A Summer Bawdy Or Humorous Limerick Poetry Contest-Sponsored by: Tania Kitchin
-------------------------------------------------------------
once was a beach babe named Cassie
who was bold and very sassy
always looked for some fun
under the golden sun
and thought she was very classy
she noticed a surfer named Sam
so she spent her days on the sand
she took off her top
to suntan the lot
her wish came true, he's now her man
Cassie, a green faced witch could not find the right kind of man
I think I’ll make an elixir and create him, she would deadpan
She actually did it, wearing her fanciest ruffled dress
It had not been ironed, so was a bit of a mess
Her purple hat had rosettes of green, fuchsia, and teal
She incorporated a few items she got “in a steal”
her red curly hair got close, and a few of them dropped in
He came out perfectly lovely with bright pink skin
Sorry she said, but I wanted a green-skinned guy
He jumped out of the cauldron and showed that he could fly
she got on her broom and chased him off over a hill
spoil alert, this did not have a happy ending for this guy named Will
He got tossed off his broom and fell into a rather deep pond.
Cassie cast a spell, and he turned into tall pea green frond.
He was not the guy for me she said, picking up an old toad.
The next experimental ingredient, a gloomy forebode.
Cassie the cats-tronaut was thrilled to go into space.
She was one of the first cats to ever be given this grace.
Her parents were not excited to see their baby go.
When she returned, her entire body had an unearthly glow.
What has happened? Asked her mother. How was outer space?
It was marvelous said Cassie, I think we won the space race.
Her daddy thought her glow might scare away a potential Tom.
Cassie did not care in the least, she never wanted to be a mom.
John had never seen such beauty
shimmering iridescent pearls
delicate pink slender neck
her virginal shyness
She was the woman of his dreams
inspiring hopes and wishes
his bride Cassie
Before you arrived,
there were things to do,
so many things,
just for you.
Tiny baby clothes,
folded and stored,
a brand new bed,
and dresser drawers.
Teddy bears waiting,
In your tiny bed,
little bonnets,
for your fuzzy head.
Diapers neatly stacked,
In every corner,
Grandma's knitted blanket,
to keep you warmer.
Your sister kissed you,
through my belly,
then trying to share,
her peanut butter and jelly.
We couldn't wait,
to meet you,
on the special day,
that you had decided.
The time drew close,
then you were here,
your mother's dark hair,
and her nose.
Your sister's fingers,
your father's crooked toes,
your smile so beautiful,
It's all your own.
My heart beats forever,
right next to yours,
my beautiful child,
welcome home.
Ms. Cassie J. Fabell…
You as empty as a shell
People are no longer under your spell
You know that one should not kiss and tell
And it never pays to be so prideful!
Must you always breathe strife?
Did you fail somewhere in life?
Maybe it’s because your miserable inside
Do you have any true friends?
Your back-biting makes it harder to make amends
Do tell, were you frustrated by some man?
Well, play hide and go seek, if you can
Your constant complaining is very juvenile
People now see you as a sneaky reptile
Don’t hide behind any masks
Your still transparent and that’s no task
Don’t infringe on others’ rights
“Live and let live”, go get a life!
Everyone saw you as a magical unicorn
From all evidence your a woman scorned
I'm a bio-hazard
photographer,
deadly psychopathic
spell,
I'm a singer,
& a dancer,
collecting wraith
served straight from hell
Spontaneously outrageous
& strictly ADD
are just a few small aspects
of what you may call me
I'm a Leo and a leader
loud spoken in belief
A rage against machine-er
& quite the expert thief
I can mend your heart or break it
I can fall in love or fake it
you can leave this word or take it.
either way you'll never make it.
Manipulative, I can be
If you strike my conscience wrong
I'll fight to death
till nothings left
but me singing this song
Sitting here all alone
thinking, just how much you've grown
You're growing up, your almost two
My joy the first time holding you
There's an empty feeling in my heart
because we are so far apart
It was so hard to say goodbye
I remember curls, and big brown eyes
Lately I've been really sad
Please don't forget that I'm your dad
I'll never forget my favorite girl
the greatest thing in this big world
If I had one wish, it would surely be
For you to come down and live with me
I know it's what every dad would say
But I know your mom would say "no way"
If your mom and I could share
I could show you Cassie how much I care
Leaving you wasn't what I'd planned
maybe someday, you'll understand
I never missed anyone so much, not ever!
You will be a part of me forever
I'll come back, I just don't know when
I just have to keep missing you, till then
I'm starting to cry like running water
I love and miss my precious daughter
Looking for the formal definition, structure, and history of this poetry form? Visit the Poetry Dictionary entry below. Then return to explore how PoetrySoup members bring the form to life through their own poems.