gaily,
False teeth: Brush daily; 
Silly Sally, Dilly-dally,
Ollie, Holly, Mollie!

Belly flops, fatal plops, 
Messy slops, lemon drops;
Harry Caray, Tooth Fairy,
Music Maven -- Chuck Berry.

Pitty-patty, kitty-katty,
Ticky-tacky, Cinci-nnati
Polly-Wolly, Wooly Bully,
Diffy-daffy, Laughy Taffy!

   
       March 22, 2018
    
     Contest entry in "A little laughter five," sponsored by
     Edward McCall, closing date - March 23, 2018


Notes:  Moe Howard's (of the Three Stooges) actual first name was Moshe.
  'Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk' was a trademark line of Curly (3 Stooges.) 
   Berle is comedian: Milton Berle (aka 'Uncle Miltie').
  'Egads zooks' is an exclamation my mother and others of her
   generation used to use (frequently). 
  'Wooly Bully' was a pop song by Sam the Sham and the Pharoahs,
   released in 1965; it soared high on the Top-40 charts.
Categories: egads, fun, humorous, nonsense, silly,
Form: Light Verse


Premium MemberEgads and Little Fishes

“Egads and little fishes”
Reminds me of my dear old mum
Covering her head uttering this phrase
Thunder made her come undone

Terrified by each electrical storm
Dear mum would nearly passed out
With thunder, lightning, and pelting rain
She'd cower in a corner throughout

Really felt bad, she was truly scared
Tried hard not to laugh at the sight
Of mum with her apron over her head
Praying hard with all of her might

Things that happen during childhood days
Stay with us as by us life swishes
I'll always remember mum's little saying
“Egads and little fishes”


© Jack Ellison 2013
Categories: egads, humorous, mom, mum,
Form: Quatrain

Running Chestnut- Syntax-Ing

is it a noun or is a verb um																		  to ing or not to ing question                																  my son to patronize a thing 																	 gerunds ung unga to ingaz                                                                                                  not beggar belong to egads 																	 																	not like cave man talk but suffix's 																runnen ans end mind affixes 																	the word things we call ing's  																	running to flow agitating																		 syntax your mind along the lang 																darling short for to be the slang 																	suffice to be or not to be 																 suspense supine a rhyme came thee
Categories: egads, allegory, funny, on work
Form: Free verse

I'D Rather Starve

Is Oil tasty?
The filthy crude;
what is the allure?
It isn't food.

Yet here I stand be-trodden;
astonished at what I see,
everyone is eating Oil;
how can this be? How can this be?

They put it on their toast,
they put it in their cheese,
they slurp it whole-
and with such ease.

The thought makes me recoil;
people are eating OIl;
It's in every mouth,
in every belly,
chased down with petroleum jelly;
egads it's sick-(ick).

This cannot be healthy;
It cannot be sane,
who in their right mind would do this?
Do I shout in vain?

The madness cannot last;
it simply can't go on,
It's just a phase, it'll pass
I'll try to regain my calm.

EEP!!!!
Headline(Front page)
Oil too popular-
Food is obsolete.

Oil is now the official food of earth;

starvation...what a treat.
Categories: egads, funny
Form: I do not know?

Egads! Winter Wind--

Egads! Winter wind-- 
drumming up my olive trees,
with lethargic notes
Categories: egads, nature, sea, seasons, time
Form: Haiku

Fairy Tale Flounderings

That steamy summer day
At age fourteen and three months
I stood awaiting the kiss
Of the tall, dark, handsome hunk 

My stomach was in knots
As terror snaked up my throat
Would he think it was okay?
Would he, with flowery words, emote?

His luscious lips descended
As I closed unbelieving eyes
A thrill rushed through my body
I was weak from feet to thighs

Then, suddenly, his tongue
Darted out and squished around
In a sloppy and slathering mess
My feet never left the ground

When the “kiss” was over
I couldn’t look at him the same
He was a dog; no longer a boy
And, now, I don’t recall his name




Inspired by John Heck's contest, "Egads, My First Kiss?"
Categories: egads, funny, love, teen
Form: Light Verse
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