She was dressed like a flamingo floozie
Her big boobs and booty ~ what a doozie!
Wearing a shade of pink
She flirted with a wink
I ran away from Wicked Witch, Soozie
Soozie was once a he-man. Way back when
Turned into a Barbie doll... do ya Ken?
Overdid the implants
Axed the bulge in her pants
I heard tell her name used to be Big Ben
*Finding a balance between writing humor and serious poetry.
I try but will never be as well-rounded as Soozie... Thank Goodness!
Categories:
doozie, humor,
Form: Limerick
Although my house needs a good cleaning,
toward an old movie, I’m leaning.
This dark, lurid doozie
about a young floozy
will save me from work so demeaning.
HMS and PS both say 9 9 6 6 9.
May 30, 2022
entered in Tania Kitchin's Funny Limerick Contest
Categories:
doozie, work,
Form: Limerick
That muffled sound you hear is Susie.
She’s still talking. What a doozie!
At her appointed time to die,
her mouth refused, and that’s no lie.
September 13, 2018, entered in Jesse Rowe's Funny Epitaph Contest
November 16, 2020
entered in Brian Strand's Quat-ro Your Four Line Poetry Contest Placed 1st
August 23, 2021
entered in the Your Best Four-Line Light verse No 2 Poetry Contest
Sponsor: L. Milton Hankins Placed 1st
Categories:
doozie, death, thanksgiving day,
Form: Light Verse
I saw her comin', guitar a hummin,
An' a smile on her face lit up the night
I said,"My you're pretty, but this ain't the city -
You're ridin' alone an' travellin' light."
She said,"That I am an' his name was Sam,
An' I caught him with some red haired floozie.
Gave his keys a toss an' forgot the loss -
Went to the bar an' had me a doozie."
Well I liked that tale an' since I'm a male
I offered to help however I could.
She laughed real low, said, "Wherever I go
I can always find some cowboy who would."
She smiled,"No thanks",then slapped the pony's flanks
As she rode off into the pitch black night.
I sat on my hoss and pondered this loss,
An' wondered at her travellin' so light.
Out of the dark came a dog with a bark,
An' a sheriff with a frown on his face.
Said he'd come far for a gal an' guitar
For she'd shot old Sam in a mortal place.
Well,I said,"No, - I didn't see her go."
An' was thankful she hadn't stayed the night.
He had no clue what that woman could do
While playin' guitar an' travellin' light.
9/19/2017
Categories:
doozie,
Form: Rhyme
SHE’S OUT OF MY LEAGUE-ZEE
YOU’LL WIND UP BLACK AND BLUE IF YOU CALL HER A FLOOZIE
IN FRONT OF ME ONE HAD NEVER DARE CALL HER A DAMNABLE DOOZIE
AND EVEN WORSE I AM THE ONLY ONE ALLOWED FOR HER TO MAKE ME WOOZIE
THE HEADLINES THE NEXT DAY WOULD SCREAM “MAN ENDS UP BLACK AND BLUESIE”
BECAUSE I HAVE THE GREATEST RESPECT FOR THE POETRY OF MS. DEBBIE GOOZIE
~free cee!~
Categories:
doozie, angst, me,
Form: Rispetto
SHE’S OUT OF MY LEAGUE-ZEE
YOU’LL WIND UP BLACK AND BLUE IF YOU CALL HER A FLOOZIE
IN FRONT OF ME ONE HAD NEVER DARE CALL HER A DAMNABLE DOOZIE
AND EVEN WORSE I AM THE ONLY ONE ALLOWED FOR HER TO MAKE ME WOOZIE
THE HEADLINES THE NEXT DAY WOULD SCREAM “MAN ENDS UP BLACK AND BLUESIE”
BECAUSE I HAVE THE GREATEST RESPECT FOR THE POETRY OF MS. DEBBIE GOOZIE
~free cee!~
Categories:
doozie, death, me,
Form: Rhyme Royal
Cancer is a tricky performer,
like a demon it takes possession of
peoples' bodies, with lots of melodrama,
whether or not they are ready,
the Cancer is prepared to start a relationship,
by declaring it's going steady with whomever
it chooses,
to a normal unsuspecting person,
It becomes a doozie,
It turns its patients into shell of themselves,
unrecognizeable, after bouts of hell,
Sometimes hard for family members to tell,
nothing short of an excorcism
can make Cancer lose its vigor and vim,
Cancer gains notoriety through all the tests
and research,
being lauded in Great Halls and Churches
Then suddenly a star emerges,
Sometimes we forget that the patient deserves
some credit,
but Cancer doesn't like to share the limelight,
or welcomes edits,
It wants to be El Numero Uno,
the defining stick of dynamite,
rocking its victims' world
until it is stirred and shaken,
Finally declaring victory when its
victims never awaken.
Categories:
doozie, health, cancer,
Form: I do not know?
It always seemed year after year
When Thanksgivin’ time came near—
That Toothie, our ol’ grouch coosie
Fixed chow that was a doozie.
And every year he just swore
Would be better that before—
‘Course it always was just jerky
And not tasty wild turkey!
This year Toothie was diffident—
Swore it would be different—
Got mouths waterin’ fer drumsticks
And no more of his dumb tricks.
And sure ‘nuff on that turkey day,
It was roastin’ right away—
Though it sure looked long and skinny—
We wouldn’t whine or whinny.
Though it did seem to have long ears,
None of us had any fears—
And we belched as was our habit
Though we knew it was jack rabbit!
That feast turned out to be our best
On a campfire I would guess—
Ol’ Toothie sure enough came through
With his roasted ‘turkey’ stew.
So it would be a year again
Till that coosie was our friend—
When he promised again the bird
And we took him on his word!
Categories:
doozie, cowboy-western, faith, food, friendship,
Form: Cowboy Poetry