Their ma & pa were Eastenders
Blah blah..don’t remember the Blitz
Brash Cockney pretenders..same flash apparel
Let's get our mitts on a stash of Aperol spritz
Dimwits just going on benders
Bawdy tawdry mockney skits
Gits getting off their t*ts
Twits showing off their bits
Who fits?..Identikit Brits..pout
All about the clout of gaudy glitz
Silhouettes of stiletto dancers & handbags
Riff raff as naff as an 80’s cornetto
Perms & permatans..sl*gs..fancy dans in glad rags
Rhyming slang falsetto twang libretto
Chancers on a stag..s*ag nip & tuck hags
Nags of WAGS made up to the nines
Brag after cocaine lines did blag
One snag..look like a dag in drag
All from the fashion label stable
No restraint.. cannot refrain
Grandstand the brands fable
Diadora diaspora ..Fila Villa
With a Pierre Cardin Jardin
Taint just like they do in Spain
Sex..success…the way you dress
Prosecco fizz...getting in a tizz
Gilded specs and builded pecs
Greed and that need to impress
Avoid don't feed this schadenfreude hell
That is indeed called Costa Del ESSEX
Categories:
dimwits, celebrity,
Form: Rhyme
Scots golfers do not 'golf'
as they say in the U.S.A.
invented in Scotland
it's as they ought
a sport the Scottish play
the first tennis player
known by name
(Louis X)
did not 'tennis'
when he played the game
even so I may one day
bend my elbow
consider the racket
and give it a go
looks like the language
is slowly downward drifting
and come this Christmas
you won't see me 'gifting'
when did a noun become a verb
misconjugated by ignorant clowns
as English is oft Yanked and twisted
by illiterate dimwits verbing nouns
Categories:
dimwits, golf, humorous, sports, usa,
Form: Rhyme
Veracious vanity about victories over
veils shows vain values corrupted by
vicious volatile villains in hopes for
votive to vindicate,
Grossly gluttons gain grains over
gloomy groups of ghastly greiven gulls,
Foreign fighting by ferocious foes gets
fulfilled here by fat-headed fools
fulminating for their unknowing fatalities,
Deep dark derivatives of evil dance daily
drawing delusional dimwits to drown
devishly in damnation,
Multimedia manipulates millions
maliciously magnifying multitudes of
mass misguided many,
Local laws layover latitudes of laundered
logistics layering subliminal taxations
lowering lifestyles lived by the
Land of the Limited.
Categories:
dimwits, allusion, political, society,
Form: Alliteration
Was Backbencher
Academics Top Ranker
Sports Medal Winner
Dramas ace Performer
Backbencher Teachers pain
Not all dimwits and vain
Real life, celebrity genes in vein
Adept user of Left, Right Brain
For pranks often punished
Outside class, when I stood
Am not stupid, mind brooded
Am Polymath, briefly muted
______________________________
© Dr Hitendra Mehta, India ????
PS : The words are Reality of my School days, presented in poetic way. Have received Awards for Polymath attribute.
Categories:
dimwits, school,
Form: Free verse
Adjust and move four words for worth/
Aghast at July 4th I’ll power forward north /
Away from what’s been uncovered worse than I’ve ever been coerced
I devour and nourish as the demeanor looks gorgeous/
He could just be mean and cook gorges/
Or spree clean to book and flee out of storage in the mind/
Got to get adorned oranges to be hoarded all timed and primed/
For the reminiscence of my minutes to cinch/
Or seconds to seize as I inch through this decadence towards reverence/
I’ll replenish and diminish the sacks and lost yardage/
It’s 4th and 4 hence the past porridge to sift in historic pork/
Let’s get to the meat of the stork like underneath the bark of an oak/
I won’t sulk I’ll spark and soak in my marinade/
I stare and gaze with a glare and a glaze/
Going through phase after phase/
Placed in places where there are no choices just voices/
Demands, directions, reprimands and disciplinary actions for noises/
Their discrete dealings and doings drive dimwits down from poises/
Disillusioned durations debunk the punk directly to become disinfected from a disenchanted situation and he rejoices
Categories:
dimwits, angst, anxiety, art, character,
Form: Rhyme
Foolish folly in the house of putrid politics
Dirty deeds up their sleeves double-dealing tricks
Forgetting the homeless, ignoring the poor
Though staying between the lines of the law
Oh ! And the law, well that’s another story
One suggesting a lavish lavatory!
For the criminal not for the upstanding
Not for the meek though only demanding
Yes the pecking order is quite transparent
With suited criminals all apparent
Trickling down such bad behaviour
Praying to my only saviour-
Please help them to sow seeds of decency
Awaken the blind to the difference of recency
For this society unravels the very pits
When ruled by a bunch of moronic dimwits
With crime through the roof that hinders well-being
Many are silent with sickness from seeing
The defeated and shattered upon a tightrope
Without any justice-there is no hope!
Categories:
dimwits, hope, people, political, words,
Form: Rhyme
A Plane Flat Earther Reminder
This is merely my suggestion
I'm not contriving a rebellion
Now then___
If you believe that Earth is downright Flat
Yell, "All aboard!" sit those buns on a train
But if your brains decide you guys are nuts
Admit you are dimwits get up on the plane!
Penned: 1/20/2022
4:18 a.m.
