Funny Cougar Poems

"All a man really wants, is a girl who looks good in a bikini." - Jack Freestone

Yes, he thought – her body shaped
Just like he’d...

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You can’t iron something that’s wrinkled
She’s lived ninety years in this skin
She’d popped in her teeth and she’d tinkled
This birthday she ain’t staying in

Her gout...

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The older woman suddenly beams
When the young man says they are his dream
Thinking he's a fan
She flashes her cans
But his T-shirt reads, 'Cougars Football Team.'...

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There once was a cougar named Rose

who kept the young men on their toes.

Working in her garden

they'd say "beg your pardon

I'll bet you could use...

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There once was a very fine cougar
Who had a top-of-the-line Lugar...
She shot him in the head
Because he never said
She was much sweeter than sugar!...

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