You want to know the downside of Aquarius?
Just ask the folks who weren’t in Noah’s Ark,
or check out Jethro Tull and Linkin Park.
The paths we tread are manifold and various,
as Lewis learned by teaming up with Clark –
and now the Eightfold Way reveals the quark.
Is ‘humorous’ the equal of ‘hilarious’?
Is ‘mini-skirt’ the same as ‘cutty sark’?
About as similar as ‘bite’ and ‘bark’.
We take from this that language is precarious,
quite unreliable (if not nefarious):
don’t trust a man who says he’s made his mark.
Instead of “it is written”, “it is dark”:
for I have felt the sinews of the shark.
St Paul’s gazes out over the modernising City
Where the Tower shrinks in its corner
Fearful of the vicious Shard
The Abbey and Houses of Parliament
Keep Westminster alive
Under the gaze of a watchful Eye
The hustle of the restless Oxford Street
Is matched by the bustle of Soho
The British Museum still reigns supreme in Bloomsbury
Despite constant tourist invasion
On the river the Cutty Sark is rehabilitated
And Tower Bridge still opens
The Boat Race can be seen every year but not from the new Garden Bridge
St Paul’s gazes out over the modernising City
Where the Tower shrinks in its corner
Fearful of the vicious Shard
The Abbey and Houses of Parliament
Keep Westminster alive
Under the gaze of a watchful Eye
The hustle of the restless Oxford Street
Is matched by the bustle of Soho
The British Museum still reigns supreme in Bloomsbury
Despite constant tourist invasion
On the river the Cutty Sark is rehabilitated
And Tower Bridge still opens
The Boat Race can be seen every year but not from the new Garden Bridge
St Paul’s gazes out over the modernising City
Fearful of the vicious Shard
The Abbey and Houses of Parliament
Keep Westminster alive
But now under the gaze of a watchful Eye
The hustle of the restless Oxford Street
Is matched by the bustle of Soho
The British Museum still reigns supreme in Bloomsbury
Despite constant tourist invasion
On the river the Cutty Sark is rehabilitated
Tower Bridge still opens
The Boat Race can be seen every year and Cambridge can win
Wicked wind I hate you so,
I’d rather sit in ice cold snow,
Your breath is cold and touch
So fraught, I think your soul from
Devil bought
A paragraph from weather’s
Tale, you’d think you were the
Holy Grail; speeding, pushing,
Blowing crush
None escapes your windy whoosh!
Cutty Sark or clothes on bush,
Strutting, cutting, butting breeze
Lifts old maids’ dress past their knees,
Blows the lash from pretty eyes,
Takes the thrush and clouds from
Skies; no escape from this cruel jape
Windy, weather, mistral‘s shape
JACK DANIELS met JIM BEAM at the CANADIAN CLUB
to discuss their upcoming trip on the CUTTY SARK.
They were planning a vacation to a Caribbean cove
to get some SOUTHERN COMFORT.
JOHNNY WALKER, who had a disagreement with
them over their SLOE GIN game, wanted to
give them a SAKI. "VODKA ya think you're doing?"
chimed in GIBSON, who was a BEEFEATER sitting nearby.
"It's not like EARLY TIMES...so just wipe that
SMIRNOFF your face." A brawl would have started,
but a beautiful woman came in. "Look at them
COURVOISIERs," said the MARTIN MILLERs.
They noticed her ring with the BLUE SAPHIRE from
BOMBAY.
JACK DANIELS immediately lost interest in the argument,
and asked if he could sit with her. She agreed and he sat
down. He noticed that she had a B & B monogram on her blouse.
"I've not seen you here before...what's your name and where
are you from?" he asked.
In a charming southern accent she replied, "Ma name is
MARGARITA, Ahm new in town, and Ahm from HENNESSY."
When the waiter came over, they ordered two MINT JULEPS.
It was the start of a relationship that the DEWARS of them
enjoyed, especially when they bowled SCOTCH doubles together.
JACK DANIELS met JIM BEAM at the CANADIAN CLUB to discuss their upcoming trip on the
CUTTY SARK. They were planning to go south for some SOUTHERN COMFORT, but when the
ship had a fire, they thought they might have to SCOTCH their plans.
JOHNNY WALKER, who had a disagreement with them over their SLOE GIN game, wanted to
give them both a SAKI in the nose. "VODKA ya think you're doing?! cried JIM and JACK.
"It's not like EARLY TIMES!!"
CAPTAIN MORGAN came over, and BRANDY, the waitress, brought his VO to their table. He
tried to calm things down by talking about his last trip. "How BLUE CURACAO was...and the
mornings were alive with the TULLAMORE DEW!" He said.
"You've got a lot of GALIANO...to interrupt us like this!!" They RUMbled.
Before a TRIPLE SEC had passed, the CHRISTIAN BROTHERS were there to calm all the
DEWERS down and restore a HYPNOTIQ sense of peace, ALIZE for the time being.
For their efforts, they were awarded with shouts of SHIRAZ and the thanks of the king of the
club. He was not wearing his 7 CROWN, but instead, his CROWN ROYALE.
Sometimes there is a need for reality
Like the wrinkles and roughness of an old down Mainer
Sure P town and The Vinyard are nice and touristy
But for reality and hang it in the wind
There's no place like CuttyHunk
Hell you'd have to go all the way down to Isla Morada
To get reality like that.
Now there's some folk t'drink with!
It's hard to describe the overall feeling of homesick
A bar off the Alawai near Waikiki, Another in Inverness
But for down to earth look you in the eye people
Well Cutty Hunk and Isla Morada are tops
I'm from Liverpool, old Liverpool.
Reality belongs in that bombed out old town
Pass me that thing dammit
Enough with reality