Lake Worth
Florida USA
Categories:
dimwits, humor, satire,
Form: Rhyme
A lovely young lady lives on the Isle of Man
She writes bawdy limericks whenever she can
She takes a few hits
From jealous dimwits
Who can’t write them nearly so well as can Jan.
POEM OF THE DAY on July 10, 2021
59TH ON 100 BEST POEMS OF THE PAST MONTH on July 11, 2021
51ST ON 100 BEST POEMS OF THE PAST MONTH on August 8, 2021
written July 9, 2021
Categories:
dimwits, humorous, tribute,
Form: Limerick
Dimwits say, he said with disdain
When cows lay down it’s going to rain
And if those cows decide to stand
The day will be a lot less bland
But if some lay and some are stood?
Explain that one if you would.
But that didn’t throw me for hours
Easy I said... scattered showers
Categories:
dimwits, weather,
Form: Rhyme
He was accused as a predator turns out that he was the prey,
A mere bystander but accused as a culprit,
Locked up in the jail 'till his hair turns into grey.
Pleading for justice but it always sway,
Was charge into a crime he didn't commit,
He was accused as a predator turns out that he was the prey.
An innocent life was betrayed,
To be killed or he's the killer, he must admit,
Locked up in the jail 'till his hair turns into grey.
Money is hideous fiends' cue to obey,
To simply close their eyes and tilt their dignity a bit,
He was accused as a predator turns out that he was the prey.
Injustice can be seen anywhere, so cliché,
Impeccable human suffers because of the dimwits,
Locked up in the jail 'till his hair turns into grey.
Truth always prevail they say,
When will it happen? He's sinless, needs to be acquit,
He was accused as a predator turns out that he was the prey,
Locked up in the jail 'till his hair turns to grey.
Categories:
dimwits, betrayal, confusion, innocence, political,
Form: Villanelle
Copycat Chinstrap penguins I see you everywhere,
In shopping malls on buses mocking our precious air,
Why wear a mask underneath your chin,
Then go about in public donning an imbecilic grin,
Maybe I’m missing something the gills on your neck,
No I’m sure only fish have them, last time I checked,
Tracheostomy covers masking up your tubes,
Dimwits would you wear knickers on your boobs,
But hey it’s ok, nobody will ever notice,
Thinking we’re all dumb as you, theres the real injustice.
Podium placing promise(2) Poetry Contest
Sponsor by Brian strand 30/12/20
Categories:
dimwits, allusion, how i feel,
Form: Rhyme
Painstaking plumes of surest gait
To wield diamond steel over fate;
With slow pair of wit-guarded lips,
As otiose words sway great ships.
Invincible flair and exacting knack
To stand out from the frothy pack;
Ochred with all blue-penciled skill,
For nabob’s dimwits do mimic still.
With the far-scanning aquiline eye
That fowls unborn miles like a spy;
Plus an ear for tiniest voices tuned,
For idlest vowel by vagaries ruined.
Gigantic empathy for pinched souls
Hewn down by lot’s inclement fouls;
Felt tear for fellow wayfarers stung
By blunt luck's blade rashly swung.
A little but constant sacrifice betimes,
For bereft chum eschewed by dimes;
Or even total strangers in want of bail
Out of a jinx along existence’s icy sail.
Categories:
dimwits, allegory, anxiety, blessing, care,
Form: Didactic
Ok, you humans down there, making wishes on us stars
with “Wish I may, wish I might, have the wish I wish tonight.”
Who the heck do you people think you are?
Why are you writing poems all the time like “Star Light, Star Bright”?
Of COURSE, we’re bright and a heck of a lot brighter than YOU.
Is sitting around making wishes all you can do?
Even waiting around to see which one of us will fall? The gall!
Good grief, you’d think to see a shooting star is the greatest thing of all!
Where did you come up with “count your lucky stars,” you dimwits?
You would die a billion deaths before you finished counting my friends and me.
I get laughs hearing your gaffes, but other than that, MY life is the pits!
I wish for YOU to make ME into a MOVIE star. I’d be a diva for an eternity!
Then I could really live it up in style, like you glitzy dolts down below.
Yeah, and keep “reaching for the stars.” Let’s see how THAT goes.
July 1, 2020 for Nina Parmenter's You Are A Star Poetry Contest
Categories:
dimwits, star,
Form: Personification
There are two main problems
In this troubled world today
One is the pandemic
That refuses to go away.
The reason why this virus decided to stay
Is because the powers that be
Are determined to have their way
In handling this situation
They don't seem to have a clue.
Passing the buck to each other
Is all they seem to do
They take no responsibility
For the action, they are taking
Nearly every move they make
Is disaster in the making
Meanwhile this lethal virus
Is multiplying fast
Wondering I think
How much longer it can last
When will the dimwits
Come to their senses
And forget about the power
And start building fences
Categories:
dimwits, 10th grade,
Form: Rhyme
Who are these lug nuts?
Who are these featherweights?
Who are these slum bums?
Who are these cretins?
Who are these dimwits?
Who are these bird brains?
Who are these crumb critters?
Who are these sad sacks?
Who are these dullards?
Who are these rum raisins?
Who are these nincompoops?
Who are these louts?
Who are these Jim Dandies?
Who are these meat heads?
Who are these brow beaters?
Who are these fuddy duddies?
They all live in my bones
And sing like Tom Jones.
We are the chosen.
Later, Hosen.
Categories:
dimwits, funny,
Form: Free verse
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